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Is forgiveness required? Is it hypocritical to judge others? I see hypocrisy all the time.

Capitalist 5 Feb 27
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11 comments

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Forgiveness serves no purpose in my life but if others feel the need to forgive someone, go for it. I'm more of a move on or walk away kind of person.

I'll apologize if I'm wrong, but I don't care if I'm forgiven or not. How can you really be sorry if you expect to receive forgiveness.?

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I judge, and I can never forgive, the Bible Thumper that put fear of his God into me at age 10.

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Required for what? The only time I think forgiveness is required is if you have to continue to interact with that person, for instance with your spouse, because forgiveness means to also no longer hold them accountable. I also think that forgiveness must be asked for and that there are things that can't or shouldn't be forgiven. Who would dare to ask a woman to forgive a person who sexually abused her as a child for years. When I see people on tv who say they forgive the perpetrator I am baffled as to why you would do that. I think that acceptance is required and that people confuse the need for acceptance with forgiveness. Acceptance is just being able to accept, ok, that happened, I'm no longer disturbed by it, I no longer feel hatred or the need for revenge but that doesn't mean I'll ever forget what you did or forgive or have anything to do with the perpetrator.

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Is it not hypothetical to ask such questions???

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Yes, forgiveness is a requirement for rational people. We do not forgive because we are trying to be good people. We forgive because forgiveness is a logical necessity.

Forgiveness is not the granting of a pardon.When we forgive we come to the realization that our thinking has been in error, and that our negative judgments were incorrect. Having set our minds straight, we are in a position to experience a life of joy and ecstasy. The alternative is to stew in grievances, negativity, hatred, stress, depression, ill health and insanity. Isn’t it more rational to choose the former?

Very often we don’t like what other people say or do, and sometimes we have to protect our bodily selves, but that is a different issue. There are reasons why people do what they do, and in their shoes we’d do the same thing. From a cosmic perspective, we are, in fact, in their shoes because we are all a single united entity.

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No, judging others is a common, everyday occurrence.
Similarly, forgiveness and rehabilitation of one's image must be earned, not given freely.
The bible claims otherwise,; yet another example of how it warps prople's minds, by causing them to think they're not 'spiritual' enough and will be punished for simply being normal human beings.

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Forgiveness must be earned and unlike the stupid Christian definition of he word to forgive someone DOES NOT mean you also forget what they have done, that is a simple and open invitation to further criminal activity, trust too must be earned or in such a case re-earned.

IF Judgement is based on the proven illicit actions of the perpetrator then no it is not hypocritical to judge others, your own actions, habits or mistakes have no bearing on what they have done whatsoever.

Hypocrisy is more to do with assessment, false comparisons and self aggrandizement than judgement of others

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Of course it is ... from any perspective. Holding onto anger for vengeance is just stupid. Stupid for ANY reason actually. Why compound a bad act by giving someone a rent-free residence in your head? Forgive them for their ignorance and move on. This is the way. I have spoken.

I agree that holding on to anger etc is not helpful, but how is forgiveness the only alternative? What about just acceptance?

@Cyklone because it breeds anger and keeps sparking the limbic system to fire up the emotions and retard the pre-frontal cortex from using reason.

@JeffMesser Even if I suspend belief long enough to accept that, and considering my masters thesis was in brain function it's a struggle, the question was, what makes you think forgiveness is the only alternative to achieve that outcome?

@Cyklone why does it have to be the only alternative? and your comment about brain function doesn't scare me if that was your intent. if you want to debate brain function then let's get after it.

@JeffMesser It's not about addressing brain function it's that you didn't address my question. You state that forgiveness is necessary to stop anger. I'm asking why do you believe that only forgiveness will achieve that outcome?

@Cyklone actually no, YOU said that. I said it does it. I didnt say only forgiveness does it. I don't believe acceptance is sufficient because my experience is that acceptance still allows insecurity and doubt whereas forgiveness removes the trigger. But I don't have anything to prove that. At some point that admittedly becomes a personal observation. Is that unique to my personal circumstances? that's certainly a possibility. But I don't believe my circumstances are that unique. Plus I have support from Norman Doidge and Robin Dunbar in these observations.

@JeffMesser Is forgiveness required? Is it hypocritical to judge others? I see hypocrisy all the time.
Your response;
Of course it is ... from any perspective.

My experience is that people who have suffered horrendous abuse do not wish to and will not forgive, but they will move to the idea of acceptance and then healing. But what would I know, I only work with this on a daily basis.

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I’ve never felt the need that anyone need be forgiven or be forgiven myself.

What does it mean anyway away from Christian rhetoric?

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No. no, and I do too.

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Judging is what we do every day, in every aspect of our lives, every choice we make, every decision one way or the other. The hypocrisy lies in not owning up to our choices, and our decisions, and in not taking responsibility for them. Forgiveness in many cases is necessary to move on, but only a fool forgets.

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