I think "poor judgement" is putting it very lightly. How about not having a clue what the hell he is doing. It must really gall you to even see your tRumper neighbors.

@JackPedigo No actually it makes me sorta sad. The tonal quality of my comment is lost when typing. If you had heard me say "poor judgment is trump's middle name" dripping with sarcasm you would understand the understated was part of the comment. hahahahahaha
Back to the neighbors, they can't even tell me why they think trump is so wonderful. I try to ask what about the lies, they don't think he lies about what is important - SERIOUSLY - I try not be be judgmental and usually just go 'to each his/her own' and shrug my shoulders. Opinions are indeed like assholes. It is just sad how gaslit they are and it is the TV programming/news they watch. Even with smart phones unless one is willing to check out non-biased news sources (need to use www.mediabiasfactcheck.com) the selections you are offered are reflective of what you search for. Even then I occasionally will get something from fox or other far right source. THAT is what makes me angry, they invaded my computer, or that is how it makes me feel when a far right (fox) option appears on the right when I'm on lets say youtube.

@silverotter11 Interesting about tonality. Many other languages have marks to change how words sound. Ours doesn't which, I think, puts us at an disadvantage. It could be one reason we very often misinterpret what another has written.
As far as the misguided people it may simply be they are unable to step away from their clique. A lot of people are like that and even if one has misgivings one is often afraid to say something. I am havaing a serious issue with my daughter. She told us her husband was a 'dreamer' and relayed a story of his financial mis-handling's before they met. Even though she is the main earner (and she complains about this) she still lets him have final say of their financial dealings (or mis-dealings). It has gotten to the point of robbing their son of his college fund I set up. When I try to explain my feelings (try not to point fingers) she gets uncomfortable and changes the subject. People don't want to hear things that may make them feel they are unable to control a situation. It's a natural tendency so how can we change that???

@JackPedigo Well, ya can't. Your daughter's situation is similar to my situation with my ex. But when my job in printing disappeared into the computer world I needed him to be more financially responsible and less dreamy. We lasted 2 years under that change and he left, angry I would not finance his 'dreams'/debt. I realized he really never saw me for who I am, that MY dreams did not matter so good ridance. We all get our epiphany and accept change or we don't and try to hang in there. That she dipped into your grandson's college fund would not sit well with me but that's just MHO.

@silverotter11 Thanks for listening and replying. She did not 'dip' into the account as she cannot remove any money. I created the account and have added lots of money. 3 years ago they wanted to buy a house. They have an off-road jeep and said it was worth $20K but needs to be fixed. I asked how much to fix it and she said they did an estimate and it would take $4K so (in good faith) I lent it to them. I then told them instead of paying me back add it to their sons 529 plan. The husband thought he could fix the car so didn't use the money. They could not come up with a down payment and still rent. He has a catering business but found he owed $4K in back taxes. So no money back. In 3 years there would have been a large interest accrued. Now they are planning on a Europe vacation and said she would mail me the money back in small installments. This is the husbands doing as she is smarter but weaker. He is not mean nor violent just living in lala land. I have gotten her to order some books on being assertive and she is interested but??? It's pretty bad when the grandfather has more concern for a grandchild's future than the parents!

@JackPedigo Glad you cleared that up.

@silverotter11 She said she would call this weekend. I have to tell her I feel used.

@JackPedigo My parents would not co-sign for my first house, admittedly I was trying to purchase it while also attempting to be a self emplyed potter. When they said no I put that dream aside and went back to the printing industry and got a job doing 4-color separation (camera work). My weekly pay was TWICE what the note payment was going to be and STILL the bank gave me a hard time. I was so pissed I demanded to speak with the manager, I am sure I cursed up a storm, but damn it I jumped thru ALL the hoops they laid out so what was the problem I demanded. Is it 'cause I'm a woman? Single? WHAT?!?! Then I just sat there glaring at him waiting for an answer. My loan was apporved and I bought my first house It was in the Ravenna district of Seattle just up from the PCC on 65th.
Sure wish I had kept it but oh well.
Long story but given my history with my mom I was not surprised, it was 1984 and my Dad was starting to have health issues. In the end it all worked out. In 1997 I finally had to find a new way to pay the bills as my job in the print industry was taken over by computers. I became a poor artist doing pottery but I still managed to pay the bill.
Money management and or how one views money sure can mess up relationships. And politics? hahahahaha

@silverotter11 I know the Ravenna district. A former member of ZPG lived on 64th and we often had gatherings there. Nice area.

Couple of stories. My aunt worked for a bank in the 50's. She was single and wanted to buy a house. I don't know what hoops she had to jump but she did get the house. Later, she found a great job working for the Staff Judge Advocate in Europe and she let her mother live in the house. After she returned to the US and her mother died she told me a couple of her brothers felt they had a share in the house and showed up with their hands out. They didn't know who they were dealing with. She married my uncle who did a ton of work on the place (it was a 2 story Dutch Colonial in a nice part of Dallass). After he died I inherited 1/2 share of the house.

When we (my former partner and I) moved to Seattle we went house hunting. We were both doing temp. work but I had a couple of college degrees and she had a masters in International Relations. We had both had a long history with the University of Maryland. We could not find a house in our range but an agent showed us one outside of our price range and we were able to get it (West Seattle - 35th Ave SW). I paid it off in 13 years. I kept thinking one reason they cut us a deal was that we were both white.
I think my late partner, Parvin, was like your mom. She really believed in helping but in a very limited way. Her daughter came to her one day and said: mom, you know all those times I said I hate you? Then she added, Thank You. If Parvin were alive there would not be this issue with my daughter. I am too soft. Yes, money can mess up a relationship if the parties are not honest and up front with each other.

@JackPedigo Good stories. I never recall saying I hate you to my mom. I did confront her before she died. She asked me if I hated her. (I could see my twin's handy work with this query) I told her "no I never hated you, I've always loved you, haven't always liked you very much but that was due to our differences over race and politics but I never hated you. I added my moving to the west coast had nothing to with her, it was entirely due to the fact I never felt at home in New Jersey.
My twin loathed mom, even after mom passed (2007) my sister will make some comment about how she hated mom. I did not hate my mom but when my sister called to tell me mom had passed the little ditty from the Wizard of Oz palyed in my head - ding dong the withc is dead . . . . true story.

@silverotter11 Sorry to hear you didn't have a very good relationship with your mom. Sometimes I don't understand parents. Sounds like she was harsher on your sister than you!

My first wife never bonded with our daughter. Wasn't bad to her just had little to do with her so for the first 7 years of her life I was both mother and father (sometimes friend- which can be a mistake). When my first wife ran off with one of her 'friends' ,took our daughter and moved to Bakersfield I didn't see her for a few years (but still wrote and sent gifts). Later we were able to reconnect. By the time she was 17 we noticed she had emotional issues. Later she told us her mother and boyfriend had another daughter and she became Cinderella (before meeting the prince). She still sees her mother (the step-dad died several years ago) but her bi-polarism has gotten milder and my daughter has forgiven her. Still, I think there are still deep issues.

@JackPedigo It is true my twin was treated more harshly.. My mom noticed I was a loner and was fine playing by myself but my twin actively sought out playmates. The twisted dynamics of the family situation.

@silverotter11 You sound like my daughter. From day one she showed independence and was easy to care for. That independence has helped her cope.