So..., I'm posting this here because, well, you'll see.
I am recreating and reestablishing certan things within my life...again. I thought that the female I have been with, made lifelong plans with would be with me till the end. Apparently I was wrong. There was something unseen that went on that I didnt know about or I was being lied to throughout our relationship. She was my be all, end all. I never once raised my voice or spoke out in anger to her. I catered to her needs and took care of her personal aspects for 5 years. I supported any positive decision that she made. I took care of her 2 children when their father wasnt. My own personal choices of emotion where my own fault. I am acutely aware of that. I know I am not without flaws and there where mistakes I had made. Things that I could have done differently. However, after comming home from work one day, she, the boys, the dog and many other things where gone. This happened 5 months ago. At first I thought that there was something terribly wrong that I had done. Nothing that I could think of could warrent such an action. I have not spoke to her and her not to me. I am over all of it. Im writting this here to get the last bit of it out.
I am ready for a partner again. Im ready for a friend and someone to be close to. Someone that I can play acoustic guitar with and sing CSNY songs with. I don't know how to find this person I need.
There is a particular life I want to live and have that person with me to live it. Its hard to find someone that wants to live an off grid kind of life, that doesn't watch television, and has music move them the way that it moves me. Like I said this is hard to find. I have talked with a girl or two but there is always some shortcomming that puts things even farther out of reach it seems. Im at a loss and don't know what to do. Im not asking for advice per se, and im not "advertising" myself here. Its more of of a way for me to get my fustration and disappoint out. So if you have read this, thank you for being the proverbial shoulder or ear that listened. So thank you....Chris