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My parents send me good morning text every other day. “Praise the lord! Good morning son. Have a blessed day” I hate it and I feel so disrespected, but I kindly respond “Good morning Mom/Dad hope you all have great day as well. This started right after I told them I was an atheist.

jeffgrn 4 Apr 13
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25 comments

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9

I kindly encourage you evaluate your feelings about the matter. My Mom says "I know you're an atheist but god bless you I love you." Her beliefs don't impact my atheism at all. Nor does my atheism impact her. I understand and respect her right to believe whatever she wishes, even if I think her beliefs are a bunch of malarkey. It's not important to me that she know this opinion of mine. I love her and her feelings are more important than my desire that she know what I think on the matter. If she wishes to "god bless" me because it's imortant to her, shrug I say no-problemo and I remain casually unabashed. I only ask that you think about it for your own emotional well-being. Let go and let reason my friend. 😉

Will do! Thanks

8

My ego is not attached to my non-theism and so I'd be grateful that they're still here to talk to me and want to. Since 2000 I've lost my grandparents, my father, my grand aunt and last July my brother who was only 51 at the time. I'd give anything to be able to talk to them again even if they included religious sentiments in our conversations. One day and it could be soon, your parent's texts are going to go silent and you're going to discover quickly enough that your annoyance was petty at best.

My condolences. I have thought about this and you’re right. I’m going to try harder to keep my ego in check. Thanks

6

Why don't you respond with some secular comments that are not too offending or condecending? eg. Enjoy this glorious day that nature has given us.

4

What difference does it make? They are probably doing the best they can. They will probably not change. If you are secure in what you believe, it should just roll of your back. Maybe if you just continue what you are doing, they will eventually realize that it isn't doing any good and back off. If you argue with them, or try to get them see your viewpoint, it will just give them an opening to push it. I'm sure they respect you, but like all fundies, they think they have a duty to try to save you. The best thing to do is grow a thick skin, and ignore it.

You’re right for the most part, but I doubt they’ll let it go. It’s been 5 years already. I’m going to try harder to ignore it though. Thanks

4

I'd just say hi.

Hi

3

There is a point where your respect for your parents needs to be reciprocated. I disagree with those telling you to ignore it; you don't need to be rude but, you do need to be assertive in telling them to respect you.

3

This would annoy me no matter who was doing it.

However I guess if it had been my parents I might have just put up with it.
But my parents never did that to me?

My Dad did once say "You're going to really want God when you are confronted with death.". He really sincerely believed it so I really didn't have an issue with him saying it.

3

They will probably quit after a while.

I hope so too.

3

The phrase “have a blessed day” always burns my biscuits. I once had a mechanic say that to me as he bowed. Is it a southern thing or can it be found everywhere?

That’s possible, but I’m not sure. I heard it a lot growing up in the SC.

3

I would find that very draining. Difficult to make them cease without offending. I hope you find a solution.

It is! I’m just going to continue to disregard it. I guess the goal here was to hear how others deal.

1

I live in Oklahoma, and many customer service professionals say, "Thank you, and have a blessed day." I always say, "You, too." If they need to believe in an imaginary person to tell them how to be a moral member of society, so be it. I feel sorry for them that they are incapable of having morality with out it.

1

After explaining to them one last time that you are not a Christian, and that you don't appreciate those type of comments, then I would start replying with Bible quotes of your own. Try Ezekiel 23:20 or most of the book Song of Solomon.

1

When they tell you to have a blessed day respond with "Allah willing". or send this to them: “Allahumma salli ‘ala Muhammadin wa aali Muhammad (O Allah, send blessings upon Muhammad and the family of Muhammad).”

1

A simple good morning response is fine. I have religious friends who know what lane I'm in on this subject, so when they are start babbling or try to "God bless me" or whatever the hell, I just nod and smile as if dealing with a psychiatric patient.

1

Could you say something like, "Thanks for the warm wishes. I know I will have a great day regardless of any possible blessings. By the way, you DO know I don't believe in God, right? So you really should be passing those blessing wishes on to someone who might actually use them."

1

As a mother of 5 grown children...I had to laugh out loud! Speaking with a mom's voice...our children will always be our loved son or daughter. Now, I would not do what your parents are doing, but they are attempting to say, 'we love you,' in the only way they know how, especially if you have told them, something different to their religion! You would probably get same reactions if you had reported that you had become Buddhist! Just claim your truth and be thankful that your parents are able to send any kind of message, that informs you, that they are well and have you on their minds! The simple truth is you are on different paths now...that is all there is!

1

Don't you just hate being "worked on?" I know I do. I have a couple of friends who do this to me and I give them plenty of side eye.

Deb57 Level 8 Apr 14, 2018
1

If you want to change their behavior, simply ignore all texts that contain religion. If they ask why you didn't respond, just act surprised and say, vaguely, that you've busy, then change the subject, or wander out of the room.
Stay happy and busy, ignoring them unless they are behaving normally with you without referencing religion. Then give them positive reinforcement by smiling and looking at them, and/or responding positively to religion-free texts.

Another thing you could do is to text back. "I don't believe in god. Please cease such references with me," with each received religious text, without any further comment, then refuse to respond to their protests. Repeat this line each time they send such a text.

But it would be more effective to just ignore the religious texts in the first place. Act like your parents don't exist. Be busy and happy, forcing them to chase after you to get your attention.

I trained my own parents to stop accusing my kids every time I visited them, by saying "Look at the time! Gotta run! Love you!" and LEAVING every time they started attacking us when I visited them.
It only took about four times before my mom would start shushing my dad whenever he started accusing my kids.

1

at least your parents are gratefull for the creator who created the heavens and earth, and you feel disrespected ! your duty is to respect and Honor your parents no matter what they say or do., and you say ?

Please provide some evidence, facts and data to support your claim of the existance of this "creator" you mentioned.

@VictoriaNotes No it's not sarcasm - we have a religious person in the room.

You're talking to atheists/agnostics. I think you've found the wrong site?

Preaching any god to us is kind of the reason we're here to begin with. To avoid that.

If you continue being judgmental (or mean) - you will be reported and removed.

There are probably some willing to debate religion with you and you can create a post if that's what you're searching for.

Hopefully this is satire! If not, why are you here

@laurastevens...I believe respect goes in both directions? A parent needs to respect their child, too!

You do realize that if someone doesn't believe in God, then the ten commandments are a fruitless topic of discussion? If you want to make the world a better place, go donate to a reputable charity, and stop barking up the WAYYY wrong tree on this website. Or MYOFB if the non-interventionist way of life is beyond your comprehension.

@Laurastevens And you've been reported. Insults are not allowed here.

Differences of opinion all the time - but we leave that mean stuff behind us here. (For the most part).

@jlynn37 <

>

@Laurastevens Thanks for the video and thanks for trying.
I wish you well and success in finding what you are searching for here and in your life.

@jlynn37 <

>

@Laurastevens Please do not send me any more YouTube video. Someone's opinion means nothing to me. The only one that can produce evidence, facts and data for the existence of god.. is GOD. Humans can only give opinions.

@jlynn37 Lynn, would you recognize God if you met him on the street ?
<[reasonablefaith.org] >

0

It should be a two way street. If they want to make religion taboo, neither of you talk about it. However, if they bring it up, you should be able to respond in kind. A "good morning, the sunrise is beautiful and didn't require a god to make it!' text might be warranted here.

0

Eh. every set of parents have their own forms of passive aggression. compared to what mine do this is a minor annoyance,

0

When you are at peace with where you are that should not bother you Sir!! Your parents love you and they have been conditioned to be like that , you are aware of that. Don’t let your ego get in the way my mother does the same thing that’s just her way. Nothing she wouldn’t do for me .

0

That's very difficult. But because it only started happening after you told them you were an atheist then it is a passive agressive move on their part. If it were me I would tell them that you respect their beliefs and you would appreciate it if they would respect yours. Tell them you love them and love to hear from them but they need to do it with respect. If you don't stop it now it will get worse and more difficult to stop later.

0

Do they send those greetings in an attempt to convert you or, simply, because that's the way they feel? If the first scenario is the case, tell them they are wasting their and your time; if if the 2nd... go in your merry way and don't say anything.

I would....

0

I think your response is nice and appropriate. I don't believe you are being "disrespected" per se. It's passive aggressive. But I hear ya. Do they KNOW you would not necessarily appreciate those words? If they do know, then they have a Boundaries problem. They're rubbing it in. It's hard for them But, you know, I wouldn't tell them to stop. Try to Just let it go. Do what you're doing. Maybe call them more often for some real conversation, beyond a routine text? Some years down the road when they're both gone, you might think, Oh! What I'd give right now to hear my parents greet me in the morning like they used to do.

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