We're all in different stages in our lives. Seems the times I was super happy and feeling loved and loving life along with the attention of another, that feeling didn't last long before it ended badly. So I'm far more wary than some might be in getting involved with anyone else at this point in my life.

It's been 3.5 years after the last relationship ended (badly) I'm just now feeling the tinglings of slight infatuation with a couple of acquaintances, but I'm not quite ready to jump into any headiness as could happen if I act on those slight crushes.

I'm quite happy at this time in my life to even think that I can feel an attraction for someone other than the guys who have done me wrong in the past. I'm thinking I'd like to quit while I'm happy and unattached, but with hope that I'll feel like sharing happiness with someone at some point while it's still possible. It's a slow process - not to be rushed - a little more time to feel comfortable with myself before sharing too much of my life with someone else, for fear I'll lose myself again.

Sometimes directly after getting out of a bad relationship or marriage, one is ripe for falling head over heels for someone inappropriate and after the reality of that sinks in, the pendulum swings the opposite way. It's a time when the hurt party might get taken advantage of. I've seen this happen many times, so perhaps I'm a bit too wary of that.

If you're looking to become infatuated with someone, I doubt it will happen, but it seems to happen when you least expect or want it to happen!

A very happy time

Don’t feel bad … love is always fun at first. Then it levels out — and sometimes it doesn’t work out.

As an aside, it should absolutely not take another person for someone to be happy. Happiness should come first, from within, and then perhaps be enhanced with a partner.

Stories like this make me happy but also remind of the old saying... "shallow water makes noise." Let me explain.

People who are truly, intrinsically happy, are busy enjoying life. They don't have interest in or the time to broadcast or advertise. Love is also a personal thing, not for public consumption. People in true love are in a hurry to savor love, happiness and enjoy more, busy enjoying what they would do next... like make a beautiful place, see beautiful places out there, enjoy the beauty, music, cuisines and other passions they enjoy - especially when you fall in love in your middle age or after to enjoy what you missed out on. They don't have time or posting on social media or telling friends how great their love is. If they do, they are not busy loving.

There are two types of love I have seen here. Intrinsic or true love and love for consumption of friends and others.

When the man or woman is eager to take photos and share with friends, or eager to introduce to friends or can't wait to tell others how beautiful life is... that love is most likely for the wrong reasons, it is superficial. For example, if a woman is happy to have a boyfriend because until now all others had men and she was the only not to have one. For the man, being single may feel just incomplete, not exactly knowing what love would mean to him in the big scheme of life. I have seen it many times.

Haven't you heard these?... "We are just like twins, we think so much alike", "We are just made for each other", "we don't need much when we have each other"... only to see those not to last too long.

I believe true love lives quietly.

I had a conversation on a dating site 4 years ago where a woman wanted me (for the first meeting) to meet at dinner with friends - it was either to check me out or to show off to friends. I balked for good. If you do not know yourself, are not confident to make adult decisions about you and life or if your love is for public consumption, I am always out.

I have friends who get like that and a few months later they are moping around all devastated. Why even bother?