The day my wife died

Everyday, when I check if you replied to my DMs.

When I was 19 I ended up homeless for two nights. I had another apartment lined up that I was going to be subletting from a friend but he was out of town. I had been living with my girlfriend at the time but had been out of town at my parents. I was doing a lot of drugs back then, mostly meth. My parents noticed marks on my arms and that I was acting strange (I was still "tweaking" ). I just denied everything over and over. They wanted to put me in rehab but didn't force it and eventually brought me back to my girlfriend's apartment. I came home early. She was there with her ex and wouldn't talk to me. I called a friend who dropped me off at my new place but I didn't have keys yet - I was supposed to get them from another friend (the guy I was subletting from) in a week. I thought I might be able to stay with another friend that lived close by but they weren't home. This was before cell phones and I didn't even have a quarter for a payphone. I just walked around all night. The next day I went back to my girlfriend's and her ex was still there. She still wouldn't talk to me, although at least her ex answered the door. He just told me she wouldn't talk to me. I waited outside for most of the day, angry, scared and depressed, hoping she would come out. She didn't. Then I tried my friends that lived close by again but they still weren't home. I walked around again and finally went back to the place I was moving to but couldn't get inside and slept for a few hours in a chair on the porch. Then, around 3 or 4 am I noticed a broom on the porch of the house in front of the garage apartment. I grabbed it, pried a window to the apartment open through the burgalar bars, and used the broom to flip the deadbolt.

That was 30 years ago and I wouldn't know that person now. But I remember it being the lowest point of my life. If I told most of the people I know now about it they just wouldn't believe me. I know that because, when I was in my thirties I was LVN and used to tell stories from that period in my life at work. One day someone got mad at me and told me "everyone knows you've been lying all the time". I was shocked but learned not to talk about my Wilder years.

Feeling lonely rite now ? Looking at your beautiful eyes.

Have enough tissues????