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Do you have a hard to shop for Xstian on your holiday gift list? Give the gift that keeps on giving. Just $29.95 on Amazon.

[amazon.com]

SnowyOwl 8 Dec 16
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12 comments

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1

What happens if it starts talking back to me, filling my head with evil thoughts, and making me barf out 30-ft streams of green vomit? Can I sue the manufacturer?

1

I had to look this up! I thought it was a joke, but it really is selling on Amazon, lol. But, this isn't necessary as any Christian will tell you that Jesus talks to them in their hearts, so why go the long way about it?

Ok, so I went and read the reviews on Amazon, and that's where things get interesting. Comedy gold!

2

During the grass growing months Jesus comes to my house to mow. I'm not sure where he goes during the winter months, but I don't need to call him then.

You're lucky. I hire a guy and this lot turned up.

1

WoW!!!

Now all the Fascists evangelized maga death cult members have a parlor game without the use of militarized live action toys they want to kill us with and have martial law with all out civil war!!!

2

LOL Kinda like a religious ‘spin the bottle’.

5

Oh, why not? Sarah Palin talks to him on her cell phone. 🙂

Something tells me that Sarah Palin hears, and talks to, other voices, that also aren't really there, besides Jesus....

3

How do they know it's jesus and not Satan they are talking too.

They’ll believe whatever it identifies itself as……even if it identifies itself as Superman or The Mighty Thor, which is just as fantasy based as all religion.

3

I saw that on Facebook, and I almost posted it here myself. I just wasn't sure if it was a joke or an aqctual advertisement, and didn't want to bother checking up to find out.

I think it’s hilarious either way, real or not. After all the religious have some crazy imaginations!!

4

More proof positive that religion is basically about magic. Just because we don't understand how some things work does not mean it's just magic.

Black magic at that!!!

3

It isn't the first time that I have seen something like that. Only they called them Angel boards back then.

6

Are they gonna market the new Jeezus Trumpy trading cards too?

That’ll just make some excellent material to light a fire with…….and perform some Satanic Rituals!!

They already are!!!

Sold 45,000 of those pieces of shit in one day!!!

[ijr.com]

4

Will be a millionaire by New Year's day.

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