Wow, such serious problems. Send the ones that leave my way. I'll show them my kazoo.

I rarely have that problem, and the only thing I can tell you is I never go out with a woman that getting her in the sack is my goal. I'm not going to lie, I'm a man, of course I think about it, I just focus on having a good time, making sure she's having a good time, and the rest just seems to happen on it's own. Watch the movie "Hitch" and pay attention.

I hate to say it but if theres no kissing and hugging then it's just a friendship.

Being a woman I will give you my perspective if I may. If she is "busy" she's not all that attracted to you. I could be wrong tho. I know in my experiences if I don't want to be intimate with a guy I will find excuses not to and spare him the truth so I don't hurt his feelings. But that hasn't happened in a long time. If this is the case, she needs to find a way out without doing that.

Ask her.

Its her choice and not yours

The boudoir seems to be your main focus and that's likely why it's not happening. If all that other BS you wrote were true you could find it through intimate dinners or leisurely strolls down the market place. You want to get laid - it's not happening and you're a bit miffed - chances are it's because she knows that and because it's been a common goal in her previous relationships - she is waiting you out and if you go this route i.e., it's about you not about what she might have experienced - you'll only prove to her that her suspicions were correct. Slow your roll - let the relationship mature and when she has confidence in you it'll happen. I've been married for going on 30-years and while sex is great there's more that keeps us together. When we were in our 20's we had marathons - now that we're in our 50's it doesn't happen that often and that's OK because we relish the times we have together watching our favorite shows or talking about our grandchildren or discussing our future plans for our house. And though we have our separate rooms - we never end a night without saying "I love you" - that's what is most important.

I would bring up the subject, and find out her feelings about it.

There is some value to chastity. I went through a free-love phase, but it ended in 2005 when I realized that women got hurt when I made love to them and failed to commit fidelity to them. Since then I have lived a chaste life, and I am happier for it. Whether you live together without formal vows, or have an actual wedding ceremony, it is best to make a commitment before entering the boudoir together. This is my experience, and I offer it without judgment. In my opinion, though, you may be happier by contemplating the concept of chastity and applying it to your own life, as you see fit. Just something to think about....

If I know anything about Australian women, when she's ready she'll let you know.