Lol.

I'm game, as long as your definition of wealthy is flexible, and metaphorical.

Since we all know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I spend most of my day looking in the mirror and repeating affirmations. Of course, I take enough time to run a marathon a day and graze on grass to guarantee I won't gain a pound, while I weigh myself hourly and go mental over those 5 ounces of water weight.

But don't worry, I spend a small fortune at beauty salons and plastic surgeons, trying to avoid any trace of expression I ever held on my face or any evidence that I've left my house and actually lived. I also won't bore you with annoying topics on the news but will merely speak in platitudes and the most popular memes of the day.

I'm still looking for a woman that will support me in the manner I wish to become accustomed to!

?

I know this guy, it's The Dude. When did you shave your head Dude?

"Nice try," as I told my teenage daughter when she asked for money. Very funny!