Look out your window, if it doesn’t happen in 10 minuets do a shot, wait another 10 and do another,replete until the rapture or until you are dancing on the hood of your neighbors car naked, whichever comes first.

It is nigh! Even at the door!

I once saw a documentary about rapture enthusiasts.
The most disturbing part was a red neck Baptist loon who spends all day everyday driving about in high traffic areas hoping to be raptured from his SUV the back of which is loaded with gas cans, in the hope that after he has gone, his vehicle will do the maximum possible damage to those sinners left behind.

From what I've heard locally its just Wales that qualifies. Sorry. There's no date given yet so you still got time to find a seat.