I wish I had been as sensible as you when I was young. Mostly I had children because of general social expectations and the desires of my first wife. Those weren't good reasons to go forward with that. That is why I push mindfulness.

I don't buy antinatalism, but one thing antinatalists have a point about is that you should have a lot of respect for the kind of life you're able to give to this new person you're bringing into existence with no say in the matter, because you can guarantee a nonzero amount of suffering that would be totally absent if they never existed. Also you're guaranteeing some unknown amount of suffering for yourself -- parenting is an incredibly challenging and often thankless project with no guarantees, and everyone seems to think it's the gateway to personal fulfillment. That's not fair to children OR parents.

@mordant Trust me , being a parent is only one of the infinite things you can do in life, that anyone can get terribly wrong. I was just aware i was not parent material, and Ive been aware since i was in nappies/diapers :-/ . I hope I have not come across as some kind of pompous fool with my view, it is just the way things are in life for me. Choosing not to be a parent is probably one of the few things i ever got right in life. << It is something I am as proud of, as i am saddened by << there will be no continuation of my gene pool from me, and i won't ever see the priceless images of my own little me, growing up. I have been traveling since i was about 2, and every four years until i was 31, so Ive never met anyone, being as i was a transient. I am from the middle of the last century, so i probably have different views and values to many these days , but I am pleased I never cursed anyone to the potential, of the life Ive led . For that alone I am content , even though I would have loved to be a father . I have made just about every other mistake possible to make in life, But i grew up somewhere down the road , and i look back and i am so glad i never cursed a child into poverty, a chaotic father and an unpredictable life . If i had ever felt this was it , the time, the place and with the right woman , no doubts it would have happened. But, i never found that time, that place or the right woman , so I am as lucky as the child that never was , i didn't mess him or her up and they won't live a life of unbalance, as a result of it .

@Pictishpup I made pretty much every possible mistake, including being a parent. The only thing that Just Worked for me was my professional life, which I was rather "take it or leave it" about. Maybe that's even the problem: what I care too much and try too hard about, I tend to screw up. But hey it's all over but the shouting and there's an endpoint anyway.

@mordant yeah i can totally relate to that :-/ . I am the same , anything that could have been good for me , i generally swerved to maintain my chaos in a self perpetuating cycle. I did not realise the worth in my own physical abilities until i lost them, and once lost is never found. I might come across as a sensible natured person , but i lived through my own self generated madness to create this persona i have now. It is only life experiences that enable me to see the error in my past way. Hindsight is a wonderful thing , but seeing it first would be more productive . I hope your situation, what ever it is resolves itself for you , painlessly .

@Pictishpup Thanks and same to you. Sometimes I think the bulk of my adult life has been spent reinventing myself out of existence. Ironically I think my 21 year old self would look at my 61 year old self and say, wow, I will become what I now despise. And from the other direction, I used to be what I now despise. Life is funny that way ...

@mordant wow yes . i once saw retired life , grey hair , false teeth and tartan slippers as something akin to the Antichrist . It would seem at a slow speed on the mentality cooker, we evolve as we age , to accept exactly that which was always previously unacceptable. I cannot say i wasted my life, I see my present effect, ( where i am in life ) as the end result of the cause of my actions , up to the instant i type now. Had i not been the guy i was , i would not be the man i am now. I was a self destructive idiot when younger, as knew no better , so expected no better from myself, even though i did not like my lifestyle << hence i changed it; But i cannot escape the ripples of my past, as they carry me into my future, with the ailments i bought upon myself ignorantly<< Probably blissfully so . We live and learn , but cannot turn back time to avoid doing what ever it was, that we are displeased about in later life . It is nice to hear someone speaking in the same manner, for a change in life .

Well the ideal world population if you look at resource usage is a lot lower than what we have at the moment, so I applaud the Japanese. It’s a drop in the ocean...

There are other issues, such as the biosphere collapse on land and plastic waste and climate change at sea. Also you should look at projections for topsoil breakdown and insect populations, I find it amazing that people aren’t doing continuous research into these areas.

@Denker Not that I disagree, but do you seriously find yourself surprised that the average bear out there doesn't have an interest in topsoil breakdown and insect populations?

@mordant bears no, but human beings surely should have an interest in how we are leaving the planet for our children and grandchildren? The last research I saw on topsoil suggested 95% of it would be gone in 100 years... quite alarming.

@Denker Sadly in the main they do not seem to have that much interest. I think most people regard such things as esoterica, they are more interested in whether Aunt Sally is liking or commenting on their FB posts.