Your analogy makes zero sense to me. Seriously.

@BlueWave one is very real and the other is fake. Seriously. Its a thing now. These filters.... on top of makeup... its sad. yet all you hear guys bitch about is chicks doing duck face. And chicks bitching about guys in rompers or dick pics. Least it aint fake. I guess you can't take a yin yang?

@ChrisFrost It's your ANALOGY that is illogical. A person using a photo filter is not at all analogous to a man sending and unsolicited photo of his sexual organ. Just stop.

@BlueWave sseriously I don't understand. what is it you don't understand?

@BlueWave ooo I see you read it wrong. I didn't type any thing about unsolicited.

What, exactly would constitute foreplay in this instance? asking for a friend.

@Secretguy Go Steelers? lol

@thinktwice HAHAHA! I heart you!

Perhaps we need a visit to Japan ! :

[huffingtonpost.com]

Nailed it. I think in particular there is a perverse thrill achieved by the non-consent and invasive quality of doing this.

What you say makes perfect sense in social terms. Remember, consent is a social construct, and as civilized beings, we are expected to comply with social standards (no murdering, robbing, lying, etc.).

However, in animal terms, it makes perfect sense for a male to display his virility in the most obvious fashion available, just as it makes sense for a woman to display her fertility. And we often forget that the animal part of our brains often functions unreasonably.

I am NOT condoning, nor advocating the practice. As the recipients are deeply steeped in their own culture, going against its own rules is likely to be taken as an insult, not praise. A man who cannot respect a woman's inner rules reveals himself at once to be a poor choice for a mate.

@pashaonenine I think that's exactly why!

Absolutely!!!

It seems to me the DESIRED result, is some sort of feminine swooning. Also, yes, it's not too bright. Not the first time an assessment of general idiocy has been assigned to my gender. We think with the wrong head.

@Deveno I consider an online dating site the internet's equivalent of a real life singles' bar. I wouldn't go into a singles' bar without make-up, hair in curlers, and only half dressed. And if i did so, it wouldn't surprise me if I was met with expressions of disgust rather than interest. So when a man takes a picture of himself in the mirror, shirtless and with the loo in the background, he shouldn't be surprised at my look of disgust. I'm more likely to smile at the nerdy looking guy in the tie and jacket.

@Deb57 It does speak to a certain lack of sophistication on said hypothetical male's part. It's clearly not a winning strategy, as evidenced by many of the comments.

But let me ask you this: don't you find it even the least bit oppressive that you are expected to "doll yourself up" to attract a mate?

@Deveno That's a good question. I had to ponder a minute. I have always liked to get "dolled up" on occasion, but I think I do it more for myself than to impress any man. To me, it means that my expectations are high. Yes, I would wish a man to think I bothered to look nice for him, but it also matters to me if he goes to the same bother. In the rural part of "NotChicago, Illinois" where I live, it's pretty common to see single men out on the prowl wearing a T-shirt and a ball cap they got free from some seed company, and strutting as if they are a gift to all womankind. Needless to say, pickin's are slim for someone "picky" like me.

@Deb57 I like to dress up, too. It makes me feel more like I am something special. And I can sympathize with how hard it can be to find someone, when you don't just want "anyone" but a certain KIND of someone.

@Deveno not asking me but I clean up but don't doll up . Yes it does feel oppressive and I was mentally cringing with the OP references to makeup

@CrazyQuilter No silly, our income. Duh!

do you feel it is dangerous to talk about this?