The master of ceremonies gave a very public titty squeeze to Ariana Grande. One member here posted a meme of the moment and several other members joked about it. I’m wondering what happened to the touted consensual ethic mentioned here so often. So, I’m curious what you all think: is it wrong for a 60-yr-old man to publicly squeeze the breast of a 25-yr-old woman he doesn’t know? Is it assault? Or is it just a ‘mistake’? Is it something okay to joke about? Or does doing so foster a culture of objectification of women?
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After my own experience, I have a tendency to be somewhat skeptical and open to the idea of “unintentional.” Years back, I used to go roller skating two or three times a week at a local rink. The vast majority of the time there were very few adults on the rink, and most of those were there with their young children. I was one of few there by myself. I was a fairly proficient skater and skated fairly fast when the music was fast, feeling I could react quickly enough to kids falling in my path or making unexpected moves.
One evening, as I was going along at a pretty good clip a group of three young teen girls suddenly came out of the center of the rink directly in front of me. I did not have time to stop, and had I colided with them, I was substantially bigger and one of them might have gotten hurt. So I did my best to cut around them and used my hand to keep the one on the end to my side and out of my skates. No one fell and I continued skating, no harm done. Shortly after, I noticed one of the rink guards seemed to be following me around. I was not doing anything unusual, so I didn’t worry about it too much. After a while, he came up alongside of me and addressed me. He said a young girl had lodged a complaint with him that I had touched her “inappropriately”. I was floored! First, for a moment, I couldn’t even think what would have made anyone even say that. Then I thought of the close call earlier. I had no idea where I had touched her as I was busy trying not to flatten her! I explained to the guard what had happened, and thankfully he believed me (I was a regular at the rink, so the employees kind of knew me). But the situation really shook me up! What if the staff had not believed me or known me? How could I have proved that I had been avoiding a collision, not groping? I kind of stopped going skating after that, out of the realization that I was putting myself at risk. What if her father had been there and reacted the way some of the people on this post have? I would have been defending myself against possible violence for something I wasn’t even aware of doing.
I have not seen the video of Ariana and the preacher, only the sill photo. Given their difference in size, the emotions of the moment, the man’s position as the orator of the service, I would be inclined to give him the benefit of the doubt. My guess is Ariana who would be most knowledgeable of what happened at that moment felt the same way. It is only trial by social media, where everyone feels the need to be judge and jury of situations taken out of context that can get you condemned with little recourse to defend yourself.
I’m glad you were known there, and sorry you no longer feel comfortable skating. I can see your point in general. Having watched the Ariana Grande fiasco, i have doubts about how inadvertent this was. His fingers are really dug in ?
YES..it's sexual assault, and if it had happened to me, he would have gotten outed with an angry scream, a violent shove, and a possible knee to the groin.
Then I would have filed charges.
I hope Ariana isn't going to stay passive about it or she is off my admiration list for good.
I actually have watched this clip and frankly feel everyone is over-reacting, it appears more a problem of height differential than actual groping...i have been groped a few times and this ain't it!
How would you have felt in her shoes, his fingers deep in your breast? Seriously?
@Justjoni been there had that done, like I said.