Just go Dutch, all the time, on everything...or maybe "Tit for Tat"?

Let's see.... help me out here ok.... she's saying that guys that pay for sex turn out to be rapists and abusers.

Have a very similar perspective. You could check out my post: 'The Male Gaze' . Also: 'Uses of the Erotic: Erotic as Power' by Audrey Lorde. She was an amazing writer.

Some powerful statements there. (IMHO)

A major factor making that dynamic so toxic is that nobody’s really up front about it. We’re all just enacting the cultural scripts we were taught, believing that it’s natural for men to want more sex than women do, for men to be the pursuers, and so on. These scripts don’t leave much room for behaviors outside this heterosexual box, either, behaviors that queer gender roles and sexuality and more.

But there are models for outsourcing intimacy, and they’re not all bad ones. It’s acceptable to pay a therapist for their time, emotional presence, and training (though there’s still some stigma accompanying admitting to needing to see a mental health expert). Many people pay for childcare or elder care, which have both practical/logistical and emotional components.

Or take food. Food preparation used to be almost exclusively (in recent Western history anyway) a domestic activity. Now we outsource much of that preparation, and much of the eating of food, to restaurants and the prepared-foods-sections of gas stations and markets.