Why can't women just say it or make the first move then? I have misread signals in the past and I'm very cautious these days. Some girls are so confused that they will be giving out false signals. It's better to just ask directly and avoid ambiguity in communication. I simply don't know why humans, an animal with an organised speech, would rather pretend and be giving signals instead of asking directly. Why are we shy to talk about sensual things?

I don't like to give hints. Mind-reading should really not be in the contract.

Im a straight up kind of a girl, If I want/like/need something I will tell you, If I don't like something I will tell you, and I expect the same from the other person male or female. I do not do hints and head fucks. Be straight up with me and I will be straight up with you. I might pick up on your hints and body language but I can't be bothered with that, Tell me what you want tell me what you need.
If you want me tell me, If I want you I will tell you. BOOM easy.

This should explain everything for you.

I don't do stuff like that. If I want something done, I just come out and say it, I don't play games and expect someone to read my mind. I can't read others minds either. If someone wants something from me, just tell me. That to me is just silly little games children would play.

Men don't have a clue and smart men realize this. If men assume things about women and act on those assumptions without making sure they are right bad shit happens.

Depends on the guy. And plenty of women don't get men's clues either. Sometimes you click with other people and the communication is easier. If oblique hints don't work try more direct communication. Words are good.

That goes both ways. Instead sugar coating just tell men what you want. People shouldn't have to guess what people trying to say or want.

Men aren't mind readers as far as I know.

People shouldn't have to guess. That breeds resentment.

Send him this meme. It should make things perfectly clear. Lol

Sometimes you need to spell it out AND get a confirmation or affirmative from the other person.
Maybe something has changed for them that they are no longer comfortable being a friend with benefits?
You might have to ask.

I have found that when women "read" men's minds, they are usually really wrong (though we may go along with it because we don't want the hassle). As for us reading a women's mind, we know we will most certainly be wrong! .... sometimes with horrific results. For Christ's sake, just assume we are stupid and tell us! I know it is unromantic, but not nearly as much as an argument over something we have no idea of.

So if you don't tell me what you want, and therefore I don't know, it is my fault. Good to know.

A lot of people here have made the point that maybe the person just doesnt8want what you want. That's entirely possible. I'd like to add the possibility that maybe your friend with benefits doesn't like being played. Some people don't like being manipulated. If i catch even the slightest whiff of someone trying to manipulate me into doing something they want (which is EXTREMELY passive aggressive on their part) I will dig in my heels and go mule-stubborn and start spraying Go-fuck-yourself like a hlitter-bomb made of hate. That shit will get EVERYWHERE. The thing is, what they want me to do might be something I would happily do if asked, but the fact that they tried to manipulate me with hints and signs and not so subtle prodding will put me off it immediately.

The thing is, having someone in your life who can read you is great... they're observant and attentive to you, but that's a gift. If you want something, say something. Maybe you get it, maybe you don't, but eithervway you can have some pride in the fact that you tried, rather than manipulated and just hoped you got what you wanted. Just my tuppence.

I guess I'm not sure what you are getting at. Is this about men who don't have a clue or something? Maybe you could be more specific. A picture might help. Just what are you really trying to say?

I sympathize. I recognize that I am clueless and can;t read hints. Couple that with the itchiness of rejection and ...well... I sympathize

Honey, by the time you get to my age you will have been disappointed so much you won't even notice it.

Why not just be an adult and say what you want instead of being childish and wait until a man guesses what you want?

Maybe it's in our jeans!

At first I thought I was on your side then I read on and got confused.
a). Friends with benefits is a no strings arrangement.
b). " I told him a long time ago" both told and a longtime ago are worrying. Did you remind him?
c). He came round to your place, why didn't you initiate something then and there?

I might expect understanding of hints and body language during the act, who wants to give step by step instructions (exceptions made for the young who don't know any better, I'm a good teacher) but depends what you call a hint when it comes to getting to that point. My hints tend to be as subtle as a ten pound sledgehammer, things like "I'd love to have a look at your etchings.", "Do you fancy a horizontal tango?', "Would you like to play naked twister?", "I'd like to get to know you in the biblical sense."(OK, I'm an atheist but I still know what that means) or "What about making the beast with two backs?". Now if someone doesn't get my drift then I just write them off as not interested or thick, but by the sound of if you are expecting telepathy and that level of understanding is rare indeed.

All generalizations are false, including this one.

It's that brain thing...the man wants to protect and the women wants to be protected. Something carried over from 'cave man' days! The rub comes, adapting to this civilized society! We are cultured now, but still have some 'cave people', still in our DNA. It does appear that we have not evolved to mindreading yet! So if you need something other than protection, you are going to have to spell it out!

I just think no one is a mind reader. When I am interested in a women, I tell them directly, leaving no room for discrepancies, and I tell them once. I come off really strong but I don’t want to waste everyone’s time and energy, and I refuse to harass and nag, it’s desperate and wasteful. The more hoops I need to jump through, the less interested I am. I only make enough effort to meet halfway, if I’m not met, I can safely assume the other is uninterested.

Nothing like making your intentions clear#! Who wants to guess? Is it that difficult for you to verbalize your wants? Why make it difficult? Not ALL men need direction and are clueless as you put it, some have partners who ARENT CLEAR and like drama. I guarantee you that if you make your intentions clear without any gray areas you would be amazed how your relationships would prosper.