At 69 years, and a somewhat sordid background, I've had my share of bumps and dings. My old flight surgeon, and, my current primary physician, off the record, have always given me two choices.
Choice #1 = class three pharmaceuticals.
Choice #2 = whiskey.
Now, both are addictive as hell if you're susceptible to such things. But from personal experience, Wild Turkey works pretty well, less expensive, no prescription required.... Demerol, Percocet, Codine.... all have, for me, more negative side effects than whiskey. But then, I've never had any really serious pain... as in not manageable.
Note: Never mix whiskey & pills. NEVER.

I work in behavioral health. I'm sure there are people who use the pain killers without issue. I don't see those people.I see the ones who use them and then get addicted and then want more and then go for heroin because it is cheaper. My advice is avoid them if you can.

I had a very painful and serious bone tumor surgery, and took Vicodin during my recovery for about a year. And I needed it, too. I found that when you're taking something for pain, and not for kicks, at least for me, I didn't "up the dose" or get addicted. When it was time to stop, I just stopped. You say your family has a history of addiction, but if you have a stable life with social supports and healthy relationships, I'm sure you wouldn't automatically become addicted for just taking medically necessary pain pills. I'd stay away from the stronger ones, though.

You take what you need to keep pain Maneagable, as lots of pain retards healing. Period.

I would agree a TENS machine may help and to be honest simple paracetamol is adequate for all but the most serious pain. IV paracetamol particularly. (Hmmmm thats tylenol). I wouldn't be prescribing opiods post surgery for many reasons, not least of all sedation as you will need to be moving around as soon as possible. However I would not worry to greatly as regards addiction if your px is time limited. Maybe for one week. Work with your prescriber to find the best for you.

Just listened to a TED talk where opioid usage in usa hospitals is way oversubscribed, with very little planning in place in weening the patients carefully off of them.

Pain management is really wacky in the country right now.

If you have a valid chronic pain condition getting medicated appropriately is a tightrope walk.

I imagine you are seeing an Opposite effect. They don't want to treat you as a pain patient so they want to do "quick and easy" regardless of whether it's good for you or not.

A pain/nerve block might be very effective. It depends on where you have the pain. They are not a ton of fun however. Long needle - into the spine or locating the appropriate nerve cluster? Nope no fun.
Or nerve burning. That can work for up to three months. Also not fun. (But all non opioid). And very effective for some folks.

Possibly a TENS Unit might help you manage pain? Again depending on where it is.
Lidocaine patches or Muscle relaxants perhaps?

There are a ton of possibilities but location of the pain has to do with treatment.
Also we have a Pain group if you want to ask there. I'll get the link: "Pain Management and Chronic Pain"

Folks there might have knowledge of more recent treatments.

Not sure if you would qualify, but I would look into medicinal pot.
[doh.wa.gov]

Nothing is wrong in your thinking. Because of the opiod scare, doctors are highly nervous when patients request opiods, even if they justified. Doctots sre under their own microscope these days.

However, doctors are a conservative lot in general. It is hard for them to change or adapt. Because opiods worked so well for pain management for their patients, its a paradigm they are stick on. The overarching paradigm in modern medicine is one ot trearing symptoms. Medicate the symptom and hide it, but forbid that you seek out the real cause of the disease and address that. In this way they are assured a constant clientele flow, as the same disease reappears in a different manifestation elsewhere in the body.

They are very poor at considering or prescribing alternative pain control practices. So they are caught on this roller coaster of their own making.

I have heard of similar apparent contradictions, but no personal experience with it. I would think it's unethical for them to not offer a non-opioid when you've asked for such. I mean, to the point that they should be reported.