So many times a person is looking for comfort and Christians say "I'll pray for you." I've said "I hope it works out," or "I wish you the best..." but I don't see a non-religious equivalent.
Once, I was in my office, when a co-worker walked in and shut the door. He told me that his 1 1/2 year old grandson was diagnosed with leukemia.
Nearly in tears, he talked about the struggles the parents had. That he didn't know if the child would live. How the child was suffering and in pain-- and only a baby. I couldn't pretend to know what he was going through, though I felt truly sad hearing his story.
No words really seemed to fit. I did tell him that I had a cousin diagnosed with it as a child-- who survived, is an adult, and is doing well.
He stared at me-- waiting for the "I'll pray for you." I know, because he eventually said "Thanks for listening. I know you'll pray for me."
It wasn't the time to make a retort on that front, so I just nodded and let him go.
But, I've always wondered what is a good replacement phrase for the non-theist?
I'm so not good with that mushy stuff.
I usually say I'm so sorry, and add that I'm sending positive thoughts.
So far, nobody has called me on it, because, technically, prayer and positive thoughts are the same thing..imagining a better outcome.
May you have peace in your healing. I hope he has comfort during this time. I sorrow for you, may you all be strong and healing come soon. There are all kinds of compassionate statements that aren't religious. Just think of the different things the sufferer may be going through and give hope or offer help.
I would think something like " is there any way I can help please let me know." I would love someone tell me that instead of the believer equivalent to " I will think of you" ( but never actually do any )
I usually say my thoughts are with you, if there's anything I can do to help, let me know.
I wish you the very best or my thoughts are with you.
How about, I feel empathy for you and am willing to help you however I can.
Here is my number, you can reach me anytime. Give me your number so we can talk and you can tell me your specific needs so I can help.
I hear that often. I say 'thank you'. It is their cultural sentiment, which counts. Though if it came from me, my insult would be to say 'sending thought's and prayers' (in other words, screw you) LOL.
I offer concrete ideas if possible: rides, cooking, child/ dog sitting, whatever. I feel when a person is stressed they may easily overlook the obvious things that might help. But I if they ask for prayers,
May the odds be ever in your favor? I was always kind of enameled with the Hunger Games sort of catch-all phrase
Ask them if there's anything you can do to help. Buy them coffee if they're down or lonely.
I always ask what I can do such as cooking, cleaning, laundry. I then follow up with a call or stop at the grocery to pick up staples such as milk, eggs, etc. I am currently checking in on two older ladies in my area and I have taken care of pets if there is an emergency or they need to go to the hospital. You don't have to be religious to try and make a positive difference in the world. If they don't want that type of help, I just tell them I am thinking of them and am here to help if they need it. leaving the option of help up to them.