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Fear, is it a motivator in your life?

There are so many things in our lives we cannot control. I feel that there is something always to 'fear' and maybe it is a much better motivator than anything else.

Is it the fear of being poor that keeps us in miserable jobs?
Is it the fear of being single that keeps us in bad relationships?
Is it the fear of other people that makes us want to have a gun for personal protection?
Is it the fear of getting hurt that makes us hard to find love?

What is your fear motivator?

Akfishlady 8 Mar 3
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32 comments

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0

Fear is a strong and deeply ingrained motivator. However, unless you are in physical danger, I believe in the long run it is usually a harmful motivator.

8

I am starting to develope a fear of Orangatans and men with orange hair. This is very strange to me because I am an animal lover.

we'd probably do better with an orangutan for President !

@evergreen "Right turn, Clyde!"

Funny

Perfect!

7

There is nothing to fear but fear itself, and global warming, nuclear war, global terrorism, and our President.

@Akfishlady It doesn't keep me up at night. The President, a little bit.

5

This is a very good question. And, I'm really not sure how to answer it. I equate fear with dread, and dread, to me, is a gnawing, ever-present feeling that sort of roots in the back of one's mind, occasionally coming forward and engendering conscious fearfulness, then receding to again occupy a space not willingly acknowledged. Mind you, this is only how I relate to fear in the sense I'm interpreting from the post.

In that context, I would say that my primary fear is not a motivator, but rather just an irrational notion, based on possibility, but not rational as a focus, or outcome that can in any way be influenced by anything I may have the power to do something about. It is an experience that some on here have been through, and that I would not wish on my worst enemy, if I had one. It is exemplified by what happened last month in Florida, and it is extremely difficult for me to even say the words.

@Akfishlady it could drive one mad, if not let go, or at least suppressed.

@Akfishlady I used to live above the carrick -a -rede, rope bridge . in N.Ireland and would walk over it every day at least once. When My first grandaughter came and her parents took her over it I was terrified

I love flying. I did it for a living when I was younger. I loved feeling the power of the engines at takeoff and when you left the ground it was like being way up over any worries or problems.@Akfishlady

4

being told i can't motivates me

3

Fear for my kids, I am over protective, over cautious where they are concerned. Always making sure they are ok on every level.

3

I knew someone once who was a photographer in war zones - he literally had no fear - seriously it was missing in him, consequently he never knew if he was in some way using or harming the people he was capturing on film - So I am thinking maybe fear is a necessary feeling to keep us grounded - I think that growing up I feared being hurt by others now I am old I mostly fear hurting others

3

Capitalism requires fear. Otherwise fear is good and healthy. "Maybe I should be careful going into that dark cave." "Where is that growling coming from? " I guess deciding when to ignore, embrace or overcome our fear is how to look at it.

2

Yes, fear is a great motivator. If your goals aren't scary then they're not high enough.

SamL Level 7 Mar 9, 2018
2

Fear used to run my life, in a negative way. Now, I fear living an unfulfilled life, and that is what motivates me to do better each and every day.

2

I don't think its fear. More like an acceptance of the reality that everything can change tomorrow. All we have is now, make the most of it.

2

I used to make pretty much all my life decisions based on fear... And the results were almost always bad.
I don't do that anymore. 😉

1

I do believe that there is a linear connection between fear and many unfortunate actions, I believe though that the true line is longer. Ignorance/lack of quality education, results in a lack of understanding of many things which certaiinly leads to fear. Ultimately, fear leads to hatred and then onto violence in the end. While all of those persons so afflicted don't necessarily finally resort to violence, they do make many mistakes owing to fear. As to the specific examples in your statement, I do believe that folks stay in miderable jobs as a result of fear, but it isn't fear of being poor, since many who do keep those jobs are very poor and have nothing much to show for it. Often the reason for several of these, I believe, is more than just fear but a lack of vision that offers any alternatives. Again, that is a sort of ignorance. The whole gun for self-protection notion is fear based and terribly inaccurate. I'd love to see a statistic on how many people actually die not just with a gun in the household, but BECAUSE there is a gun in the housenold. And as far as the poor souls who believe they can "fight off the government" with a gun, they need only to understand that the US government could kill them and everyone in the household without being within miles of the actual household. It is a dilusion of safety that doesn't really exist.

1

I don't consider my personality as fear-oriented, although I can see that trait in others. If something is unquestionably dangerous, then I respect it as such. I'm not an idiot. But life is too short to give in to fear unnecessarily.

Deb57 Level 8 Mar 24, 2018
1

I have fears, but I don't think they motivate me. They make me cautious, but not motivated. Okay, maybe they motivate me to be cautious.

1

Didn't fear much, just sharks and werewolves, until the kids arrived. My fears now are for them.

1

Most people are motivated by fear, some more than others. Some fears are rational to a point, like snakes, bears, Trump... Overcoming irrational fear is a triumph of conscious will over subconscious motivations.

I fear being unprepared and running through all of my money before I die because of medical bankrupsy. If I wasn't worried that the trumpublicans might dismantle social security and medicare I'd retire now. I'm seriously considering moving to Canada, New Zealand, or Australia so I don't need to worry about that stuff at all.

1

I don't know what the source of my fears is.

I'll notice I'm afraid in everyday situations. I feel pressure at times. It's probably imaginary. Pressure to do well. Pressure to be accepted. Social pressure that's triggered inconsistently.

Some days I can handle it. And others, I crack.

It's in our DNA to think about our survival. We all perceive threats to our livelihood. I think if we knew exactly why we were afraid. There wouldnt be a reason to be afraid. The biggest fears I have surround the unknown.

I simply don't know what's going to happen and I'm afraid. That lack of clairvoyance, the loss of insight. We know when we recognize unfamiliar territory. And it eats us to our core

1

I quite like fear as I imagine it to be the precursor to anger - anger is the only feeling that leads directly to action - Since someone told me this a long time ago- "If someone si standing on your foot fear won't get them off sadness won't get them off happiness won't get them off only anger will get them off. Now when I feel fear I push anger up quicker than I would have before I don't mean rip roaring anger just the only feeling that promotes change

1

I fear becoming like my parents, which motivates me to choose and behave differently.

1

Fear is a motivator for me. Because life feels so short and fleeting, I fear wasting any of it waiting around for things to just happen. I take jobs I hate as they offer a steady paycheck while I pursue better things. I spent years with my ex because I was afraid to be alone, but one day I had the crystal clear realization I was already alone as we'd stopped communicating and whatever we once were was in the past, so I walked away.

A healthy dose of fear can keep us on track, as easily as it can derail all our hopes. It just depends on the focus of that worry.

1

I fear hurting others....it's too easy to do despite the best of intentions.

1

I am the sort of person who is more motivated by avoidance of negatives than by the possibility of positives. I've found the latter to be to unreliable anyway.

Still, I wouldn't say I'm motivated by fear. I don't FEEL fearful. I don't have anxiety. I don't feel in jeopardy. I guess I must feel I have good avoidance strategies. Or at least I understand that once I've actually taken whatever action is at my disposal, there's no point in worrying about what isn't within my control.

Yes I'd say that fear keeps one in a miserable job for example, and that's irrational. If I hated my job, almost any change to a job I didn't hate would involve a drop in income, however, the higher income isn't sustainable because eventually job misery ruins your health in some way or other.

Back in the early years of this century I took a miserable gig but I made sure I got combat pay (still haven't exceeded that hourly rate after all these years) and I knew it would just be for a couple years max, and that turned out to be the case. If it hadn't, I'd have made it happen myself. I did this because I needed the cash flow to pay medical expenses (my late wife was going through a lot of experimental therapies and the insurance companies wouldn't pay for them).

I'm reading a book right now that's covering the topic of why people stay in miserable jobs and the case example I recall is a guy who mixes paint in a hardware store all day, hates it with a passion, and really wants to quit and move to Florida and be a fishing guide. But he stays with the crap job because he (and I'm guessing his wife) don't want to take the risk and the cut in income. And probably beause the good ol' Protestant Work Ethic conditions you to feel guilty if you don't hate your job -- there must be something evil about enjoying the curse of work 😉

1

No fear is like all other emotional states is simply a trick of the mind. I fear very little if anything and I've never feared the end as death is just another state of existence...

1

I think each person is different... ambition can take many forms. I guess in general I'd prefer not to have to use fear as a tool... it's one of the negative feelings. Better to use something else like pleasure rather than fear which causes pain, right? Fear can easily lead to anxiety

Liviu Level 4 Mar 3, 2018
0

FEAR
Fuck
Everything
And
Run

I had my fears when I was younger. Now that I'm seasoned and somewhat experienced those fears have gone.
I do have one fear. That is being struck with Alzheimer's or Dementia. As a Caregiver I worked with clients that had it. It's hell on everybody.

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