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Will You Still Love You When You're No Longer Young and Beautiful?

Throughout my life I've seen folks of little substance use their sex appeal and looks to skate through life. Using others or getting a easier "break" because of their outward appearance.

Ironically, they may spend hours in the gym, keeping to a strict diet, and social schedule. Yet all the while, they are starving their character in a shallow wading pool of recycled sound bites and little to no intellectual or emotional intelligence.

I could be wrong, but so far in this version of my current life this seems to be 95% of the NPCs I'm running into now a days.

It is truly sad.

RobertFoley 6 Sep 4
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39 comments

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1

I usually don't give my appearance much thought. I booked into an appartment yesterday for a vacation and the room has a big mirror facing the bed. Quelle horreur!! I'll avoid it like the plague.

9

Oh, sweetie, I am 71 and I love myself Far More than I did in younger years when I allowed remarks such as "no longer..." to phase me. Far MORE beautiful now, inside & out!

9

There is nothing, and I mean nothing, sexier than intellectual conversation.

No one is worth my time if they don't think deeply.

I don't want clever conversation. I just want someone to talk too.

Billy Joel

7

I think our society pushes this shit on us with the advertisements and media that bombards us 24/7. I really do not care what Kim Kardashian or Jennifer Lopez or any of the other "stars" look like in their bikini. We have these people who mean absolutely nothing to me preening on news feeds and taking up room. The older I've gotten the more I appreciate myself and how I look. And frankly I'd like a partner who is fun,honest, intelligent, and sincere.

I couldn't agree more.....I'm sick to death of seeing 34 yr old models obsessing about their skin care regimen and all the "wrinkles" they don't even have yet. Stay as fit as you can be without becoming a gym rat - stay healthy by eating the right stuff - and don't let society push you into doing or being anything that is not really you.

7

The only thing that I am kind of disappointed with now that I have gotten older is my hair deciding to leave the top of my head and move to my ears and my nose.🤪

6

Always wanted to get old, its better than the alternative, but there are many advantages to keeping fit which have nothing to do with impressing shallow people. For one thing, the longer I am fit the longer I can help others and the less I shall be a burden on others.

5

One can actually be old and beautiful too and skate through life. It is an attitude, some people can do it no matter how old and without hours in the gym too.

5

Being able to still "love" as you get older, is not a problem. But the older you get, the harder it is to find someone to love you back.

5

It is very sad ... we are all open to influence by others and looks, intelligence, fitness, interests, etc all play a part ....How great an influence is directly proportional to gullibility.
I have not loved me since I was 18 years old ... but fortunately others have taken up the slack.

5

Heh, I didn't love me when I was young and cute, I don't love me now that I'm middle aged and less cute, and I don't expect to love me when I'm old and saggy. I also don't much like most of the people I run into, but I'm lucky to have found a handful of people in this world whose company I enjoy. I just keep trying to add some of those, mostly to replace the ones that drift or pass away. With everyone else, I more or less just go through the motions and probably seem like a shallowly coded NPC, heh.

I love you.

4

For those of us for who have never been beautiful, aging all seems to happen on the inside. I can't imagine what it's like to lose one's beauty, but I have experienced the deterioration of the only superior asset I ever had: my mind.

People who knew me earlier in life still see me as a nerd. I suppose it's the same way with people who had beauty.

People I meet today tend to see me as doddering and indecisive. They aren't surprised that I have trouble remembering names and events. They aren't surprised when I think slowly. What they see is what they expect to see from an old man. That's sad for me.

I have known people who were born with beauty, confidence, and wealth. They all seem to believe they deserve those things, and that the rest of us are just lazy.

It's impossible for me to imagine what life would have been like as one of the beautiful people, but I have observed it from nearby. I've never met a beautiful person who would trade that beauty away for anything else if they could.

Nonetheless, each of us will lose all our advantages we have when we die.

4

Everything in moderation. I have activities I enjoy, and a basic diet that works for me. Not a fanatic in either of those, but they keep me somewhat healthy and able to continue doing the activities I enjoy, without tiring.

I may have skated by quite a bit in my younger days, with a pretty smile and attractive figure, without working at it all. Now that I'm getting older, I do need to be more active to keep healthy and physically comfortable, but those activities are also giving me pleasure and lift me out of depression, giving me a sense of well being.

I like myself so much more now than I ever did when I was youthful and attractive. No longer do I care what anyone thinks of me, except me. 😉

You look like somebody who might still be skatin’.

@WilliamFleming Not so much anymore. But thanks! When I was skating by on looks, I wasn't valued for my true self, and so as my looks fade, I find my true self shining a bit more, which I like much better. 😉

4

I don't think there is any doubt that beautiful people have an advantage in life but that does not automatically make them shallow people.

I'd just add that shallow people come in all shapes, sizes and genders

4

It's a different process for everyone. Age can be just a number when health is keeping up with the pace.

4

Yessir... That has been life. But hasn't it always? It's tough to meet people I can stand more than 5 minutes anymore. My therapist suggested going to Mary Washington College and auditing a few classes in subjects that interest me. I might meet more like minded people that don't irritate the Jesus Fuck out of me!

"It's tough to meet people I can stand more than 5 minutes anymore." I hear you bro and can relate.

@jlynn37 I guess it goes to... The older I get, the less time I know I have.

One of my favorite people I used to work with put it simply to people he wanted to avoid. He'd look them straight in the eye after they spoke and say, "That's interesting, excuse me!" And just walk away. It left people very uncomfortable and wondering if they had just been slighted or perhaps Frank was a very busy person.

@adaptable1958 You made me laugh out loud... for minutes! 😉

3

Really beautiful people are beautiful from the inside. It radiates from how they carry themselves, what they do, what they say, how they interact with others and the world. I've always felt that way.

3

Having a healthy body demonstrates certain qualities, like self respect and the discipline it takes to keep in shape. We all have different talents and interests and for some, having an attractive body is theirs. Yes, it is a benefit they can use to their advantage. I use my intelligence to make myself appealing to potential employers, friends, and romantic partners. I spend too long reading and thinking about deep things and sometimes neglect other important things because of it, like the health and attractiveness of my physical body. You can make anything out to be bad, if you want. Or you can see the good in things.

3

The most beautiful people I know keep beautiful on the outside because they are beautiful on the inside. Youthful good looks are transient and pall on us, even if time and money are spent to retain them. There are people who just seem to get better looking with age, because they have character and are interested in others, and are not narcissistic and self obsessed.

3

I've always been just average. I've always been hard on myself. Now, finally at almost 64, I'm finally starting to feel comfortable in my skin. I see my mortality and want to make the most of everyday. My physical appearance is so unimportant. Focus on staying active, healthy, informed, passionate, kind, and healthy.

3

Well at 62 I'm no longer either young or handsome (my wife's protests to the contrary notwithstanding) but that has had no influence on how I view myself.

I've not knowingly "skated by" on my looks although I'm sure I've probably found my life easier because I've had some nonzero capital there. I think the important thing, regardless of your various assets or lack thereof, is to live your life in such a way as to always be increasing your self-awareness. This means listening to the input of others and considering their needs and feelings -- improving your empathy and compassion.

You allude indirectly to curiosity as a virtue, and I agree with that. Genuine curiosity is a prerequisite for intellectual and emotional intelligence.

3

This implies I love myself now haha.

3

95% seems an inflated number. Most people are just trying to get through this life as best they can.

3

To me this sounds like an either or situation. I have worked out most of my life and try to keep my outward appearances as good as I can. This is for me and my own self-esteem and health. I will be no good to anyone if I let myself deteriorate. The other issue is inward health or character (I have been told I am a character lol). Just like the package the contents also need feeding and care and growth. Why limit one's identity to one aspect; why not include the whole persona?

@Gwendolyn2018 I agree but find it interesting and would question if it is really logic or simply what is convenient. Sometimes it is easier to accept something than to really look into it.

@Gwendolyn2018 Absolutely right, it does make for a narrow outlook. One missing element in the opinion equation is experience. As we age we also experience the ups and downs and various elements of life (I sure have and my worldview has changed enormously from the time I was younger). Being taught is one thing but without experience it may have little value. Look at how many are taught about a religion and hang on. I did for a long time (I was brought up Catholic and, for me, it was benign and never really created any problems). One experience can and often does change a person. Unfortunately, as I have learned it can make one unpopular especially when they go against the prevailing norm.

3

You raise a worrisome specter. Here I am skating through life based on my youth, sex appeal and good looks, and you have to ask troubling questions. Ironically I have just started working out with weights.

Enough of this depressing twaddle. I’ve had my cup of raw oatmeal with healthy additives. It’s time for my morning walk and then a brisk workout with the new barbell set. Then it’ll be meditation, reading, etc.

The end of my youth stage is so far off in the future as to be safely ignored I think. Please do not bring up the subject again. 🙂

3

What does NPC mean?

Nonplayable characters in games I think

An NPC is a character in a computer game that is not controlled by a human player.
No, I don't understand how it's being used in this context either.

3

I have to still love me because I'm almost my only fan.

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