Distance does matter. It makes something that's tough to do with proximity even harder. Its more than doable, though, and there is one inherent advantage it does have - it forces you to talk about everything.

Meet my wife on this site, did a 1500 mile LDR for a bit, moved there and got married. Then we moved back up here, and now looking at a house in West Richland.

It is hard. You can't be spontaneous, don't have a lot of everyday moments, those daily life moments that are so important for a relationship to grow on.

"Distance doesn't matter in a relationship."

It most definitely does matter.
I don't believe anyone who says otherwise.

I also don't know anyone that it's worked for. At least not for any significant
length of time.

I suppose if the expense of frequent travel doesn't faze a man, then fine. But like you say, there needs to be enough together time and varied enough situations to be able to see how someone handles something other than a good time. It'll be those un-good times that will matter more in a serious relationship.

Distance doesn't matter to people who are wealthy enough or motivated enough, but that's not most of us.

Distance doesn't work. Short term, yes. But not on an ongoing basis. Who wants to hug a map?

I'm in a LDR, met him on this site! Going to visit him again beginning of December. We video chat every night and text during the day! I'm in love with him! Still don't know where we will end up but I enjoy every minute with him via video chat and face to face.

Of course it matters. It makes everything so much more difficult and costly. I like being able to call at any time and go for a drink, or a day out together.

It may be less consequential in an existing relationship, but in the initial stages I think it makes things far more difficult.

Maybe a long distance relationship will work for some couples. I'm looking for that special human to live no more than two hours from where I live.
For me is very important the frequency of the emotional and physical connection.

It matters to me. I need someone local.

There's distance, and then there's distance. And then there's DISTANCE.

I spent a couple months driving back and forth about 35 minutes (and she drove to my place too) while seeing/dating/getting to know/ spending the nights with someone last summer. It wasn't a hard drive, but I did get weary now and then of racing home to get ready for work after being together. I generally draw the line at an hour drive, but I would make an exception if it seems like someone is really connecting. I usually don't bother to reach out to someone farther away... but again, I make exceptions.

Knowing the relationship would be mostly texting and phoning can put a damper on it for most people.

Yes distance does matter. Being together matters and whatever prevents that is a problem. Other things that matter are working together under stress to see how each other responds to stressful situations, having some hobbies in common (but not necessarily everything).

I've never had a long-distance relationship, so I can't say.

@LiterateHiker, it seems you are doomed to a series of unfulfilling relationships, and it makes me sad.

You are lucky you are alive. I'm sorry you had that bad experience and terrible response.
Long distance relationships are extremely hard. I have been in one for a year and a half. He's in London and I'm in CA. I flew over there and met him. We hit it off. Now it is cooling. I don't know why. He seems to have a lot of health problems. He doesn't contact me as much. It's hard hugging just a pillow. I wouldn't recommend a LDR. Too many long gaps!

I think it can be done IF there was a prior, established commitment already and the two people needed distance due to jobs/work, medical treatment, to care for dying loved one(s), or whatever other reason.... it would suck and be lonesome, but once reunited, would be good.... on the other hand, starting from scratch from long distance is problematic imo. At that point, do you fall for the real person or the character they play or the fantasy or idea of the person you have in your head?? Some people can do it, I don't think I am one of em.

Long distance relationships can be a challenge. Things can look good on paper (or screen) and maybe even over the phone, but how do you solve the physical presence issue. I haven’t ruled out an LDR, but approach cautiously.

FYI, I don’t downhill ski, but have plenty of experience driving in snow. My Subie is part goat.

I don't do long distance. I've tried it a few times, but the reality is I won't move and there are few people willing or able to move for love. Getting to know each other is just too hard, to expensive, and just not practical.

I don't see a long distance relationship working for me. I live on a small island, so the farthest distance there can be is an hour away. I've done that twice, and it was kinda nice to have that space during days we didn't plan to be together!

Anywhere else is a costly airplane ride. I wouldn't want to spend that much time and money traveling a long distance to find out the guy is a jerk. I can save my time and money by just not dating. I'll continue to enjoy the activities I like on my own or with friends, until maybe I'll meet someone else who enjoys the same things, but conveniently close to me.

For anyone off island, visits would have to be pretty lengthy for us to get to know each other. I would probably only consider someone who would want to live on my island, or maybe someone who divides his time between Kauai and the Seattle area, since I do visit there often to visit with my family.

I have been in two LDRs. Both failed to soon. Distance was the culprit.

Distance does matter though some people seem to make it work. At our age we all have baggage and we all still have work to do. That said, I don't think it works to try to make anyone else change. Don't lower your standards and don't give up would be my suggestion. For myself, I'm hoping to someday find someone whose baggage makes a matched set with mine but I accept the possibility that I may never find someone with whom I am compatible in that way. And when it feels unsafe in any way, just say piss off!

men come in all flavours. To bad it took so long for you to recognise it. Advertisement: TRY ME OUT!
Have a great Xmas, Jerry

Said this before; chemistry is often disingenuous and appeals to ones emotions. Prefer to get to know someone first and then meet. Distance may be an impediment to some but it can and has been beneficial for me.

Its not close to ideal, but most of us let our ideals stop us from even trying. Weirdly enough, our ideals also make us believe that we can make shitty dating choices, and force them to work out if we try hard enough.

So in summary, stop having ideals, and just get to know someone. If you feel like thats doable at a distance, then theres no reason to hold back.