I find out you "went looking" on your wife, you may be a widower now, but I would Never trust you as far as I could throw you (and I doubt I could even pick you up). Stricly FWB, and that is only if you are unbelievably hot.
Been there, done that, (or I guess had it done to me), know better.

I only had to make that decision one and I left. I can't predict how I would act if the circumstances had been any different than they were. I hope I would still leave regardless. On the other hand I can't imagine ever leaving my husband of 38 years for any reason. I also can't imagine him ever cheating.

No, I could never trust him again.

unconditional love and faith are concepts you have IF you have a relationship. ( someone has an accident and goes into a coma and you have love and faith, a parent whose teen has gone astray but has love and faith they will get back on track as their child is their own creation built with all years they raised them.). Love and faith is the basis of a relationship, so if one person is looking elsewhere for it, it does not seem that it exisits. Walk away from this b.s. you deserve to be loved and adored equally.

No stupidity

What a gem of a man. [Yeah, that was sarcasm.] The girlfriend "stayed' with the man because she is trapped by a crippling physical illness/disability, and desperate. It sounds like she is trying to make the best of a horrific situation within the limitations inflicted on her, and is of the opinion that even a dirt bag is better than no man at all. My heart goes out to her. Good on you for doing the decent thing by cutting bait on him once you discovered what he is. You did yourself a favor, too, since any man who will cheat with you will also cheat on you. He has probably moved on to the next woman. When I caught my husband of 17 years having an affair, I demanded that he move out. It took him a month and a half to do so. That was torture. One can't turn off the love one feels like one can a light switch, but the realization that the relationship is doomed without trust is immediate. It was a very painful experience and the residual grief and bitterness, due to lack of closure, is still with me two and a half years later.

My family and marriage of 35 years is too important for "cheating" a few times to destroy our relationship. I hope she would tell me about it, avoid sneaking around and the cheating. I've not been through such a thing, and think she has been faithful. It would be difficult to manage my emotions, but in the long run, I know, I'd be OK.

The worst thing would be a divorce, and I've been through two, already. I came out OK then, Id be OK again. Although, I'd do almost anything to keep my family. Panicking is the wrong thing to do.

It's the end of trust and of the relationship for me.

No.. ..and I wouldn’t expected her to, either ~

Absolutely not... That would destroy any trust completely.. If he could cheat on the relationship, he could cheat on other things too...

I've seen it in couples where the male cheats and at other times where the female cheats. Generally speaking, males cheat because they can and females cheat because there is something missing in the primary relationship, but that is by no means a rule and I knew one woman who generally had 4 or 5 on the go, other than her husband, who lived in blissful ignorance most of the time. I've seen couples who regard it as an opportunity to grow and others who just pull the pin. The only constant I've seen in those that continue successfully is the degree of respect remaining between the couple.

There was a time when I would have said that cheating was a deal-breaker. My thoughts have changed since then.

These days, I would have far more interest in the reasons why it happened, and I would be much more open to considering whether I played a role in that. I would wonder whether it was primarily an emotional thing or a physical thing, I would wonder whether it was an ongoing thing, and I would be much less motivated by jealousy.

I’m in total agreement. I would always be suspicious that he was cheating and never be fully at peace in the relationship. Without trust, what is there? She must have very low self-esteem and not think she can do better.

Yes.

I have not stayed with anyone that has cheated. Luckily when I found out I did not love either, so of course it was way easier to do. I am glad you telling her worked out so well for you. I will never tell another woman she's being cheated on again.... biches be crazy. >:/

I would never stay in a relationship with a sig. other if I found out they cheated on me no matter how much I love them. Enough said.