I am somewhat melancholy. I have lost 3 friends this week, 2 most likely to covid 19, one that the jury is still out on.
I spoke with my son. He will still be getting married in September, but it looks like my ex and i will be the only guests. I realized when I told him that I had recovered from the trump virus, that I had not told him that I had it. I have always been fairly private with my medical stuff, and I didn't want to burden him with something he could do nothing about.
I've been listening to 70's rock and the nostalgia is overwhelming. Every song paints a picture. Some of love, some of rememberence, some of regret, but this is the first time in years that I have just been listening to the music and not doing 6 other things.
Probably losing 3 friends in one week justifies staying up all night listening to the music of my youth and feeling sad, but the sun will still rise in the morning and I had a night of listening to the Doors, Cream, Springstein, GFR, the Seekers, Grateful Dead, Led Zeplin and a ton of others of just the songs I wanted to hear.
That's my rant. I will survive and thrive.
I think these strange times, with the stakes so high in doing too many things without really focusing on each task is teaching us to really spend time enjoying the heck out of all the wondrous gifts we have, be it music, movies, books, podcasts, and various other contributions people have shared with the world. In the past, it may have all been background noise, but without so many other distractions, it's been kind of good to really reflect and absorb the heck out of all our experiences more fully than ever before.
I think the smaller weddings are an improvement over the large gatherings which often take away from the meaning of the ceremony and moment. It's hard to concentrate on the reality of what's really happening when everyone is concerned about pleasing all the guests, and of course the expense, etc. Best to have a small gathering of only a few people to witness the big moment in their life and celebrate on a smaller, more meaningful scale.
It is sad that we can't have large gatherings for funerals, as I think they are helpful to the grieving, but they are super spreader events, so best to keep them distant at this time. It is during these emotional times that we often need to feel a closeness - but we will have to learn to interact with others to help us grieve remotely. I think it's possible to do that temporarily at least.
I am so sorry to hear of the death of your friends, it’s tough to lose so many of them in such a close period of time. You are grieving, so be kind to yourself, and feel happy that you are a survivor and will be able to attend and help celebrate your son’s wedding, even though it will be a much reduced affair.
Music can help us through some really difficult times in our lives, the memories which are evoked by listening to the songs of our youth are particularly bittersweet when the friends we enjoyed these moments with are no longer with us. This is all part of you releasing emotions, and is healthy to do so, after a while the healing will start and you’ll be able to listen to this music again with fondness not sadness, and you’ll be able to smile at the good memories of times past with your old pals. I know you’re a survivor and you sound like you already know it yourself Glenn!
So sorry for your loss(es)
yes...you will survive...and it's more than ok to have those nostalgic moments. Makes one realize just how full our lives have been....and that we can make some bad decisions and overcome them. Make some good decisions and reap the benefits....in the end what I hope to have is a "mental slide show" that is rich and full and entertaining...some comedic (hopefully more) ....some sad (hopefully less) to keep me entertained when I've lost most of my marbles.