Yes you can be free. But you HAVE to engage in open and honest communication on an ongoing basis. The problem I have run in to in the past is FWBs not telling me about dating around (I'd want him to show me test results then) or them catching feelings and not telling me.

I think no party should ever demand exclusivity. That is some entitlement behaviour there. I think you open up a dialogue or discussion about exclusivity. If they are not open to that, you either continue your dynamic as it is OR you move on and end the FWBs since you have caught feelings and can no longer bear watching them date others. They are free to say no and you are free to say no to exclusivity and deal with the consequences of such an answer.

It's a perfect arrangement in my eyes. But I've yet to be able to make it work in reality. Both "experiments" ended up with them wanting to get married .... That's a WHOLE lot more than FWB !

I think the dynamics of FWB change a lot with age. For older people 50+ who own their own homes it can be preferable to have an exclusive FWB relationship. It makes things easier with kids, grandkids and inheritances. My 93 yo mother who has been widowed twice has had one for 30 years. When I asked her why they didn't marry or move in, she said she liked to be able to send him home when he's annoying. . Like mother like son I'm afraid.

What has happened to me the few times in that kind of relationship, is one of us met someone we were really interested in for a more serious relationship. If there had been the kind of chemistry that comes with those feelings they would have shown up at some point pretty quickly. I'm sure it does happen the other way too, it was just never my experience.

Yup

With friends with benefits, often one person becomes emotionally attached, usually the woman.

Oxytocin has been called the love hormone and the bonding hormone. Most women are flooded with oxytocin during orgasm. This is the same hormone that bonds us with our babies while breastfeeding.

During sex, oxytocin sends me sideways, makes me feel relationship-y. I have to keep my head straight.

Because of this, most women bond with their lover. But it is painful to love someone who is incapable of loving you in return.

Benefits? Suck as vacation time and sick leave? A 401K? Paid holidays? That would be a pretty awesome friend indeed.

I've had a friend with benefits and it just happened to be exclusive at the time. However, when each of us met other people, we discontinued it. Oh, if life was that simple today.

There are a lot of variables involved with that scenario, and I can see it working in most of them with the exception of the "best of" friends part. Friends, yes. Best of friends, no. I believe that would inevitably cause complications.

It depends on the people involved. Some people navigate FWB very easily, without exclusivity or jealousy, and other people find it challenging to separate the physical from the emotional. I think it's important to know oneself well and to keep open, honest communication with your beneficial friend. (For what it's worth, I know myself well enough to be confident that I'd catch feelings. For me, it just wouldn't work.)

As feelings develop, typically so do expectations — maybe for one party of the affair, perhaps for both.

Let me make it simple for you.

Every married and live-in couple is an FWB relationship. Let's not kid ourselves. A paper of marriage does not change it. What is worse is friends take each other for granted and are not good friends any more. Don't marry, just keep dating.

I sure like to try