What is the strangest thing ever said to you after
hearing you’re an atheist?
8
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“That’s y u don’t have a man , if u pray and believe , Jesus will find u a good man “.
I told her , Barbara , fuck the good man , I have lost my very expensive hair brush , it has been 2 days , and I look like a poodle already . What’s the odds Jesus will find that “?
And . I am not kidding , she said ,” for lost items and such I know a medium not far from here that can tell u where to find everything “.
And I was like , I am dead inside . Couldn’t even laugh .
All these 2 weeks ago
Pralina1
Level 9
Oct 25, 2020
12
that's freakin' hilarious.....
He never finds keys either. 
@Wildgreens He isn't much good for glasses either...Actually, I wouldn't know, I never SK HIM.
@Wildgreens u know , the key thing ? It doesn’t help if u walk up and down the house “ Jesus f christ where are my keys “
. I don’t think he likes that talk
That's a solid "Face-Palm"
Poodles are a good look, just sayin'. God might be givin you a hint making you lose that brush... 
“ So , you’re a devil worshiper then?” I answered, no I don’t believe in the devil anymore than I believe in a god. 
Redheadedgammy
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
11
I have heard that one, also.
I don't know how strange it is, but the response I've gotten most often has been, "...but you're so nice!"
LOL
KKGator
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
9
I get that too. They think atheists are the worst humans in history.
“You don’t act like an atheist.”
Made me wonder what “kind” of atheist they had in mind.
Willow_Wisp
Level 8
Oct 24, 2020
7
A non believer oh my.
According to my therapist she said I’m the best
“christian” that she knows. I reminded her you mean
atheist?
“So you don’t believe in God?”
Varn
Level 8
Oct 25, 2020
9
People don’t listen.
That’s the one I get too.
Followed by, evidence for god is EVERYWHERE! Look at the trees! Look at the sky!
Varn:
@BlizzardMan Yes! ...but then I get to dazzle them with science ..attempting to describe how they’re all related, to us
NOPE.
My oldest brother disowned me, telling me I was no longer his brother, and I must not try to contact him for any reason. Of course, he's still a Moron (oops, Mormon), the religion our parents raised us in.
BestWithoutGods
Level 8
Oct 24, 2020
8
Even if you win the lottery?
@Petter In that case, HE would contact ME. 
But christians are loving and caring about other humans right? Jesus sets the example.
@Wildgreens I agree that christians should be loving and caring. But you'd be surprised at how hateful Morons (oops, Mormons) can be. They used to be racists, and they're still sexists. And they teach their members not to trust non-Morons, which is why my brother disowned me, after I left Moronism.
My parents converted to Mormonism before I was born. However my oldest brother remembered their conversion, and when he got old enough he told them he didn't believe in it. So, I wasn't the first in my family to leave the Mormon church.
Of course when I told them I was atheist, It was at the same time I also told them I was gay. My plan to was to come out (as gay), but I didn't want to hear all the religious stuff they'd bring up, so I thought it was best to also let them know I was also an atheist.
I was surprised I wasn't disowned.
What ws difficult was havitgn my name removed from church records. They are very reluctant and it was about ten years from when i originaly requestested iot to when it finally happened. The Mormon churhc likes to brag about their growing membership, but as they coutn every person who was ever baptized whether or not they still believe, and they make it very difficult to have your name removed from their records, a large number of the membership they count aren't persons who consider themselves to still be members.
My Mom told me that I'm stupid for being one. She is one of the most uneducated people I know.
AtheismIsLife
Level 6
Oct 25, 2020
8
My parents just said they were very disappointed in me.
They don’t comprehend that its our choice. According to most religious parents they are the only ones that are always right.
Ken, a 66-year-old psychologist from Portland, Oregon. His first message to me:
"I really like your playful, creative, giving being. You're more "spiritual" than most religious people. I'm curious how an "atheist" can live that way."
My response after Skyping with him:
Ken,
Yesterday a man I used to date, Rich, dropped by as I was kneading four loaves of bread. With a master degree, Rich is highly intelligent and an atheist. Unlike you, Rich immediately saw the insult in your message.
I told Rich you could not understand how I can have loving kindness without attending church and believing in a god. "I get asked that by Christians all the time," Rich replied.
Treating people with kindness and respect is a series of daily choices. I don't need a book or fear of an invisible deity to teach me to behave. At age four, I realized when I am nice to people, they are nice in return.
I would never corner Christians and demand that they explain themselves. Yet you and your compatriots think this is acceptable behavior.
Christians who don't know me often demand, as you did, that I explain:
- Why I am an atheist.
- How the universe began (as if being an atheist automatically makes me an astrophysicist). "Nobody knows," I reply. "Science is advancing every year."
- What happens when people die. "Nobody knows," I reply.
- What is "spirituality."
You may think your questions were unique. They were not. Rich and I both find being grilled by Christians rude and tiresome.
LiterateHiker
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
9
Christians think that they have all of the answers don’t they?
I was once told that I act more like a Christian than most Christians
@JonnaBononna I would say that most atheists are more "moral" than most Christians... was measured by Christian teachings.
"Have fun in hell!" At least, it was the first time I heard it. A zillion times later, and it just seems lame and a little desperate.
Deb57
Level 8
Oct 24, 2020
6
Hell has all the good bands anyway.
@ThisIsPatrick LOL I know I listen to plenty of it!!
A good reply to that would be “Heavens afraid of me and Hells afraid I’m going to take over”
That oughta give ‘em some goosebumps. LOL
More desperate than anything else I would say.
My oldest brother's (now ex-) wife asked if it was because I was gay.
snytiger6
Level 9
Oct 25, 2020
7
Ignorance
You shoulda said: "Nah. If anything being gay should make me believe in and love God more. I mean...have you seen the abs on Jesus? And sporting only a loin cloth? Dude's in shape! He didnt let himself go, like Buddha did."
@MakeItGood I am more likely to question why Jesus is always depicted on the cross with a loin cloth. The Romans always crucified people who were totally naked.
@snytiger6 really? Didnt know that! And I thought it was strange that the the giant Buddha at a temple in my folks hometown was nude. And that statue was several stories tall, so you know the "package" was visible from a great distance lol.
I wonder if there are depictions of Jesus as he supposedly was on the cross in Europe...well, in countries that don't sexualize nudity as much as the US does...
@MakeItGood I remember visiting the Todaiji Temple in Japan. The Buddha there was pretty large Othre stories tall), but I remember it beign clothed
@snytiger6 heres the one i talking about
Then you think it is ok to commit murder. I should have answered, "you are right, I'm thinking about you".
GeorgeRocheleau
Level 8
Oct 25, 2020
8
If I come across that can I borrow that line?
That’s brilliant!!
I would have said "the exact opposite actually. If there is no god, no afterlife, all life becomes much more precious and valuable, don't you think?"
No you're not, you just want to sin!
LenHazell53
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
7
You said that like there was something wrong with it.
I've pretty much come to the conclusion that a lot of religious people are religious, just so they can feel the extra thrill and excitement of being "naughty" when they sin.
I'll point to Jerry Falwell Jr. as an example.
I don't get that response very often but when I do, I throw that BS right back at em. With - bible/god dictates what is sinning and what is moral so when we do what the bible tells us we are not sinning. (they agree). Then I'll bring up a few nasty bible quotes including Psalms 137:9 Happy is the one who takes your babies and smashes them against the rocks
According to JW’s (Jehovah’s Witnesses), anyone
that does not conform to their BS they are all mentally
diseased.
Wildgreens
Level 8
Oct 24, 2020
7
"You just THINK you don't believe...but you really DO!"
LucyLoohoo
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
6
@Fred_Snerd Actually, I thought it was ignorant and disrespectful.
So, do you worship the Devil then?
Sierra4
Level 8
Oct 24, 2020
6
Yea, so tell ‘em you do. Tell them you belong to a satanic cult and that you practice Black magic. This is a great way of dealing with these sorry naive clowns.
@SeaRay215ex
I just say no, it is part of the same story.
I was asked if I worshiped the devil and promoted
baby sacrifices. I said your god already did all of that. .
I can't have anything to do with you.
barjoe
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
6
So much for them being loving and kind.
But you have to believe in something. What do you believe in? As my mother had died that year followed by a friends baby being stillborn and another friend having a miscarriage, I pointed out that if I did believe in a god then he is a bastard and I will have nothing to do with him. Which would they prefer?
Budgie
Level 8
Oct 25, 2020
6
I've copped a few odd ones ( reactions) in my time.
One that I remember quite clearly went something like this, " You're an Atheist, a Nurse, a Mid-wife and you do NOT believe that your skills came to you as a gift from God, how can that be?"
Triphid
Level 9
Oct 24, 2020
6
That gift meaning having to go to school for it.
@Wildgreens Yes, back in those days, the early 70's it meant 6 weeks every year for 3 years spent in a Training School then the rest of the time in the Wards with hands on work rather than sitting at a desk in a University as they do these days.
For the first 12 months you could 100% certain that you'd cop every shitty job, and I do mean shitty btw, that came along plus, as a Trainee MALE nurse I was expected to do work that was reserved mainly for the Wardsmen/Portering Staff as well and was paid around $20 per week LESS than the female nurses of the same grade.
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