ATTRACTION DISTRACTION
What attributes in others are you drawn to even when the rest of their qualities should have you running for the hills? Bad boys/girls? Musician? Money? Accents? Artists? Cooking skills? Physique? What bad choices have you made?
In the spirit of full disclosure I should admit what qualities in a woman make me turn off my ability to think clearly. Any woman who works out seriously, ESPECIALLY if she's muscular, I can become emotionally clueless around. Been in more than one relationship with a muscular woman that went on too long. When I'm thinking clearer I only find women attractive if I like them. Don't care what they look like- if I don't like them they're not attractive to me.
I am almost invariably attracted to the interesting, which usually means the problematic. Borderline and Bipolar (and I visited her in the psych ward BEFORE we dated) ? Dated for a year, despite her promises of suicide and throwing items at me. Unemployed stoner? 9 months of learning what made her rely on my support. Multiple women who suppressed emotions? Sign me up to figure out that I could get through to their emotions just a bit before they dumped me.
I always want to know more, and I always find that it doesn't help.
Dude! Be careful. Sounds like a lot of drama. Must admit though I've been in more than my share of relationships where I thought I could 'fix' her.
It's a tough one. I tend to value a certain type of personality. Typically when reading someone's comments or introductory bio, you can get a peek into someone's character. I would ignore all" bad choices" in the profile if I like the self description. If I see wit, a healthy sense of humor, I just might start a conversation.
So what would be the "bad choices" you might ignore?
I guess I try to stay away from someone who's not very self-reflective, has an overly negative self-image, doesn't have a sense of humor, doesn't value education, right-wing politically, misogynists, homophobes, racists etc. That last one I've been encountering more and more lately; probably because of the current political climate and because I am a big bald white guy so people assume... I look for women with emotional intelligence, a good laugh and it would be nice if they liked cats!