Thanks for the warm welcome

There isn't much of a non-binary community here. Most of my trans friends are on the road to transition. Some at supercar speeds, others at a snail's pace, but all ultimately headed to that destination or already there.

@NicoleCadmium I get that. It's hard to stay in the middle, I'm finding a lot of people are very aggravated by it. They need to choose left or right, and not sit on the fence. I kinda like the fence right now.

@Peeves Yup. I still think a lot of people are trying to figure it out, and as @birdingnut says below, a lot of classically transgender (destined to be transsexual) people are very heavily invested in the binary. I like the flexibility that the non-binary options give, but they do get treated much as bisexuals often do by straight and gay people: othered from both sides - too much/not enough 'whatever' to be 'one of us.'

It's funny how this pans out. You finally reject the pressure to 'man up' only to find it replaced with different pressure to be a cliché of femininity.

Attached is my Facebook backdrop that I've been using for the last couple of years.

@NicoleCadmium Yes-many transgender people are fanatically invested in the gender binary, which I reject. I dress androgynously, but a female-bodied person is allowed to wear male clothing, although it doesn't go the other way.

Just keep fighting back. In Thailand, people can present as they wish, due to Thai Buddhism accepting a Third Gender.

@birdingnut A lot of it (in Western society, at least) is down to fear of the penis. Given that it can't be easily detached and locked away somewhere, it has to be kept under two layers of sturdy crotched clothing at all times. Penises are seen as rape weapons, while vaginas are considered benign.

You can cover a vagina in as few or as many layers of clothing as you like, and nobody's bothered as long as it's hidden from view. The only purpose of hiding it (and avoiding clothing that might suggest that it is easily accessible) being to avoid tempting people with penises to do things that are assumed to come naturally to them. "She was wearing a short skirt? Well she was asking for it then."

Secure a penis behind too few layers, and people start to get nervous. The assumption is that everyone who has one is only ever one momentary lapse of self control away from shoving it inside someone who doesn't want it. I don't have a predatory bone in my body. I have a very strong preference for the passive sexual role. Yet I'm still supposed to play by the 'two layers of sturdy crotched clothing' rule, because I'm still considered a potential rapist by virtue of being anatomically able to rape.