Yes, like Rachel Dolezal. [www-m.cnn.com]

@misternatureboy Claiming to be black when you're white is appropriation of an oppressed minority status. The day straight people are an oppressed minority, I'll have a problem with bisexual men considering themselves straight.

@NicoleCadmium Exactly.

i understand the need to self identify, but this suggests something more complicated. all the real answers are with the OP of the add. the person may not be comfortable with admitting they are bisexual, or this could be the only way they feel comfortable to indulge their desires for same sex contact.

@Arttoa And, there are cultures in which being gay is frowned upon, if not forbidden, so considering oneself MSM is a safer way to identify.

@NicoleCadmium I get that, but my issue with this person is the lying part. I understand being uncomfortable acknowledging that one is homosexual/bisexual, but there are less duplicitous ways to present oneself. I realize that I'm asking too much of this guy or he is probably in the early stages of his journey, but then again this thread got real serious.

@misternatureboy Years ago, I had a long, drawn out argument on Fetlife with a guy who claimed to be heterosexual, but to enjoy having sex with men. His reasoning was that his romantic interest was exclusively in women, and he was only interested in men for sex. What he actually was, was a heteroromantic bisexual. So just like about 90% of the bisexual men I've ever met in my life.

Arguing away, and demanding that he acknowledge his bisexuality, I had a bit of a penny drop moment. It was obviously important to him to think of himself as straight. What skin was it off my nose to allow him to do that? So I stopped challenging him.

I think most people confuse attraction with core sexuality. Which is understandable, since the two work in parallel until people start breaking the gender rules. There are plenty of men who are not conventionally gay, in the sense that they wouldn't go near someone presenting as masculine, but they're happy to encounter a penis, as long as it's in the right (feminine) wrapping paper. What we commonly accept as sexuality has become two separate things: mechanical interest (asexual, bisexual, heterosexual, homosexual) and gender based attraction (gay, pan, straight.) Though, to be honest, the image at the top of the page sounds like "straight, with a cock fetish" to me. And this is very, very common: bisexual men who treat their homosexual interests purely as a kink.

I still have a particular problem with T-Girls (social transvestites) pulling on stockings, grinding their boy bits against and into each other, and claiming to be lesbians. This is both appropriation of lesbianism, and (male) homophobia. "We love the nice, sexy, desirable, 'ladygay', but we'll have none of that disgusting, horrible, undesirable 'mangay' stuff, thank you very much."

So yes, these days I add a caveat to self-identification, in that it should be challenged if it amounts to appropriation of a disadvantaged minority. Yes, this guy's clearly in denial, but that's his right. If he needs that in order to cope with his sexuality, then society's homophobia and biphobia are really to blame, here.