It happens to many people for me it was my mother, very sad but she made my life miserable for 18 years and my dad's for many more.

My first thought is for your children who, regardless of their relationship with their father at the time, may experience at some future period, a range of emotions. The term 'closure' is, in my opinion, a fallacy. Finality never fully occurs, and the so-called term of 'closure' is not actually achievable. Events and circumstances that we've processed and worked through have a sinister way of resurrecting themselves. No matter the hours (and dollars) spent in therapy and counseling, we remain capable of revisiting the past and replaying those hours in our minds.

Go Immediately, with proof of marriage plus death certificate, to your local Social Security Office! You may be entitled to a huge raise in your SS if he made generally more than you in his lifetime. It is not paid retroactively, so go Now! My friend got a $628/month raise when her ex passed!

Still, it's gotta come as a shock. Hope you're doing alright.

Sounds as though the world is now a slightly better place, and you all know it. Continue forward, together ~

I guess he found it more important to be "right" than happy ...