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WHO'S WHO IN HELL

Why are so many interesting, intelligent, talented and just plain cool people in Hell? Could it be that the combination of these gifts grants the insight to see religion for the bullshit that it is? Let's take a less than comprehensive headcount of who's currently burning in Hell based on the biblical requirements for achieving salvation. None of these folks met that criteria.

This is mostly off the top of my head so please feel free to add to this list and keep it going.

  • George Carlin
  • Christopher Hitchens
  • Mark Twain
  • George Washington
  • Thomas Jefferson
  • Benjamin Franklin
  • Teddy Roosevelt .......... (Look at all these Presidents, Founding Fathers, and Framers of the Constitution. None of them would be elected for anything today)
  • James Madison
  • John Adams
  • Ulysses S. Grant
  • Abraham Lincoln
  • Susan B. Anthony
  • Charles Darwin.......... (Of course)
  • Albert Einstein.......... (He was smart enough to work out the complexities of the Universe from a patent office, I'm sure he could figure out the God myth)
  • John Lennon
  • Bruce Lee ............... (Like he couldn't kick Satan's ass if he wanted to)
  • Frank Zappa
  • Charlie Chaplin
  • Stanley Kubrick
  • Thomas Edison
  • Kurt Vonnegut
  • Helen Keller ............ (Helen Keller!!)
  • Douglas Adams
  • Rodney Dangerfield
  • Ernest Hemingway
  • Gene Roddenberry
  • Andy Rooney
  • Isaac Asimov
  • HP Lovecraft
  • Pat Tillman
  • Edgar Allen Poe
  • Carl Sagan
  • Friedrich Nietzsche
  • Frank Lloyd Wright
  • Sigmund Freud
  • Confucius
  • HG Wells
  • Alfred Hitchcock
  • Oskar Schindler .......... (Yes, that one. Born and raised Catholic but didn't practice the faith. His wife was quoted as having stated "He was not a believer." )
  • Gene Kelly
  • William M. Gaines .......... (Founded MAD magazine. He should be a saint)
  • Charles M. Schulz
  • George C. Scott
  • George Orwell
  • Katherine Hepburn
  • Howard Hughes .......... (Crazy as he was even he thought god was bullshit)
  • Andrew Carnegie
  • Leonardo DaVinci

And finally...

Wait for it...

  • L. Ron Hubbard .......... (Yes, the creator of Scientology was an avowed atheist. He created a religion to make money. Gotta love that.)
Sgt_Spanky 8 Aug 8
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25 comments

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7

Kind of hard to go to hell when It's a fabrication.

3

Even with all of God's over the top marketing, Satan still attracts the best people.

3

Waste of time making lists or even thinking of all the smart people who rejected the notion of heaven or hell. Just enjoy life to the full , knowing you were in good company, and that when life ends there will be no everlasting anything.

3

The Mormons have probably baptized them all post-mortem....so Gawd forgave them, because Mormons have that power, and they are all floating on clouds now and playing harps....

Well, actually, the Mormon afterlife has 3 stages of "heaven" & none of them are the traditional "pearly gates" & instead the highest is about being a God on your own planet. The thing of it is, all of that's reserved for after the return of Christ & 1000 years of paradise on earth & in the meantime Mormons continue to proselytize in the spirit world in a never-ending attempt to save souls from "outer darkness", not the hell as we know it from medieval folklore.

@Jdkglobal What about the virgins? Do I get them on my own planet? Wait a minute, I think that I'm in the wrong part of heaven with this. And I'm even gonna get door knockers after I'm dead?

2

What kills me about L.Ron and Scientology is he told them he was doing it to make money. That it was a load of crap and yet here they are...

Boggles the mind.

There is simply no limit to how stupid religion makes people. Either that, or it appeals mostly to stupid and/or intellectually lazy people. Something has to account for the ignorance they so openly display.

I would have thought it would be obvious from the way Scientology resembles the sci-fi he also used to write. Dianetics was a cool idea, he should have just left it at that rather than trying to turn it into a religion.

@Denker I just can't wrap my mind around how it became a religion or whatever they want to call it. He told them it was a money making scam. Told them. Ouch. I think I gave myself a headache again.

@Sgt_Spanky It must because damn...

2

You don't have to feel bad they're not in hell they're just dead remember Hell doesn't exist

2

Nobody is in "Hell" because it doesn't exist! They are in our memories, period.

2

I like your list but cannot go along with "who's who in hell." The current Evangelicals are wrong in biblical belief, mostly because they do not study it and also because of a strong fear of death. There is nobody currently in the biblical hell. Nobody at all. That place is for a future time. Nobody dies and is instantly in heaven or hell. Current believers of this nonsense are trying to avoid fear of death in any way possible. We simply cannot have a devil figure who is lord of hell and at the same time he roams the earth "seeking whom he may devour." If this being has the ability to pop in and out of hell how would it be said that he is "in hell?" Rather than being punished he might be god's buddy.

People just keep on making this shit up. They do not read and study their book. There was a time that I read and studied their book and I've seen belief change drastically in my lifetime.

Isn't he also chained up in a pit somewhere as well. Since we're entertaining this myth.

@Electro68 Revelation 20:1-2. Chained for a thousand years but again it is a future time. What makes the entire biblical myth ridiculous is that we have 66 books joined together to make a story and none of those books were written with plans of being bound together that way. Christians forget this coz they have to know all, and they have to have a story. It's all made up!

@DenoPenno well said

2

"Heaven must be an awfully dull place if the poor in spirit live there."

Emma Goldman

2

Since I’m sure I’ll be going there too: I not only know a shortcut, but I’ve rented a bus, in case any of ya’ll want a ride. Lol. ?

Reserve a seat for me, please.

1

Let's not forget Woody Allen. From his book Side Effects: Not only is there no God, but try to find a plumber on weekends.

1

Hell sounds like a more interesting place than heaven. Don't think I could afford the A/C though.

godef Level 7 Aug 9, 2018
1

To all the people stating that hell isn't real, that's obvious and I assume understood. This is just to point out the quality of people religion would reject as unworthy of heaven because they didn't meet the criteria for entry by accepting the bullshit "sacrifice" of Jebus or belief in his magical daddy.

1

My Sociology professor once told us that Mark Twain said he didn't want to go Heaven because he wouldn't know anybody there. At least this list suggests he'd be in agreeable company!

1

I get the humor in this, it's funny. L Ron Hubbard..lmao

L. Ron! :: shakes my fist in general annoyance at him::

1

No such thing as hell..

1

Not too many women in that list...

Still looking for skirt, even in a pool of fire?
That's my idea of an optimist.

@Gareth lol

0

I told my ex wife hell sounded more fun than heaven. I said what with all the fun people there it sounded like a party and that heaven was a bunch of souls praying. She said no, hell fellates livestock

0

Cross all the jews off the list. According to the christian version of that book, they get a free pass.

0

I went to catholic school and one day I asked, "What do you eat when you are in heaven." The answer given by the nun was, "You get the grace of god." I later asked who else would be in heaven, the answer I do not remember but since I was not able to find grace in the store and I did not like the people said to be in heaven so I figured hell was the better place for me. At least the people who I was told would be there would be intelligent and interesting.

0

I think a bad translation has persisted over time so that Hell now means it's a bad place to be. I rather fancy Hell actually means, this IS the place to be if you have half a brain and a grain of common sense.
And using biblical criteria does anybody make it to heaven, as I recall the bar is set so high that god now says he lost his keys 'cos even he can't get in lol

0

One of our writers actually visited Hell. Here is his take on it. [ruthlessreviews.com]

Back in the days when I was more Agnostic than Atheist, I would admit to my friends "I could be wrong." I could imagine waking up dead one day and seeing a demon with horns, a tail, and a clipboard. "We've been expecting you, sir. Our features today are rats eating your eyes or being dipped upside down in a vat of shit. Which would you prefer?"

0

While I agree with your post. According to "bible" scholars Hell is considering a place of torment. Not necessarily fire. The lake of fire is where all liars go. (Aka.everybody)lol.

What will happen when trump gets there? Grease fire?

0

Bill Hicks
James Cullinan
John Lennon

Lennon was already on my list.

@Sgt_Spanky

Sorry Pal..missed that. ✔

0

Helen Keller, really?

She was a smart woman.

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