Grateful for this post because I realized I have been doing that.."Honey" to the developmentally disabled where i work and I know it's wrong, it just comes of my mouth because I find the clients so endearing and when we talk I smile and say "oh Honey". Note to self: address by name only. It's insulting - even if they are or not insulted.

Damn, I'm old!! When I was growing up, it was common practice and common coutesy to start a message to anybody...stranger or friend.... with "Dear so and so"....I wouldn't be too offended by "Dear".

Should we assume you are commenting about messages from men?
If so, then there is the answer. These are just men. And for some reason all their mothers' attempted to teach them about being polite and nice and reasonable and relevant did not take. The reason is they are men.
Men are women are very different. Women know this, but they keep attempting to demand from men what they cannot do. A few can be trained. But it takes years. I am a living example.
Wish i knew all about it 50 years ago.
Mister Pease provides some important insight:
"Why men don’t listen and women can’t read maps"
[vimeo.com]

I am amused when women younger than me call me "Hon," at the local delis, and stores,...
This happens more when the women are from farther south than michigan.

And, oh yeah, I am a total pushover for women who wear big glasses and remind me of librarians. And then curly hair! How much better can this get?

So, "Hey! Nice glasses."

But sweetie, it isn't the end of the world.

I don't like it from strangers, especially men, but it's OK with people I'm familiar with, like in a local shop I may frequent often. And senior citizens lol they can't help it!

I just ignore them....no annoyance. They are wanting a response so don’t give it.

That's what the "block" button is for...

Depending on what is said, I take a step back. Metaphorically. Way too familiar if I don't know you.

Seriously, I hate that crap. Overly familiar & condescending. If you don't know me, picking a random moniker to apply to me is pretty much the death of any continuing conversation.

you are not alone. it happens a lot in scam-spam. "dear (no name!)" or "my dear" -- the people perpetrating the scam are so stupid, they think because our letters begin with "dear" we like actual terms of endearment from strangers. that is a bit different of course from what you describe. that's accidental familiarity and what you describe is purposeful, invasive and at best cheeky. i don't tolerate it.

g

yea i HATE that shit!!

Some places , some cultures , it's common . Not here . When I received mail from someone I've never had any direct contact with before , that starts out Dear , it makes me suspicious .

It never happens to me.

Now "hey dipshit,..." is a different story.

I keep reading this type of comments and I wonder what that would be like..... no dear sweetie sexy for me regardless ????? ( full disclosure, I don't really care...I am hunting points all the time, gotta keep up with the pace...level 10 before I die, ain't gonna live forever)