My 12 year old granddaughter came to me this morning and said she is not sure about jesus because the evidence isn't there. She has been searching for it she says and wants to believe.
My first thought was my daughter was gonna blame me but then I remembered that she herself said that this particular child was the one most likely to stop believing because " she is like you and into science and stuff"
Her oldest has not been a believer since he was a teen but that is due more to being raised by his father who is from Eastern Europe.
Makes a grandma proud LOL
4
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My middle child once informed me that their mom & I divorced because I was an atheist and was genuinely upset about it. They're now an atheist and much more vocal about it.
chalupacabre
Level 8
Oct 25, 2018
1
My daughter wanted to believe. So I took her to church, No kidding. I would have discussions about what was real and how w would make that determination. I never discouraged her at all. I did encourage her to think about it. I encouraged her to think about how she would know what religion was more correct or did worship an actual god. One day I asked her if she wanted to go to church as she had been doing and she said no. She never asked to go again. I pretty much used a SE approach and encouraged her to figure it out for herself. She tells me now that she likes the idea of god but is not convinced there is a god.
DavidLaDeau
Level 8
Oct 25, 2018
2
My children went to church with their friends on other relatives. My daughter claims to be a christian but some of the things she says indicates to me that she is soooooooooo close to being at least agnostic
i can't help wondering why someone would NOT be "into science and stuff"! anyway mazel tov.
i can understand why a kid might want to believe; kids get upset when they learn santa claus doesn't exist; imagine their discomfort when they find out god doesn't either! but she sounds smart and especially with your help she will get over it and grow up to be a happy atheist 
)
g
genessa
Level 8
Oct 24, 2018
1
I'd ask her why she wants to believe. Why is that important to her. And then I would seek to reduce her needless angst around the topic. It might for example be a desire to not be an outlier, possibly based on an overdetermined concern about what that entails. You might be better off in that event to address her social concerns as she wouldn't actually have religious ones.
mordant
Level 8
Oct 24, 2018
1
Her mother and I have an agreement: I do not have to hide my lack of believe but I am not to try to deconvert them either. I'm always hesitant to discuss it when my daughter isn't around to hear what I actually say.
And I was surprised. The last time religion was discussed with this child was a few years ago when she expressed concern that I would go to hell. She was really worried about it.
Personally I think the fact that her friends and her mother are believers is why she wants to believe but she also is a child that does not dress like her friends do, doesn't watch all the same media they do, and is most definitely into science whereas nearly all of her friends dislike it.
I am glad your grand daughter has someone that she can talk openly with about these things. My mother was a bit of a fanatic about religion when I was young. I didn't really have anyone to discuss atheism until after I'd left home.
MichaelannD
Level 4
Oct 24, 2018
6
Yeah I really enjoy discussing that topic with my grandchildren. Fortunately for them however their parents are unbelievers. Still ... it helps for them to understand that their parents aren't just weird or something, because they live in the Bible Belt and probably get opposite messages from practically everywhere outside their family.
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