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28 7

Gotta love it when your religious parents give you this as a 20 year old... lovely.
Anyway so I thought it’d be a good idea to post how stupid this is because relationships, dating, and marriage is not the same as today compared to when the Bible was written. I also wanted to post this to open up a conversation.
Please comment below with your non religious/ atheist dating advice. If you’re not dating then comment something you wish you knew while you were dating.

chlorine413 6 May 27
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28 comments

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0

...my 3sisters received a similar book in high school(catholic).After they were happily married they joked about it(30 somethings).
Their critique was it saw they dater's responsibility to society the community the church. NOT EACH OTHER. Humans have
to experience an exploration of themselves and others(notably the opposite sex) before
they understand what they want and who they would be compatable with::there is no short cut-when dating at any age the process will involve a level of questioning reminiscent of
a job interview,but with emotions/&hormones.
Saying I don't know (or hypothetical questions)are beneficial. Be honest;patient;
and try to enjoy(create) a PROCESS of learning for BOTH, trying to keep pressure
at a minimum. Good post!!

18

Never confuse sex and love.

There is nothing wrong with having as much sex as you please.
Just always be sure you are protecting yourself as much as you possibly can.

Don't allow anyone to make you feel "less than".

Don't change who you are to please anyone else.

You ARE "enough". If someone else doesn't see your worth, they are unworthy of you.

There is NOTHING wrong with being single.
There is NOTHING wrong with not being interested in marriage.
There is NOTHING wrong with deciding you aren't interested in becoming a parent.

You do NOT have to do whatever society or anyone else says you "have" to do.
Be true to yourself.
Be bold.
Be brave.
Be kind.

Love this ❤️

12

If you've gone down on him three times and he hasn't returned the favour, dump him.

If he'll cheat on someone else to be with you, he'll cheat on you to be with someone else.

Always have an escape route.

9

Does it mention using quality rubbers?

godef Level 7 May 27, 2019
8

I am curious what the "Risk Quiz" is. Speaking of Risk, if I had it to do all over again I would give more attention to my own instincts, trust them, and pay less attention to what was expected of me. My marriage was fine for the first 12 years. However, the signs of my husband's alcoholism should have be addressed and dealt with much earlier. I sometimes regret not giving him the ultimatum earlier in our relationship. My tendency to make excuses for him was not healthy. So, for advice, if you see addictive behavior or mental health issues early on in a relationship, make sure to seek the help that is out there, for your partner, for yourself.

I didn't seek help for my mental illness until I lost the only good person in my life. It's the only regret that I have.

6

Anyone else think it's ironic that advice from the Bible is just above breaking up?

6

Well, it probably will make a good door-stop.

6

I'm the mom of three adult daughters. The girls were brought up going to church, youth group, summer camps and all that. Well, just because I was an xian, I didn't turn my brains off. As soon as I thought there was a chance they were going to be sexually active I got them on birth control pills. In theory (at least what we told dad) was that it was to regulate their periods/cramps/heavy flow. So my advice to you is protect yourself. Babies are wonderful but they suck the energy right out of you. Go out, have fun, try new things, but don't bring home any life changing souvenirs. Know your potential partner, do they have any STDs? Will he use condoms? I am so thankful that I was young and dumb before the explosion of STDs.

@linxminx their dad bought it, or rather shut up about it, and in was in part true for at least one of them. I also had dysmenorrhea prior to having kids. I was a proponent of BCP as soon as they started to show interest in boys. I didn't want babies having babies. Their dad did not have sisters, and his mom did not talk about women's stuff, so he had no real clue and didn't want to know. He only knew with 4 females in the house the odds were that every week would be estrogen central for one of them.

5

have fun. live in the moment. avoid endless thoughts of marriage...

I was going to put EXACTLY that

5

You should see the book I got on menstrual periods - rofl.... I think my book may be worse - though it covered all the religious beliefs that surround menstruation.... so pretty whacky. (It wasn't a religious book though).

I was still confused after reading it if you can believe that.

"Thou shalt not bleed on the Sabbath"?

Back in the day , anything that was remotely related to sex , was explained in a way that only those who already knew the information , would understand what was written . Those who didn't know were left in the dark .

@Cast1es Which is why I hadn't one friggin' clue about sexual intercourse.

I've yelled at my two older sisters about that btw. At 8 and 12 years older they could have taken a half hour out of their lives and filled me in.

@altschmerz okay it went better then that!

@Kafirah Sabbath Bloody Sabbath!

@MST3K whether they like it or not!

5

Who can take advice from a book with a flip phone on the cover?

I got a book . long before mobile phones were even invented .

@Cast1es on a Kindle?

@Cast1es Moddess used to print a pamphlet. But books? I didnt know other folks got those! Lol

5

Well with 39 years of dating experience, I'm writing my book that my friends have been clamoring for. It will be called "It Just Doesn't Matter." You can follow all the b.s. rules you want, it doesnt matter. You either click or you dont. My best example: Downtown roof top bar, wall to wall people. I see a woman at the bar and tell my friends I have to get to her. I wade through all the people, get to her and say, "You don't know what I had to do to get here." She replied, "Well I liked your arrival now let's see your departure." Moral: I could have been a babbling idiot and if she wanted to talk to me she would have, and I could have been the most erudite person in the world and if she didn't want to talk to me she wasn't going to. For those who will insist that she was basing it all on looks and that maybe she was shallow, here's another example. I was talking to a woman I have known for about 45 years, I made a joke and she said she remembered I had always been a comedian. I said "anything to keep a smile on that pretty face." Her reply, "Oh boy..." I said, "too much?" She said, "kinda syrupy." On the other hand, a guy tells a woman she's beautiful and he's says, "too strong?" She says, "Never." One wanted the attention, the other didn't, you can't win--"it just doesn't matter."

lerlo Level 8 May 27, 2019

I have often thought how self help books are useless unless everyone reads them. If you are the only one reading a particular book, you are the only one who knows the rules.

Men do not expect ll of their buddies to be exactly the same . Why do men expect all women to be the same ? The fact is women are exactly like men . Each one is different from all the others .

4

Oh, come on. In that book you're bound to find such advise as how to seduce your father-in-law by posing as a prostitute and other such gems. Or did they forget to include that in the book?

4

Some people can be so misguided. . . . Atleast you grew past it.

4

Advice from the bible. LOL How did God do that again? That's where I would turn for advice 🙂

4

This is absurd! It doesn't seem to have applied much in bible daze. It certainly cannot apply in the daze we are in today.

That’s my point exactly! It’s like me comparing tv from the 1950s to now; they aren’t even in the same ball park.
I actually did read it and some of it is actually good advice but they treat it as the Bible is the only source where you can get this knowledge.

4

Be honest, sincere and enjoy the experience.

3

I guess I am one of the lucky few. Born in 1980 to religious parents, went to church as a kid. Was only ever sent to private catholic school up until graduation. Came out as an atheist to my parents at age 13. They let me do my own thing, didn't force me to go to church, they just let me be me.

They didn't even say anything at all and were okay with me being the only person in my class who didn't do confirmation my junior year.

I hear horror stories all the time about religious parents. Stuff like this reminds me how lucky I was as a kid.

You are one of the lucky ones. Religion made my parents my living hell.

3

OMG: "Is his/her taste in music and clothing acceptable?" And it sites this as the scriptural reference:

Galatians 5:16-18
God’s Spirit and Our Own Desires

"16 If you are guided by the Spirit, you won’t obey your selfish desires. 17 The Spirit and your desires are enemies of each other..."

The bible is repulsive and moreso are those that would would point people to this verse in the context of dating...

3

I wish I knew that men will say Anything to get sex......

Speak that truth! 👍

3

Shit I’m going to order that just to take the quiz!

3

Rather like shutting the barn door after the horses have already gone out .

3

Nightmare book need a lot of therapy after that

bobwjr Level 10 May 27, 2019

Prefer joy of sex if still in print

3

Aim to make friends.. don't pick types listen observe and filter those who you can bring closer in your life. Aside vein that. Be free in your choices and open minded to what could come your way.. eventually you'll find what you're looking for without searching

Neenz Level 7 May 27, 2019

Cool~

2

I thought that the flip phone was unique.

1

I actually think it could be interesting to read it. So many people are very confused

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