I'm interested in getting opinions on the places in which you live. Do you love it or hate it? Do you wished you lived somewhere else or do you live in your Fantasy Paradise? If you don't like where you live, where would you move?
Great question! I love reading the detailed responses. They reveal so much about each responder, what they value and how their attitude towards life impacts their relationship with their place.
I’m particularly interested in this topic, being nomadic at this point. I really have no clue where I might settle eventually, or whether I will. This special connection with place has become fleeting and ephemeral for me, and I’m not certain I like that... seems our sense of self is keyed into where we are in some deep way, or it can be. I’m wondering whether it should be, as part of a healthy life.
Come to Liverpool for this. There will be a place for you to stay.
[africaoye.com]
Joni, You've been through a devastating loss. When you're ready to put down roots again, you'll know.
Where I live is kind if a mixed bag for me. I'm limited by finances and health reasons, so right now I live with my dad in the area I grew up in. What I do like best is its proximity to NYC and the culture and diversity I can find there; I lived there for a while some years back and I'm probably one of the very few people in New Jersey (who I've encountered, at any rate) who feels equally comfortable in both New York City and the New Jersey suburbs... Though I'm really not a fan of the suburbs per se, everything is very homogeneous. I do find pockets of diversity, older downtowns and areas where there are more artists and creative people, and try to gravitate there... All this being said, I'd love to move back to NYC, but the cost of living is of course through the roof. It's that diversity and variety that I appreciate the most.
@Sam-a-Lamb When I go to NYC, I try to stay as far away from the congested areas as I can. There are pockets and neighborhoods that are still quirky and have a quieter energy and you can even find some good cheap eats, that don't attract a lot of tourists. That saves it for me; otherwise I probably wouldn't go as much.
I live in a rural area on a dirt road and I hate it. I was raised outside of society and am awkward in general with people. I figured it was best since .. less people.
Not true. It is much easier for a counter cultural, socially challenged mess to blend in and even mingle in a city with masses of different types of people to get lost in. It has become an obsession since 2016 what a bunch of bigots I live around. Its even scary for my sometimes because they are all shooting their guns off on their properties nearly every day.
It also sucks that there are few jobs and zero public transportation. If I choose to work close to home I work with rural folks. I've learned I get on much better in a larger workplace in the city but If I drive there I'm putting extra miles on my car which I am dependent on not breaking. I have a cheap mortgage though, and the school is decent. If my daughter wasn't so involved in the band I might find a way to afford leaving.
I'm could be overexagerating or putting blame on my surroundings that is mine alone but Im pretty sure living in rural Michigan is my biggest regret in life.
My ideal would be a big city where I didn't need a car and could see a variety of interesting people and places.
@Sam-a-Lamb I literally grew up in tents and then in an area similar to this one. A big city would be nice, like NYC, or one with lots of Liberal minded people like Portland. Mostly want someplace walkable with public transportation. Nearby Grand Rapids is neither but even that would be better than here. I would love to live in an apartment and not have to deal with the house and property anymore but even the most reasonable are triple my mortgage. It's just not doable right now.
@MsAl I love the ARTPRIZE in Grand Rapids...I walked around for hours! They also have a great airport. My sister lives in Kalamazoo...if it weren't for the cold, I would live there...there is so much to do there and I found a lot of diversity there...with all of the good food that comes with diversity.
@thinktwice Art Prize is nice, and its definitely changed the look of the city especially with some of the permanent installations. I really wish there were better public transportation. Currently if you work before 8am or late in the evening you are about of luck bus wise. That cuts out most healthcare, restaurants, retail and factories..
@MsAl Yes, that is an issue in some of the nicest cities I have visited...transportation...when I move, I am looking for a walkable neighborhood...one with small shops, a health food store and market, a yarn shop, etc. I would prefer not to have to drive everywhere....
The Cincinnati area is pretty great. We get all four seasons. People here are nice. We have a few pro sports teams. The job market is good. Housing isn’t too expensive. Plus we have a McDonalds.
I live next door to a maccies. I never use it
@Sam-a-Lamb I actually live in Kentucky just across the river from downtown Cincy. I like the state a lot. We have the world’s largest cave and gold reserve here. We keep trying for world’s largest people, but Texas keeps taking that prize every year.
I like the Des Moines area of Iowa because there is a lot to do and the cost of living is affordable as well as the traffic not being that bad and crime also not bad either. There is a Unitarian church in the area too if I ever get motivated enough to return to it. The whole problem with living here is that it's very hard to find someone my age to date since almost everyone is Christian, family-oriented, and not many hipsters my age. There are many hipsters in this area if I was young, but not many at my age, so I will probably be alone. If I were younger and not so dependent on my friends while widowed, I would probably move to Portland, OR.
I love the travel writings of Bill Bryson. A fellow Des Moinesian
T-shirts saying "We`ve been to Des Moines and ridden the escalator"
@Sam-a-Lamb I'm not going to move there on my own with no friends who are already there. Not doing an LD relationship either. So here I am feeling trapped and way more alone than I want to feel.
@Sam-a-Lamb I don't know man, but I appreciate your encouragement and support. Today I signed up as a paid member on Our Time to supplement my useless, at least for the last few months, subscription to Match. They are owned by the same company and OT seems to be lower quality than when I was on it two years ago. Maybe that's why their price is lower than Match. OT has changed a lot with their profiles, cutting the essay parts of it way down, so you don't get near as much info about the person from reading their profile as you do on Match. And a lot of the same women in my area are on both sites now, probably with some of them having free memberships to keep the female numbers up.
But I joined it because Match seems to be running out of women in their 60s in my area and that's the main age group that seems willing to date someone my age, so I will try it for 6 mos.
@TomMcGiverin My 60 year old brother met a wonderful woman using My Time...good luck! Keep an open mind...I really did not have high hopes for him (married 5 times)...but it seems for every pot, there really is a lid!
@thinktwice My track record is a hell of a lot better than his, but, like I've said before on these boards, that doesn't seem to count for much with most women in online dating.
@thinktwice, @Sam-a-Lamb Not worth the risk of failure and the resulting crisis of not having friends around to support me.
@TomMcGiverin My husband and I have moved a few times to places where we don't know anybody, including this time, moving to NC. I have him at least, but it is scary and exciting at the same time. It seems that when you put yourself out there to all possibilities, people find you...I am hoping...good luck to you...as always, my door is always welcome to like minded strangers to visit!
I live in south Liverpool. I don't think that I would like to live anywhere else. But let me tell you why I moved here 1st.
It was about 25 years ago, not long after my divorce. I met a guy in a bar and stuck up a friendship. We went back to his and I lent him some money. The next weekend I tried to find his flat. I knew the number, not the building so I looked around for something familiar. As I wandered through the park I saw a young woman on her own under a tree reading a book. Several things struck me; a. on her own, b, reading a book, c, it did not have a flower on the cover. I said to myself "I want to live here".
I have not been disappointed. It is multi-cultural, bohemian and left wing. Sure it has problems with crime like most cities but it has scoucers too and we won't ever let you walk alone.
Btw if anyone would like to come for this festival PM me.
[africaoye.com]
Sounds like a city with character. The festival sounds great, but a bit far for my RV ...
I currently live near Hershey, PA. Too cold, too expensive, too religious.
I am moving to Wilmington, NC.
I love the beach, good medical, good music and art (top reason), not super expensive, airport, college, a pocket of blue in a mostly red state, off beat people welcomed.
Yes, but you have all that chocolate! (sorry, I bet you hear that a lot)
@bleurowz yeah...and I hate peanut butter...so no Reeses for me...lol
@Sam-a-Lamb My husband is a professional drummer so he has to be in communities where he will have the opportunity for form a band and open his small studio. I have to have a gallery or place to show my artwork. We need that energy as well...Asheville is too cold and too expensive...Lancaster is getting more urban, but it is still religious...Amish...I have looked at a lot of places...if Wilmington does not work out, well, I have no clue what we will do...
@thinktwice Would you consider Austin? Or Boulder?Maybe Arkansas?
@Justjoni Austin used to be hip a few years ago...Austin City Limits era...I would never live in Texas, though...I just have a bad taste for Texas because of the Bush era...Boulder...eh...too cold...My sister lived in Fort Collins...beautiful state and I think it is cool that weed is legal, but I forsee problems down the road and as a retiree, I don't want to deal with that...Arkansas...again, beautiful...but I need the ocean...salt water, waves, etc. None of these cities have that...
Everywhere I live, I can list some good things and some bad things. At present, I'm in Baveno, Italy.
GOOD THINGS ABOUT BAVENO:
It's on the lakeshore at the foot of the Alps, where the views are beautiful.
There is much to sightsee in Baveno and nearby, especially the Borromeo Islands.
The architecture and art in Baveno are fantastic.
There is a mountain going up from the lake, which is a nice place to hike and get away from people.
The Italian cuisine is absolutely delicious.
I'm out of the USA news loop. I don't have to see or hear the Fake President while I'm here.
BAD THINGS ABOUT BAVENO:
Too many people smoke in public, giving me bronchitis.
There are too many diesel engines, also giving me bronchitis.
The people don't seem to care about making noise, so there is too much noise for my sensative ears.
The cuisine is fattening, and I gain weight every time I come to Italy.
I am still learning Italian, so the process of communicating with the people is a challenge.
All things considered, I think the positive things about Baveno outweigh the negative things. I think I have a good enough attitude that I can work my way around the negative things. I hold my breath and walk quickly by people that smoke. I carry earplugs at all times, or stick my fingers in my ears, when exposed to loud noises. I shop for good, non-fattening food and eat at home when possible. I study Italian, and learn new things every day.
“Everywhere I live, I can list some good things and some bad things.” Exactly. Your positive attitude will tend to sway the balance and reward you with positive experiences.
@Sam-a-Lamb Same thing about Woodbury and everywhere else I've lived. There are positives and negatives. I concentrate on the positives and find work-arounds for the negatives.
I am currently living with my sister in Albuquerque, NM, in Paradise Meadows housing division on the northwest corner, close to Rio Rancho.
There is a wide arroyo desert ravine between the housing divisions on the hills, so I walk down through Paradise Meadows to Paradise Meadows Park at the bottom of the hill, then go through the baffle gate into the desert.
I return by hiking up the ravine until I'm below my house, climbing up the sides of the valley, then going up a nearly vertical concrete water channel to reach my cul-de-sac.
If I skip my hike, am late, or go to a different place to go hiking, many of the animals and birds will come to my sliding glass doors to check on me.
My daughter closed the curtains to the door just now so she could see her computer screen, and our resident male curve-billed thrasher panicked when he could no longer see me.
He began calling me desperately.."WIT, WIT," and when I answered him, he burst into joyful song, but I still opened the curtain blinds to prevent other birds from panicking also.
Photo: me climbing trail out of desert ravine along the water channel, to reach my cul-de-sac.
I loved reading this and picturing you with your wild friends
I live in a detached home in a beautiful rural setting in the middle of Northern Ireland. I’m one mile from the village, and six miles from a bigger town, where my children went to school, and there is a good variety of shops and other facilities. The house is probably too large for me now I’m on my own, and I need to pay someone to look after the large garden, but I’m definitely happy living here. I came here from one of the most beautiful cities in the world, Edinburgh, and I still love going back to visit, but I’ve been here too long to go back to live there. After 45 years here, this is definitely where I consider home to be.
It sounds like a beautiful place, I've always wanted to visit Ireland and Scotland. Hope to one day.
@Pamscwf1 I don’t think you’ll be disappointed.
Ditto!
I have deep family roots in Scotland, back to days of William Wallace. One ancestor was Wallace’s mentor, another few fought with him.
@Justjoni Wow! Then you must visit.
@Marionville I would really enjoy that
@Sam-a-Lamb It is actually 45 years! I have been in this house for 35, but in Northern Ireland for 45! You should try to visit Edinburgh...it’s a wonderful city.
@Sam-a-Lamb It is...you must try to visit.
I've thought about that. I live in Florida, but spent 20 years in Colorado. My fantasy paradise would be Colorado with Florida weather. Or Florida with the Rocky Mountains running down its length!
Can't beat my chest hard enough about how much I like the Puget Sound area. Except for the winters, where the cold isn't extreme but penetrates right down into the bones - which is why we're looking for a place in the tri cities area. Hopefully be moved by the time fall hits.
The Seattle area is one of the cities on the top of my travel bucket list. Everyone I know who either lives there or been there loves it.
@Sam-a-Lamb visit in the summer, it's quite nice.
I’m back in my hometown, and it’s ok. Familiar, family and friends are close. I’m in the southwestern part of NC so mountains are two hours away, beaches four hours. I like that!
@Sam-a-Lamb I lived here in the Charlotte area til 2004; in Raleigh NC til 2014(hated it in eastern NC). 2014-17, I lived in Asheville, in the mountains. I loved it very much but the traffic was killer...and my family are all still down here. I spent about a year in Shelby near my son, then found this place in my hometown. It’s nice to be back. It’s grown and changed enough to be interesting, but stayed the same enough to be nostalgic.
I live in San Antonio, Tx. I have come to the conclusion that it is a fairly boring place to live. Opportunities to enjoy good music are somewhat difficult to divine & this is important to me. I do love the local cuisine but after a while that too seems somewhat limited.
I think I might like living in New Orleans although I wonder if I would feel the same after actually living there for a while. I do admire that city's style & I know for a fact that the cuisine there is absolutely amazing. Being a Jazz Musician, it's easy to imagine that I would like it there & fit in nicely. New Orleans.
From all I’ve heard, and what you’ve shared here, New Orleans sounds like a great fit!
I like where I live, small rural city of about 10,000. I live on the edge of the city in a fairly new area with a big yard, lots of trees, and plenty of nature. Not much to do so it's quiet and they keep the city very clean. City was just listed as the 9th safest city in Wisconsin. People are very friendly and will wave as you ride by on your bike. Lots of churches here but so far I have encountered very few pushy religious types in the 15 years I lived here.