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I want to admit, It's not cool being alone and feeling lonely. My sons are grown and moved on to a life of their own. I have female friends at my gym, at my work, and in the neighborhood, and I do keep busy, but it's not the same as having a partner to go on dates, go for walks and hikes holding hands, talk to each other, share laughs, cuddle to watch movies, and listen to music in each other's arms. I didn't realize how difficult it was going to be to find that special someone with similar interests. I have, however, attracted my share of scammers, here on Agnostic. They said and promised anything and everything for the all mighty cash. Well, I just wanted to share that with you. Thank you for reading/listening.

NatureGal 6 June 29
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12 comments

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1

I tried when i'm on site to set up a date or meet; never got a clear answer...Nick

NikMan Level 4 July 12, 2019
1

The same for me,I have used about every dating site,some free and others the membership,so many scammers,separating you from your money.Empty promises,come on's,it never ends...

Two things raised alarm, and I knew It was a scam... request for money and couldn't meet in person because working and/or serving overseas. Scammers are very skillful, and they're very good at it. I just can't believe I fell for it. However, they didn't get far with me, thankfully. "live and learn" the saying goes. Now, I know better... I trust no one!

1

Maybe it’s fortunate my 30 year marriage lacked the depth of ..what you describe. I learned not to miss what I had little of to begin with.. What I’m finding now is, those who are long-time single, are for a reason. Don’t feel I’ve time to waste caretaking (again) or tweaking myself to match a well developed other.

A daughter and (future son in law) her BF have been visiting.. I remember those days … so much was new, both headed toward a shared goal. But for those of us having reached, then moved beyond that goal, what next? And, we’re such deeply developed people, how do we avoid constantly clashing with someone of equal depth?

Something in me remains open, if guarded. And around here, I’m not worth scamming 🙂

Varn Level 8 June 30, 2019
1

Preaching to the choir same problems here but keep trying here this is the best place

bobwjr Level 10 June 30, 2019

Thank you, Bob! I'm staying put on Agnostic.

2

I reach out to you and commiserate. I don’t know how long you have been on your own, but in my case it’s almost nine years and have now adjusted to living alone. I think it’s better to be on your own rather than being in a relationship just because you feel you need to be with someone to feel less lonely. There has to be chemistry between two people before that can be considered, it would be unthinkable for me otherwise. I can only say in my case I’m now very contented and happy living on my own and the need to feel that close physical contact which I felt in the early days after my husband’s death has gone now. I know female friendships can never replace the bond between partners, but they are still very important and I know without the support and friendship I get from my mine, my life would be a much sadder and lonely place. Don’t be discouraged by the scammers, I’m sure that there are plenty of other, genuine men out there who are looking for love and companionship, and I wish you well in your quest to find the right one for you.

Thank you, for your kind and encouraging words. My estranged husband has been converted to a Born Again, fanatic Evangelist. He's pro gun, pro Trump. He's everything I'm not.

@NatureGal Nightmare scenario! Keep strong,

1

I think when we have lived a little longer than most we all have pretty well defined what we want in life and what type of person we want to share that with - finding that exact match is hard, and depends on how much you are willing to compromise..

Scammers - scam them - string them along with long and meaningless trivia - dangle the cash, tease them with the payoff, then pull it away at the last minute - can be fun

True, finding exact match, is unreal. I know about compromising, and I will again for the right person. I thought I wouldn't fall to scammers, because I knew better. They're masterful at their craft. Thankfully, I didn't loose cash.

1

Hi join the scammers group. Please don't send money to anyone though

Amisja Level 8 June 30, 2019
2

Life and love and companionship is so very challenging. I have the notion that ultimately we all die alone. Even is someone loves us, they have to let us go. Sorry for your travails.

Scammers suck

1

I'm sorry. that truly sucks. it's sad that we can't trust people more easily without being burned. on the + side it makes thing all the better when it does happen ... but when you're on the outside looking in it sucks. I liked that quote from Keanu a lot about getting to like himself even better. That's what I consider the silver lining also. I learn and do interesting things and I have interesting points of view. I will keep cultivating friendships and moving forward. who knows what might happen.

Thank you for your positive input, Jeff.

@NatureGal you are certainly welcome. I wish you luck in your journey. namaste

1

It is unfortunate that scammers find their way to most sites. At some point you'll be able to identify them quickly and waste little to no time with them. Eventually you'll find the love and companionship that you deserve.

Unity Level 8 June 29, 2019
2

Yes it is not the same, that’s true but it has a lot of good points too, being alone. You can eat what you like, you don’t have to compromise, your money is your own, if you want to go somewhere you don’t have to think of hurrying home, etc, etc.

I cherish my independence, and I'm not planning on losing it, nor do I plan on tying the knots, yet.

@NoPlanetB Just make sure you don't get a cat either then.

2

Best of luck in your search.

1of5 Level 8 June 29, 2019
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