"I'm so glad we finally got the opportunity to meet because, as you know, it's such an important part of seeing whether there's chemistry. I really enjoyed our time together, but I don't feel a romantic connection which is what you're looking for. I hope you'll appreciate my being up front. I'd want someone to do the same if it were me."

I've said this many times and it has always been appreciated, even if disappointing. It doesn't include a single lie, and it doesn't leave the door open for further pursuit.

Honesty is best. "I'm sorry, but I am not experiencing the same level of connection that you seem to be. I won't insult you by pretending to be more affectionate than I feel, and I truly wish you the best and hope you find love."

Key words I use:

"No chemistry."

"We don't make a good match."

"Good luck in your search."

I thank them for meeting me, but admit that I just don't feel what I need to feel to want to continue ...

While there might be some disappointment on their part (mine too), I've never had a problem.

They maintain their dignity, there's no blame on them, and they feel respected !

You met someone else and have to see where it goes.

I don’t think there is a good answer to this question. Arranging a date with someone you’ve never met seems like putting the cart before the horse, to me. Online dating is a horrible idea.

I’d rather at least see a person with my own eyes first, and have a conversation in a non-dating context before even thinking about dating. It worked for 200,000 years. I bet it can still work.

I'm always very polite and straightforward. Sometimes I schedule a meet with 3 - 4 guys at a bar and choose two for a threesome. I always pay my bill, so I won't ask for any favors. Simple state that all look great, nice , but tonight just choose these people to play.

Be honest, polite and respectful

Just be upfront. False hopes are worse than the initial hurt of rejection. You will hurt their feelings and there is no way to avoid that. Hemming and hawing is may feel nice, but it's really not.

Be truthful,say there's no "Chemistry", tell them you appreciate them as a friend, but not as a romantic possibility,life is full of disappointments,tell them to keep looking,there's a Woman for him.....

How about kindly saying, "I'm sorry, I have other priorities right now, but thank you for your lovely attention".

Honesty is ALWAYS the best policy. I establish that up front for both of us. When it comes to "that" time... I just say, "We said we'd be honest with each other and, to tell the truth, I don't see a long term connection here. I'm really sorry and I hope you find someone that matches what you are looking for."

To be honest I do not understand your bio. You say you are only here for community only but you clearly want to date and to write about dating. A truly honest real man would not invade your privacy or go against your wishes by contacting you for dating. You are sending the wrong message to decent men who respect your written wishes.

Thank you very much for your attention but I do not think we are a good match. Good luck in your search.
Not rude but not vague and sends a clear message.

LL- Thank you for as least asking the ? and thus showing you are more kind and considerate than most people in online dating, who would just take the easy way and ghost. Like skado said below, there is no easy answer. You could do what I do in those rare situations where someone is more interested in me than I am in them and do this: Send them a short message thanking them sincerely for meeting you and point out something positive about them so they feel some encouragement about being dateable in general, but also make it clear that you do not feel they are a match for you and that you are moving on. If they bother to ask your reason or reasons for not wanting to continue to see them or have contact, which is very rare in my experience that someone would ask, I will tell them the blunt truth, since they are an adult and by asking they are implying they are able to handle the truth, so that's what I will give them.

On the face of it, asking the reasons why someone is rejecting you may seem to make no sense or be useless, but, having been on both ends of the rejection situation in online dating, it does make some sense in that otherwise the rejected have no real data or info to understand why they are experiencing so much rejection, a common experience in online dating, and it also helps give the rejected more of a realistic idea who they have a chance with in online dating and who they don't. Which, trust me, can be helpful in such in an otherwise impersonal, mysterious process as online dating is anyway. With so much rejection and ignoring that average looking and most people in online dating experience, some honest feedback can be very valuable and useful, esp. if it concerns something the rejected party might be able to do something about, like hygiene, attitude, what they said or shared that was inappropriate etc..

I told a guy I was not looking to seriously date at the time and he'd be better off finding someone else that was (he was looking for a serious relationship).

I've never had to turn one away - they take care of it themselves. Usually they discover they're "too busy" or "not ready" for dating. Or, when I contact them again they've "just met" someone they want to be exclusive with.

But consider this: if you don't call her, and she doesn't call you, who is ghosting who? Why is it always the man's responsibility?

Just say so! Nothing new!

I found I usually just got ghosted. Or if it was my decision I tended to do the same. I find it hard to explain why there is no attraction once we meet. They are often very nice women in many ways, but something just doesn’t click romantically. Of course I have remained friends with others and share their happiness if and when they find someone they gel with. I have pretty much abandoned online dating at this point; in fact I have pretty much abandoned dating in general. Being alone has become quite comfortable foe me. But that said, if I met someone online or in life I found interesting, I would not hesitate to get to know them better. Just last summer my dog and I took a road trip to meet two women I have known online for a while, one 12 years! It was pleasant enough, but neither will be more than online friends. A beautiful woman like yourself should have little trouble finding dates online or in the real world.

Its been weird for me in these situations. Each time I have encountered this circumstance I seem to have some kind of family emergency...