I have a new facet to my parenting today. Y'all may know I'm mom and grammy. My 31 year old daughter recently broke up with her long term boyfriend. Last night she met her sisters and I for dinner and told us she is coming out of the closet. And we said cool, makes sense. Today she is meeting her dad for lunch at a restaurant to share that news with him. He is conservative xian homophobe. So I just texted her something I thought of this morning.
"I want to give you some perspective. You are exactly the person you were created to be at exactly the moment you were created 32 years ago in the guest bed at Granny's house the night Sarah fell asleep before Daddy did. Don't let anyone tell you to be anyone beside who you are."
When we created this child we were living in Germany and back in the US for vacation. The oldest was 2.5, and very excited to be sharing a room with other people. Getting her to sleep was a challenge. We had ONE night of adult activity in over a month, and that is when #2 was created. There is no doubt in my mind that she is exactly who she is because of the circumstance and the upbringing she had. She is awesome and amazing.
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A lot of conservative people have longstanding negative views on same sex attraction, mostly because they don't know anyone close to them who honestly admits something so private and intimate. Once they meet a loved one's partner and can see the joy and love they bring to each other, it makes "crossing that bridge" easy. Don't be surprised if when that time comes her dad will be beaming with pride and will have a changed tune. (Let's hope so anyway!)
Unfortunately even some same sex couples who are so right for each other that they choose to be married can't get the support of one or all of their parents, so they miss out on the wedding and experiencing a joyous occasion. "God" can put a rainbow in the sky, but can't force any human to see the beauty of it.
Glad she has your support and her sisters. Dad will likely come around too, so not to be left out of her life. At least he corrected the "burning" to "crossing" of the bridge, which is definitely hopeful, and likely a baby step toward support.
Julie808
Level 8
Sep 21, 2019
1
I work in customer service for the billing office of a pediatrics hospital. I've talked to a few parents that are in or were in same gender relationships that produced the child that was the patient in our hospital. I've heard parents of both genders bad mouth the other parent. It just proves to me that people are. Same gender marriages aren't necessarily more stable or more amicable during a split than a traditional marriage.
That's wonderful Gf..your family support maybe crucial to her in the upcoming days. I hope all went well with her Dad..
Charlene
Level 9
Sep 21, 2019
2
He told her he'd pray for her, and if she brought a girl friend to meet him he'd burn that bridge when he came to it, then he corrected to cross that bridge. I'm sure he meant it funny and warning.
Mother and daughter standing proud...! I hope her father can feel that same pride.
Marionville
Level 10
Sep 21, 2019
3
He told her he'd pray for her, and if she brought a girl friend to meet him he'd burn that bridge when he came to it, then he corrected to cross that bridge. I'm sure he meant it funny and warning.
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