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Do any of you think that a meaningful relationship can be acheived with a christian? Lol im quite entrenched in one and am having existential issues 😓

BradleyBell 4 Jan 13
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0

It depends on the individuals involved. Each partner needs to respect the other's enough not to mock or ridicule their belief. As for the Christian side of this question, there is a New Testament passage that seems to validate the mixed belief relationship. 1 Corinthians 7:14 "For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy." Many other passages are not at all complimentary of disbelief and would make mutual respect within a mixed belief relationship impossible, but such is the nature of the Bible saying one thing in one part and something opposite in another. It's my belief that a successful relationship will place the wellness of their partner (along with themselves) at the top of their priorities in the relationship. It means beliefs would be secondary to the partner's well being which would include a sort of "hands off" the partner's beliefs. Both partners need to hold this similar value.

As I write this, I can think of all sorts of caveats and sticking points - how to raise the kids, what if certain beliefs are harmful either to the believer or others, etc. I would still maintain that these issues could be dealt with for the most part if the partners in the relationship respected one another. Behaviors and attitudes are much more important than beliefs within a relationship. When beliefs become an issue, I suspect it is because the belief adversely effects behaviors and attitudes.

9

I couldn't do it unless he rarely spoke and brought me food.

I guess I could definitely have a Christian butler.

You're obviously dying to do it so the only thing you need to ask yourself is this.
If it doesn't work out, will you recover? If it won't kill you then take a chance.

LOL! ...Idk. Seems pointless if you have already lost your appetite. Perhaps if the person was entirely mute...

9

I've just ended a relationship with a fundamentalist. We did all we could to avoid religious conversation. After five months the floodgates opened.

I wish you the best.

7

With a 'relaxed christian', possibly.

With a howling, evangelical, probably not.

6

Why would you waste your time, energy, and sanity on the accommodation of delusional thinking?

6

Sure. Just give yer heart to Jesus and everything will be OK!

skado Level 9 Jan 13, 2020
5

i could never have a permanent meaningful relationship with a religious christian. forgetting for the moment that i am spoken for, i will say that there are plenty of people who nominally identify as christians but don't let it interfere with their lives. it is the devout who present problems. add to that the fact that i was raised a secular jew and was abused by christians throughout my childhood and intermittently after that and you wouldn't find me getting close enough to a devout christian to begin a meaningful relationship, so it would be moot for me.

g

5

I could overlook quite a lot, for a while, but I'm a special case. After a period of intimacy the hypocrisy would drive me nuts.

5

As long as you both can respect each other’s position and not try to prove the other wrong it should not be a issue .

5

If you want to take the definitions in the field of psychology literally, then religion is actually a form of mental illness. It can be mild, or it can be very serious--depending upon how deeply indoctrinated the person is. Frankly, I just cannot get seriously involved with a person with mental problems.

5

NO. Just NO

5

My gut says no, because, for me, I can only pity the gullible, brainwashed believer. If that is not a problem for you, and, if your partner is not part of a believer community hell bent on either converting you or separating you as "unequally yoked", then maybe... I still think it a poor match at best. Most deserve better.

Zster Level 8 Jan 13, 2020
5

Welcome to the asylum. Enjoy your stay.

In my experience, it is not possible to maintain a long-term, successful relationship with a believer.
It may start off with promises of full acceptance, non-judgment, and no attempts at conversion, BUT, those promises fall away as soon as there are disagreements
on the fundamentals.

I have learned not to bother with futility.

Oh, and not to have kids with believers. They'll try to take over
how they're raised.

4

My experience is that you can have a relationship with a religious person, but because of a differing basis of what you see as reality, there are limits as to how close you will ever get, and it is also more likely as time goes on that your interests will verge into different directions and romance will fizzle out.

Not a problem..all my relationships petered out even when both of us were devoted Christians; my ex and I read the Bible, attended church, prayed, performed Christian music together, etc. but of course Christianity doesn't make anyone better, or improve their characters, and we divorced anyway.

4

My first marriage was to a Moron (Mormon) when I, too, was a Moron. When I discovered that Moronism was false, I left the church and was excommunicated for apostasy (best thing the Morons ever did for me). My wife, still clinging to Moronism, took the children and disappeared. Later I was served with divorce papers. I will never again form a meaningful relationship with a person who is deceived by religion.

4
4

You can of course, but I m sure it will depend on how much your differing views impede the relationship.

4

Depends on the level of brainwashing your christian friend has.

4

Not for me. Too much resentment and disdain for theists atm. Others are able to make it work. fck if I know how they work it out, especially if they decide to produce spawn and then must raise em religious or not.

3

I had a 12-year live-together pretty-good relationship with lady born Fundamentalist, then switched a few times to end-up as Catholic. We both had our own notions about the religion issue and agreed to not rub each other's nose in our ideas. It worked fine. She did her Catholic stuff and I just didn't participate, or even mention it. Her saying she was going to Mass was no different from saying she was headed out for her nail appointment. It didn't seem to adversely affect our lives, which were otherwise fairly-well matched. I think some people just need the religion thing as extra support. OK with me.

3

I have no doubt. Finding the diamond in the rough may be the challenge.

3

Possibly some are nice people except evangelical Christians who are nasty

bobwjr Level 10 Jan 13, 2020
2

I had a hard drinking atheist married to a Jehovah's Witnesses work for me once he was a road driver so was only home one day a week. I hear it broke up after he retired.

2

I guess it depends if you argue over it or not. If you just give each other breathing space On that subject, I can’t see any problem.

2

My parents were married 50 years and they had 4 children. 😍

He wasn't an out-right atheist -- he mostly didn't care. 🙂
She was a devout Mormon -- she taught at the Mesa temple and one of her sons was a bishop. 😐

We are an independent family and some subjects just didn't come up at our table. Lol.😎
It is possible but there is some effort and allowances are involved.
I probably wouldn't have answered this post but I'm in the middle of a glass of brandy after dinner. Lol 😋

2

It really depends on the two people and their level of commitment to their beliefs and each other.

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