This is why some Christian's are looked upon with such disdain. I was at work the other day. And a coworker and I got to talking. I explained that at the time I was staying with my ex wife. I was helping her out financially, until she got things straightened out again. At which point this person had the audacity to ask me. If my ex wife and I were having sex? Cause god doesn't approve of sex outside of marriage.
My first thought was, how in the hell is it any of your damn business what we may or may not be doing? ( We're not by the way). And 2nd, your opinion of your thoughts on this. Based merely in your choice to believe in something. That I equate with the same belief as Santa Claus, the Easter bunny, or the Great Pumpkin. Was neither asked for not wanted. And is not a conversation one should be having at work.
Finally, I spoke with a manager and relayed my concern with this individual and their comments and questions. And it does seem that it has alleviated this issue. But seriously, do some think that because they're religious or devout. That it gives them a pass on workplace ethics, or simple common decency?
The "pass" on your workplace ethics in this issue is most likely that the manager is also a Christian. Even if they are not actively going to any church at this time it would make that person lean towards the area of biblical teaching as they know it. This means your complaint has fallen on deaf ears.
Imagine now the more realistic concept that marriage as we know it today did not come about until the Middle Ages. Nobody in ancient times had a legal certificate or paid some fee to the state. Being married had a ceremony then but this was more for the locals to understand who was married and who was not. If you want to you can throw in the sky fairy.
I agree with you in that it is not their business. I would have played him. "Sure, since we are going to split, she cannot keep her hands off me. I am so tired, never like this when we were married. Could you take her off my hands so I can get some sleep, just a week or so," See what he does. then go from their, at this point it is about making up a good story not the truth. He does not want the truth he wants to get you into a situation where he is better than you, Story Time?
Absolutely not! Most of these self-righteous assholes are just as f*cked up, if not more so as everyone else.
At least everyone will know after the conversation and then there is another person to pick on. I never have the thought when this is happening, I am always late with the good ones.
If this kind of thing happened to me living in the uk i would be very surprised. My response would depend on my mod at the moment and who was speaking to me. I would vary from F off to asking the same questions of them or letting my sarcasm loose and giving a detail desription of having sex with some one.
My 1st response would have been "its's none of your business, but seeing as how you want to know so much about someone else's sex life...does your wife /girlfriend like it better missionary or doggie style and does she swallow or spit?" That will usually shut them up fast. How dare he...arrogant prick. Keep in mind I just don't give a damn anymore. That's just me...not everyone would be as subtle as I am. It's possible this person would try to report ME for harassing THEM but keep in mind they started that line of questioning so they would get nowhere. Worst case in that scenario I think is we would both get a warning...to me it would be worth it because I guarantee they would never attempt that line of thought again.
You are talking about your personal life at work, why shouldn't he express thebtjinga that matter to him? If you don't want to hear from other people, don't talk to them.
I agree in that by being more personal. I kinda invited this upon myself. Which is why I'm no longer discussing my personal life at work. In an effort to just be more open. I opened myself up for this. So my interactions with this person will strictly be about work. Thanks for your honest answer.
You could point out that since marriage is a sacrament and divorce isn't then in the eyes of God you are still married, and since the Bible doesn't condemn polygamy, you are still free to marry again.
That was my thought - many even allow rape in marriage.
In a word, yes.
That's why we must remind them at every opportunity, their lifestyle and "values" originated from mythology...
To me... Religious harassment is just as bad as sexual harassment. However... You leave yourself wide open to any type of criticisms if you are discussing personal matters in the workplace.
So what have we learned? You have an ignorant co-worker... Steer clear!
I wish I could say it was just Christians but it seems to me like it's a favorite American pastime, regardless of religion, to nose into other people's business and tell them what to do. You know, because what you do affects me and I'm just concerned about your well being and all. Perhaps it all started with reality TV. I'm curious, though, why didn't you just walk away? And why tell the manager and not the person who was nosing into your business?
If any coworker 1) asked me how/who/when I f*ck, and 2) stated I was subject to eternal damnation for doing so, my employer would hear about it through very official channels.
It seems 'true believers" think they have a mandate to spread the word. The bible commands them to do it.
When I worked, I pretty much kept away from any discussions of my personal life. However, when I went partially blind and stopped working it was still in the early 1990's, and I could have gotten fired for being gay. (I think at one job they figured it out and fired me for it).
I dont' think religion should be discussed in the work environment at all.
It's been this way for a long time and too many are afraid of confronting them. They think it's alright to question another's morals. Now that more are stepping up they are feeling others are at war with religion. People really need to learn how to be assertive and non-confrontational at the same time.
Whether or not there is a god and whether or not it agrees with your coworker about acceptable conditions for sex would be a matter of complete indifference to me. Pathetic that he just assumes you should agree with that or that you would care to know his opinion.
Prurience is #1 topic on the minds of all religions ...the Christian denominations have an unhealthy relationship with sex, always have done. Make anything illicit or taboo and a perfectly natural activity becomes dirty and sinful. I do hope you actually voiced your displeasure to your coworker on being asked that question, as that was overstepping the line between general and personal conversation and needed to be stamped on ..hard!
Stop talking to Xstians about anything but the weather, they invariably disappoint.
I saw a movie recently where a woman, whenever she was asked personal questions, she would say nothing and just look at the person with this look. The movie ended up being some strange spiritual or religious thing that I didn't understand but my one takeaway was I really want to learn to say nothing and give people that look when they ask me personal questions.
Is that the one where they lift just one eyebrow? That's a confronting look.
@Cyklone Ha, ha. It was more of a lowered chin and wide eyes. Not really angry but still sort of chiding. Totally made me squirm to even watch it happen.
I agree...none of their business. But, you did invite that person into a personal conversation. They must have felt comfortable enough with you to offer such "wisdom." I would say their god is very judgmental!
I see your point. And I've ended any discussions with them. Unless it relates to the job we do.