What do you say on facebook to friends or family that have lost a loved one? Most people type prayers or sending prayers. I usually post you and your family are in my thoughts.
Sending love and hugs...my thoughts are with you...here for you.
My condolences as to your loss, nothing about death is fair to anyone, I hope the memories you have of the deceased bring you peace and comfort for the rest of your days.
Totally stealing that one
@MuppetGirl All good. I thought that up shortly after coming across this post, and would have no idea if someone else had ever said anything similar.
Sometimes I ask if they have looked in the last place they saw them. That's what I do when I lose something.
It's never received well, I've found.
That reminds me everyone says they want a fairy tale wedding, but when I show up and curse their firstborn, suddenly I'm the jerk.
I lived in the middle East for a while and I have adopted a version of what they say that I feel conveys sympathy without invoking a deity or referencing an afterlife.
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. May peace and grace be upon you and yours now and forever.
Honestly that they are in my thoughts. If I am closer to them then offer some time, food, possibly a little day to day support while they are adjusting. Usually that first week or so is pretty busy with people in and out and the funeral, wake, whatever else the family might have planned. It's usually the weeks that follow that are the harder to deal with. Checking in with them a few weeks after if you are close enough to them is a good thing to do and letting them spill a bit if they need to.
I don't do that on Facebook. Social media isn't the place for everything, imo
I may say something like, " I know this is the hardest thing in the world, but just know that it gets easier with time".
I usually tell them I am sorry for their lost and send my deepest condolences.
If they were close enough for me to say something I’ll call. Then if it’s possible I’ll show up and if not I’ll send fruit or a food basket but never flowers ... people grieving forget to eat.... when my dad passed my mom needed the food and was made more upset by flowers. Once the dining table was full of vases and flowers she made me get it all out... FB is not the place. IMHO
Yes, this is a time when letting the grieving person know they are in your thoughts is acceptable. Depending on my relationship with the person suffering the loss, I might offer some tangible help, if there's something they can use, whether it be to take a walk and talk about how they feel, or some help with meals or cleaning, packing up their loved one's belongings, etc.,
Of course, in my line of work (conducting funerals is part of what I do) I make myself avaiaable to conduct the service or offer resources for conducting their own funeral service, memorial or ash scattering.
I say I am sorry it happened and that I'll be remembering them.
I say my thoughts are with you at this difficult time. If it is a close friend, I would offer my help in any capacity they might need.
I usually say: Sending positive healing energy. I'll be thinking about you and your family. Hugs!