I usually shower twice per day, sometimes 3 IF I've been working in the gardens, etc, and I go through bars of soap at a rate that would astound most people because of, a) my number of daily showers and b) as a nurse we were trained to wash our hands at every chance we got AND after attending to EACH patient.
Pity these God botherers don't heed the advice they so love to dish out to everyone, i.e. Cleanliness is next to Godliness, because he, if his Catholic Lady friend (???) is not around for a week or so, develops that unmistakable body odour of his and boy, oh boy is strong.

@Triphid I bath once a day, but my hands are in soap & water dozens of times a day.

@OldMetalHead Well, they make a BIG show, as I have most unfortunately found because I have been invited in ti his house to have a coffee with them both a number of times, of making certain that everyone gets to see the 3 bedrooms with beds already made and all neat and tidy and the unspoken innuendo seems to be something akin to " Liz sleeps in this bed when she stays here over night and I do the same when I stay at her house overnight."
They must think that I came down in the last shower of rain for them to think that, shit, I've been around for 60+ years, I do know the facts of life and I am NO sheep so there is NO wool that can be pulled over my eyes.

@Triphid Pure as the driven snow.....right!!!!!

@Lilac-JadeCanada Yes, so pure that it resembles a bituminized airstrip.

@Triphid Christiots are so obsessed with sex, which is such a normal thing for adults to do with each other if so inclined. That he made a point to show you that she had an extra bed to sleep in is amusing.

@BufftonBeotch The point is, imo, and from knowing of his numerous previous attempts at attracting and secure a female in to his life, that he "declared" such a statement because, as he once informed a couple, de-facto couple btw, who rented the house 3 doors up the road from his, " Jesus who is the Son of God and God who was in Human Form declared it a great sin for any couple who are NOT married to engage in sexual activities before they are made as one."
In other he is, imo, covering his and her arse with a pack of lies so as to make himself look as pious and devout as possible.
If he still clings to idea that the entire neighbourhood has no recollection of things he has done, etc, any further back than a few short years ago, like he drug addled memory always is, then he does not know shit from clay.

I'd say that you'd be 100% correct with that assessment, imo, he is as THICK as 2 short, fat Tasmanians and has the attention span of any member of the Australian liberal Party, which, btw, is extremely short imo.

He tried the same invite bit about 6 years ago and was absolutely shocked when I told that I could NEVER attend those Pagan Rites as it would go against my Druidic Heritage.

@Triphid Oh! That's good. You have a wicked sense of humor. From washing your golden locks to Druid rituals. What an imagination.

Even funerals turn into hell and brimstone things in the South (USA)

@BufftonBeotch Most of my friends had simple funerals (interestingly we have three funeral homes here and all of them have been conducted by the one funeral home) at the funeral home only 4 were at a catholic church. A mother and father of one of my best friends and then my best friend and a father of one of my brothers friends they tend to drone on but as the sides of the church open out I just look for birds etc instead of listening to the cult leaders.

Tell me something I did not already know.
He has lived in the house next door for 10 years now, managed to either alienate or make complete enemies of at least 30-40% of the townspeople, has been ORDERED to LEAVE every Church, etc, excluding the " backyard" one that he now has re-joined because his friend (????) whom I have nicknamed Pope Paul, aka Paul Skelley, has invited him back to it. I seriously think and believe Skelley has discovered the monetary potential of Evangelidiot since Evangelidiot is now working, on the side and still claiming unemployment benefits btw, as a very poor example of a Wannabe Gardener and Tree Pruner.

Looking the genius of Evangeloon, and putting it into the context of driving your 4-wheel drive into one of those famous Irish peat bogs and getting it bogged there, and putting up that absurdly flimsy television mast that was guaranteed to collapse in a moderate wind, let alone one of those howling gales that come off the Atlantic, the wind-up idea seems to me to be a trifle unlikely.

If memory serves me correctly, he was also growing some of those "special plants" for a while.

" Wind me up, " he'd be hard pressed in trying to wind up clock, trust me on that one PLEASE.

@anglophone Yes he was and somehow they all died because, I think some naughty malevolent "spirit" sprayed them with a Herbicide.
Can't blame the little 'spirit' can you, after they were "weed" and they were sprayed with a weed-killer.

May I take that as a well deserved and earned compliment then?

@Triphid Yes, you may.

Loud guffaws directly under the parson's nose might amount to unseemly behaviour.

I don’t know…I’m sure our friend @Triphid could have some fun in church at his expense! At the very least be an embarrassment to him…he’d never be asked back again!

@Marionville Maybe demonstrate standing naked before the Lord?

That might do it.

@BufftonBeotch yes…baring all may just do it!

@Marionville I thought of taking a trip to the town I was raised in-and then visiting the congregation I was indoctrinated in. The last idea would not be a good one. Things could soon become rowdy- I have a very low tolerance for profoundly foolish stupidity.

@Diogenes Very wise decision.

@anglophone I was thinking more like having Meatloaf singing " Bat Out Of Hell" at MAXIMUM volume and on continuous replay during the sermons.

@anglophone, @Marionville Okay, I'll 'fess up here and now, you've got me dead to rights.
Last evening I was invited and went around to the home of another very good and extremely outspoken and daring, more DARING than me btw, of Atheist.
We were discussing the up and coming Christfool Celebration of their Great Myth when I mentioned about Evangelidiot and his ridiculous attempt to tempt ME into attending Church with him.
The smile that crossed her face IMMEDIATELY told both me and her partner, they are Lesbians btw, and I that she had just thought of something that would truly " stir the pot" so to speak.
She started to tell us of her brainwave and the idea took hold immediately.
Instead of joining Evangelidiot & his few rare "friends' for this Church thing, we are going to rouse up ALL the Gays and Lesbians in and around town, I am included even though I'm straight but considered to be a NOT Gay but good friend and companion, and WE, en-mass, are going to ATTEND this Church meeting on Easter Sunday, COMPLETE with the Rainbow Flags as well.

@Triphid Do let us know how that all pans out!

@Triphid You are all a bunch of shit stirrers! Go for it!

Evil suggestion: wear a LGBTIQ rainbow handkerchief on your head.

@Marionville I most certainly will and hopefully our Bail will not be all that expensive IF we even get arrested that is because we know that amongst our little "Congregation" that will be "enhancing" their Church Service will be a couple of Gay Fire Officers, a couple ( my friends btw,) of Lesbian Paramedics, 3 Transsexual Shop Assistants and 1 Bi-sexual Solicitor as well as the not so well known about pair of Gay Police Officers.
I guess I'll be the only "straight" but supportive person in the whole danged mob come Sunday Evening then...LOL, but Who cares, most definitely NOT me.

@anglophone Hah, hah, hah, already sorted, Katrina just dropped by to show me my attire for Church on Sunday.
It consists of 1 rainbow patterned Kaftan, a pair of rainbow coloured sandals and a life sized, plastic cross, also a plastic replica of the crown of thorns as per the Jeebus myth, also made from rainbow coloured plastic.
That outfit should 'brighten' up the Sunday Service at the Church no end. LOL.

@Triphid Please take some pictures.

@BufftonBeotch I'll will ask the ladies to do that since digi-camera is at present kaput.

@Triphid A group photo beforehand. And be respectful. Not that a collective "I Am Spartacus!"type moment wouldn't be fulfilling.

@BufftonBeotch I shall see what can be arranged but it will, I assume need the consent of the Ladies and the rest of the crowd.