"We never love anyone. What we love is the idea we have of someone. It’s our own concept – our own selves – that we love. This is true in the whole gamut of love. In sexual love we seek our own pleasure via another body. In non-sexual love, we seek our own pleasure via our own idea. The masturbator may be abject, but in point of fact he’s the perfect logical expression of the lover. He’s the only one who doesn’t feign and doesn’t fool himself."
Fernando Pessoa: The Book of Disquiet (Penguin Modern Classics) (p.104)
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6 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.This is a horrible quote, on so many levels. Amazingly so. It's like it's done on purpose.
StoicsFuckBest
Level 3
June 6, 2022
0
Over and over, I hear the stories from women about how their BF has changed and how she wants him to be like he was when they met. WHY do they get so deeply involved with these guys before knowing them?
BitFlipper
Level 8
May 31, 2022
1
Because both partners are on their best behavior during the courtship phase.
My first husband always looked clean and neat during that courtship phase. After marriage I had to throw a fit to get him to take a bath.
@Lorajay yes, my ex also changed into a different person after a year of marriage. As it turns out, she thought she was going to get to quit her job, stay home, and make quilts.
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