I agree i hate texting. I try to video chat if i must be away.
My gawd, I'm so tired of people blaming technology for their own inadequacies.
Communicating clearly via technology is a skillset.
It's not technology's fault if you don't have that skillset.
That is part of the problem why so many messages are either misinterpreted because the lack of human connection is gone. People need that. Too many people are becoming isolated because of the convenience of doing it.
@mistymoon77 See here's the thing: I don't believe for a hot second that technology removes human connection or isolates people. For so, so, so many people, technology provides a lifeline to the outside world that they would not have otherwise.
When I was a teenager living almost an hour driving time away from all the families my parents deemed acceptable for socializing with, technology (via instant messaging) allowed me to keep in contact with them between sundays and have deeper, more interesting and thought-provoking conversations about life and ourselves than we ever could have had with our parents listening in from the next pew or room over.
When I got married at nineteen and got pregnant immediately afterwards and lost my friends because they thought I was marrying a heretic and because I had no car/transportation to get to the ones who didn't, online forums of people from a similar background as mine, many of them women who had also married young and were trapped at home with young children became my only social outlet. We would have quite literally gone crazy without each other; for most of us, there were no IRL people that could have provided that or supported us. We walked together away from fundamentalism and to varying degrees, religion in its entirety. It was a good thing for everyone except those who wanted to hold us back and "know our place". The offline human connection was a toxic one.
Were there ever miscommunications and disagreements and misunderstandings? Heck yeah. For the most part, they were worked out. Via text. Because we all lived in different states or countries. This is how real life works too: there are misunderstandings. You work through them.
Communicating primarily via text does not cause misunderstandings. Variety and diversity of cultures and backgrounds and assumptions causes misunderstandings. AND YET experiencing diversity is still a good thing that makes people better humans.
I recently, for the first time in ten years, have managed to make a local friend. If it weren't for the internet and the technology we use it with, I don't know that I would have made it through those ten years alive. People who decry technology as this terrible thing that removes human connection--they don't seem to understand the reality of not being able to find that offline.
@mistymoon77 Not to mention the lack of punctuation, grammar & spelling. They were taught for a reason. Some need to learn...for a reason.
@maribus This post is strictly pertaining to relationships. It is and has caused many issues in society which is proven to be with texting and driving but that is not what this post is about. Its focusing on lack of the correct communication between people in relationships as why I posted under this category.
@Countrywoman not all people have a way with words and punctuation. That is also one of the problems why texting can be a deterrent for some. How many times do you see a couple sitting across from each other and they aren't even talking or sharing anything. How many times have dates been interrupted out of disrespect for the that person because of getting texts and the list goes on and on.
@mistymoon77 Without correct punctuation,grammar & spelling, meanings are misconstruded . A comma, a wrong use of the word to,too,two, can lauch a nuclear missle or make someone angry at me. That is why I posted it here & replied to your response to me. Work on these things say the retired teacher who gave Trump a "D" in these rules of English.
@mistymoon77 My bad, I didn't notice this was categorized under "Love and Relationships"
@Countrywoman Yes and that is part of the problem as I the post is stating in a sense where not everyone has or knows about correct grammar. Not everyone got an A in English class. And to top off auto correct is not always "correct" which then leads to issues as well.
@maribus It's not about the technology and how it has helped people stay in contact with family and which there are so many good things about that very aspect of it. This goes deeper than that which is what I felt this particular post fit under this category so well because of the problems it has caused for so many relationships.
@StilInterested. Not really.
Every form of human communication is error prone. We miscommunicate and misinterpret most of the time, whether we are face to face or distant. In person we can pick up on non-verbal queues, which helps most of us.
I personally think the current political situation in the US is causing most of the troubles with society, because it is dividing people into haves and have nots. It is blaming the innocent for woes of society, pushing drugs onto despondent masses, preventing people from having health, wealth, and happiness. There are many factors for our society failing, but technology is not one IMO.
Technology is a tool and like any tool can be used or abused.
That I totally agree with.
I feel that it started with emails and got worse with texting and tweeting being the worst. We are missing out on interpersonal relationships and filling in with bytes
It's ironic that technology is being blammed for the breakdown of human communication when technology is the only reason this group of people is communicating at all right now. Tech is a great way to meet people and keep up with information.
Agree with you in theory but then we need to do more communicating if it is someone we want to know on a more personal level. I've watched a table of young people out to dinner together and everyone is on their phones rather than interacting with each other. We need to use technology as a bridge to better human interaction
I had another thought too. Yes it is technology that has allowed this group to get together but I think we have a responsibility to answer in ways that almost mimic telephone or in person conversations. I have seen a lot of posts that may only be one or 2 sentences long and if I want to answer in a way that promotes dialogue I need to ask a question and answer in a way that says, " well if this is what you mean then........" If I in turn give a 1 sentence response that is meant to shut them down then I am not being responsible for assisting this website to be a place of dialog.
@AmelieMatisse tech is just a tool like a screwdriver or a gun. It is not inherently bad or good. It is uo to humans to determine how it is used....at least until it becomes self aware and self modifying anyway. Then it's not up to us anymore. But for now it is humans causing the problem. For instance, i anyone in this group dislikes this method of communication they can always ask for contact detaiks and meet in person or on the phone or video call/confrence. Of course that requires means less physical and emotional safety so most people are afraid of that and remain in the facebook/forum method of communication.
I’m sure people said the same thing when telephones were invented.
They were at least talking to each other.
@mistymoon77 yeah and at least on the phone you can get an idea of the to be of the conversation based on voice inflection, which is easier than figuring out emojis ?????
@AmelieMatisse yes, there is so much of a breakdown in communication because people will interpret things different than if it were down face to face. Anyone can write crap, show emoticons but that doesn't reflect anything the person is feeling for real.
And yet this complaint is being communicated using the very same thing its condemning. I (me, speaking for myself) find this ironic
Time to cue in Alanis Morrisette. Loved that song. Also loved her as god in the movie Dogma
@AmelieMatisse Henry remember that movie and he likes Alanis, she does have a powerful voice..... but not sure I can figure the relationship here...which song? (You know Henry, when in doubt he will ask)
@IamNobody Henry it is her song "Isn't it Ironic" it is perfect with your comment
@AmelieMatisse aahhhh... Gee, I am getting to a point in my life where coffee doesn't help as much ???? I should've know that one !!!! .... Here is the punch line... isn't it ironic ??!! ?
You live by the phone, you get destroyed by the phone. GIGO
You live by the phone, you get destroyed by the phone. GIGO
One tactic might be to collect all cell phones before a restaurant meal, forcing people to look up at the others.
I love to read Kindle books at the table on my tablet-it's a way to relax, so I find it difficult to make myself turn if off and pay attention to someone else.
Luckily, I'm single and usually eating alone.
I have been saying this for years. plain words do not communicate emotions and feelings !
But they do communicate.
Yes, they do. That's what words are for, is to express emotion and feeling.
However, it's certainly true that many people don't know how to use their words.
@jlynn37 so many words & added on expletives can be misread which causes more problems & escalates the issue more so than to see body language, hear human voice, feel what is being said.
@mistymoon77 I can't argue with that.
@mistymoon77
I don't disagree with you at all !