I have never been with a man that couldn't cook. Sharing the kitchen is eyeopening, fun and sexy.

Some men and some women like to cook. Some men and some women don't. Negotiations take place. People get fed. Same goes for cleaning, barn-raising, childrearing, farming, vehicle maintenance, warring, sewing, dentistry, decorating, accounting, manufacturing, undertaking, entertaining, governing, grounds-keeping, educating, researching, law-enforcing, road-building, piloting, nursing, sewage-management, appliance repairing, dog-walking, mining, haircutting, firefighting, and goat-milking. Meal-taking only needs to happen three times a day. Electrical generation, on the other hand, needs to be done unceasingly around the clock. Fortunately, these days, all of it can be outsourced. Nobody does it all, and nobody should be expected to do any of it against their will or without agreed upon compensation. That said... hopefully, intimate partnership is based on something other than the exchange of goods and services.

I will soon read the previous 104 comments.
My take:
There is a subculture, of women that have a need to be mommies
There is a subculture of men, that need to be mommied

May they find each other

As a (former) husband/partner and a father, I have always shared in domestic responsibilities. I've bathed my kids, changed their diapers, helped to raise them. With regard to culinary skill, I wouldn't say I'm a good cook, but I can read and follow a recipe. I have cooked several meals from scratch this way and they came out well. Despite coming in at the tail end of the Baby Boomer period, I feel I'm pretty modern in my attitude towards domestic partnership. I know it has to be a shared responsibility. @Redcupcoffee, my mom became an excellent cook over time, but she never taught me anything in that area. Blaming mothers for their son's failings is a bit unfair. Men have to own their shit. LOL!

I love good food and grew up in a house where everything was boiled or burnt or both, so I learned to cook at the age of 13 by watching The Galloping Gourmet everyday after I got home from school. I became an excellent cook (so I am told) with a cooking regimen that spans everything from down home cooking to sushi to Thai and French and Moroccan. I have found that the way to a beautiful woman's heart is through her stomach (among other routes) and I dated many lovely ladies who enjoyed my culinary skills as well as the rest of me. I finally found the woman I can call my best friend and lover to the end of my days a few decades ago and I even taught her how to cook. This was my mistake because now she has invaded my kitchen in retirement and insists on cooking at least half of the time which is cramping my style. My wonderful wife still uses recipes for the most part (so amateur) and she does call upon my expertise to check that things have been sufficiently cooked and seasoned but I do miss my exclusive to me kitchen. It's my own damn fault of course for encouraging her interest in good quality food, so I will leave it at this point but I caution you to be careful what you ask for, you may lose your kitchen to a wannabe cook.

I don't know much about anything but I can say this... Chopping veggies or working on a pico de gallo, to me it's geometry and I can slice onions, tomatoes and peppers to perfection. Beautiful small symmetrical shapes and my wife hates it with a vengeance because she can't do it. One of the very very very few things I have the edge on

I've run into the same thing in the dating world. I had one man tell me that his mother was an amazing cook, to which my reply was and you don't know how to cook? He said he never felt like he would need to because there would always be a woman in his life to do it for him. Needless to say that was our last date. So many people think that going back to women staying at home with kids leads to better children, but I say it leads to bored Housewives who raised kids who expect to be waited on hand and foot. The old saying is a man who knows how to cook knows how to.... well you can guess the rest. Cooking a meal together is a great way for a couple to spend time together and bond. it's kind of sexy to me

I must live in some alternate universe. Every guy I know cooks. Married or single, we all cook, shop at the grocery store, and do laundry. My wife does the same chores I do. We share the load.

Some women don't know how to cook either! Let me tell you a 100% true story.

My old roommates girl came over. He asked her to cook a FROZEN PIZZA. She said she didn't know how to do it. He said read the instructions on the back. So she finally figured out how to turn the oven on. A while later, something was burning. It was the pizza. She said "I didn't know you had to check on it". She was close to her 21st bday.

I have always cooked. My ex wife only knew two settings on the stove, off and 10. This was todays dinner at 8AM before simmering for 8 hours, pasta sauce. Plus I made garlic bread from day old French bread. Had my mom over for dinner, she took home a serving, and I have 6 more servings in the freezer.

Coming up behind me when I'm chopping is a good way to get stabbed.

I can't deal with the "helpless" male. Unless he's under the age of 5.

The world has changed, but I do feel that you're bringing issues from previous relationships into new ones. For instance, although some of them may not know how to cook, a softer approach could lead to them learning from you, & bringing you both closer. Also, many men could & did cook in the 60's, surely?

I know where you're coming from, however. I clearly remember my father being abusive to my mother because dinner took too long to prepare after he returned home from work. Never mind that she did the lion's share of parenting six children as well. I'm glad that times have changed, & I hope that you find someone that suits you.

I just don’t get that. I’m no gourmet in the kitchen but I can make it happen. I actually prefer cook with someone and for someone other than myself. I believe the whole experience friend cooking. eating cleaning up can and should be a shared experience for a couple. It’s an obvious and simple way share and grow closer. I believe in the idea of making “the hearth” and it’s activities the center of the home.

I used to be a Chef, so I'm the one who does most of the cooking.
I don't do it for a job any more, but I love doing it for friends.

When my late wife worked at a call center,I'd get us up in the morning and while she showered make breakfast, eggs and bacon maybe ,and get her out the door in time for work, at dinner time I'd have the meal ready when she drove in the garage. Chicken oven baked,ribs,maybe an all day slow cooker with pork and sauerkraut. Easy stuff.

I love to cook, so many different things to try. I keep threatening to buy my self a wok to home cook Asian authentic. I have dated women in the past that could barely burn cornflakes.

my guy can't cook. once when i was sick i asked him to cook, and i had to give him instructions one step at a time. i told him to peel an onion. i told him how. three hours later, and i am not exaggerating, he was done. he had sliced the onion and then peeled each slice.

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I can cook a bit. I live on my own. To cook for myself, I never bother too much, just to feed myself in a satisfactory manner. Cooking for a few friends, that gives me a kick. I don't do it often, unfortunately. It's always a good thing when you can cook a bit.

My ex husband and I always cooked together, it was fun, included music, and playful times. He taught me a lot about Brazilian cuisine and I taught him about Greek cuisine. We learned, grew, and enjoyed many delicious meals together. I also had an ex who hadn’t a clue, but I taught him, because everyone should know how to cook. Also, it’s no fun to feel like you absolutely must cook, I’m not a personal chef.

I love to learn and help in the kitchen. I make my own healthy meals, they may not be the best, but it's not a competition.

After my divorce, I hired a cook to come in and prepare meals once a week. It was fun chatting and watching her cook and eventually I learned enough to feed myself reasonably well. Later, I learned quite a lot more from doing Blue Apron meals and I now am able to enjoy cooking for myself and friends. Cooking turns out to be fun, especially when done with a partner.

Not knowing how to cook must be very disempowring!

What year is this ? ?

I seemed to be the primary chef in my previous partnerships. At one time I had over 200 cookbooks. My last/late partner could cook circles around me. She had a business and a web-site (Taste of Persia Lopez). However, it was not fair that she did all the cooking (plus she was gone a lot). Some of my recipes she didn't care for so I would mark the items in the books as PA (Parvin Approved) or NPA (not approved).

You would think that anyone who can read can cook, but I think it takes a higher degree of creativity, attention to detail, rhythm, and history of experimentation to pull a meal together at once than anyone even gives themselves credit for.

I didnt really cook much growing up, but I paid attention and tried to help mom n grandparents when I could. When I moved away for college and began living on my own, and later while taking care of my grandmother I developed a passion for it.

learned all sorts of fried dishes, breakfast, soulfood n cookout things from my stepgrandfather who was a short order cook and baker (among having every job in the village people at some point).

My grandma used to love my omlettes; shes been on a feeding tube now and I dearly wish I could make her another one. Im proud that I did get to make an entire thanksgiving dinner for her and my mom the last year before grandma needed assisted living.

Theres no excuse for being too helpless to slice a fruit of course, but my dad is one of those people that I wouldnt trust to cook rice from a package. His IQ must barely make it to triple digits. Mom did all our cooking growing up but I think Ive surpassed her technique in a lot of areas.

Stepgrandad had grandma beat there for sure too. Im glad I learned how to be a man from him and not my dad. I was good at it immediately n only had a couple failed cooking experiments ever, although it took those and a lot of mostly successful experiments to get proficiently confident at cooking many things at once. Drunken cooking was my favorite sport for a few years and I created some masterpieces ? Ive yet plenty to learn, but Im definitely not gonna starve.