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Guess what time it is? Its Ancient Alien weekend, Again! Thank you History Channel for teaching me all the tricks and trades of the historical individuals known as "Ancient Astronaut Theorists."

Sadoi 7 Jan 26
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15 comments

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1

Just when you thought tv couldn’t suck more..

Yup. It sucks more. Lol

1

Hmmm... I dread the day they come again and whose going to try to shoot them down. A alien that can travel 40 million light years scares me. Or fold time or get close to a black hole or anything else that can get them here in a short time....lol.

Yeah, basically we are the ants on the anthill at that point, which means we are fuuucked! Lol

2

I am old enough to remember when the history channel had actual history, also when there was music on MTV.

Funny, just had this exact convo a few days ago. I, too, remember!

1

I'm not saying it was aliens, but it was
Giorgio Tsoukalos' hair.

I'm not saying it was aliens either, but it could've been his pubes,too!

1

Wait..is this a thing on here?..like, you know a Thing?, like that Secret Society in the FBI? I know I'm new an all, but can I join?...umm I swear I'll Dooooo anything to joooinah..er.thanks.
Is this about old illegals?

Oh they are sold alright! As for legal... Well I don't think our laws would apply to them. Lol. "Where we're going Marty, we don't need roads!"

@Sadoi
Ahhh the old road less traveled thing huh?...

@Charlene YES! haha

@Sadoi
Oh for fuck sake..I thought this site was for enlightenment..Jaaazuz!

@Charlene you mean Datertainment?? hahahah!!

@Sadoi Yas that too

1

They are brainstorming.

About where to probe us! Yikes!

3

Again with the goon show, marvellous!

This suits the subject material slightly better.

@Dav87 Love it !!

Hahaha!!!

3

I have to start watching that show again....I wonder if these aliens appreciate being called 'ancient'....seems rather derogatory....no wonder they run around probing the crap out of people...

Oh yes indeed they DO probe the Crap Out of people! Haha. Well they didn't realize ancient was an insult until they asked to meet with the most ancient of ancients and Phyllis Diller was brought before them. After that, the angry probing phase began.

@Sadoi Intrstk't d'Tu, bring out the extra long probe!

@JohnnyThorazine the elephant trunk probe please!

@Sadoi I don't mean to be a stickler, Mr.Alien, but you missed a spot...hehe

@JohnnyThorazine "mr alien, i said farther in..." haha

1

My theory is that ancient aliens are a weak hypothesis.

I think Gio would reply that the ancient aliens theory contradicts your hypothetical theory, thus:. Ancient aliens are Reeal!

2

What was it this week, McDonalds on Pluto? 🙂

Nope! Jack in the Box!

3

Popcorn, CHECK
Beer, CHECK
Google device to check "facts", CHECK
Foil hat, CHECK
GO! GO! GO!

Script from episode #666
"ON TODAY'S EPISODE OF ANCIENT ALIENS, HOW ANCIENT ASTRONAUT THEORISTS KNOW THE PYRAMIDS ARE REALLY SPACE SHIPS FILLED WITH GREY ALIENS AND PEANUT BUTTER"

camera cuts to David Childress
"well, it's quite clear when looking at the pyramidal shape of the pyramids from underneath, taking a cross section of the quarts filled sandstone that we can see that square is also math, this to me has proven beyond reasonable doubt that Egyptian aliens could tell the time, time and space are linked and quartz vibrates in a conclusive manner which can only mean space travel"

prop staff secure Giorgio to the ceiling ready for interview (always film Giorgio upside down).

Giorgio.
"I met a guy who knew a guy who met a guy who lived somewhere not on any map that saw grey humanoid aliens board the pyramids on one leg, they hopped right in, I was then fortunate enough to meet with Erich Von Daniken who told me grey aliens really dig peanut butter and sugary treats this clearly means that the pyramids are filled with peanut butter, there's not a doubt in my mind THEY HAVE COME HERE TO MINE THE PLANET FOR PEANUT BUTTER!"

prop staff, please remember to remove Georgio from the ceiling. He was everso upset that you left him up overnight last time.

FOR 43 MINUTES X 10 episodes a weekend!!!!! I can't describe the joy of this show.

Dav87 Level 6 Jan 27, 2018

Hahaha

Wait, your forgot a viral portion of that theory. What about the Sphinx's stash of strawberry jelly?? It was my understanding that the theory also included the information about how the crop circles were the ways in which the Grey's left notes for one another about how to find the jelly stash... Remember? I mean, even Gio said, "what same minded alien would want ONLY peanut butter? OBVIOUSLY they came to raid our stash of jelly as well!". Next thing you know, there gonna want a cheese and fruit platter too!

Wait a second... Ancient aliens theorists must realize all the aliens really want is to throw one, giant galactic Paaaarty!

@Sadoi I had a power cut and missed that part of the episode! It makes so much more sense now!

@Dav87 Its like this:

2

Treat yourself....have a lovely snack, or a shot, every time they use qualifiers such as "May have" or "possibly" or "might" in one hour. Warning! You will gain a minimum or 10 lbs or need your stomach pumped!

Isn't that what aliens do in their spacecraft with those of us taken? They probe you and pump your stomach to analyze the contents?

Hahaha! I'll remain on standby with medical charcoal and all the necessary stomach pumping accessories!

1

It's fascinating entertaining fiction.

What's most fascinating is how big gios hair becomes from season to season, progressively! I come for the aliens. I stay for the hair! 😉

4

develops faster than light travel
shows bald apes how to meticulously pile rocks into pleasing geometric shapes
laughter ensues

Hahaha I think you just summed up 90% of the episodes on the show!

3

Trust no one. grin

The Truth is Out There.

Except the aliens Mulder...

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