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31 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.Media is scaring the bejesus out of everyone with reportings of this virus.
DenoPenno
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
2
It's Ad Revenue...unfortunatly all our stuff comes from China and they aren't making SHIT...and the Markets are collapsing...brace for another "BAILOUT"...and watch the money go straight into the "BONUS VORTEX"...thievin fuckers.
Now's the time to picket churches with signs that say, "Where's your messiah now?"
Stupid fuckers.
(All I can hear is Edward G. Robinson's voice saying that.)
KKGator
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
8
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....your twisted...I admire the HELL out of that.
In my bad old days I volunteered for a local church. We told the priest we were out of 'holy water' so he said to bring him the official pitcher. He filled it with tap water and did some mumbo jumbo over it and presto holy water.
JackPedigo
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
7
LOL! I love this site. The comments are brilliant!!
silverotter11
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
7
Good. So holy water isn't that holy, is it?
LiterateHiker
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
5
Not covered under the Power Train Warranty...Customer Abuse. 
They'll probably start 'blessing' sani-wipes and sell them three for a buck.
Silver1wun
Level 7
Mar 10, 2020
5
Duh! Don't you know holy water only works against vampires and demons. I expect a demon outbreak any day now.
GeorgeRocheleau
Level 8
Mar 9, 2020
5
Look for it to start in D.C.
@phoenixone1 we already have one sitting in the W.H..
This is absolutely hilarious. The irony is palpable. Who’s praying for you now. 
I’m probably going to hell for this but the virus can’t live in heat; I think 
DiThor
Level 6
Mar 9, 2020
5
LMAO!!
It's just an unfounded rumor that the COVID-19 virus cannot survive the heat of summer. COVID-19 is unlike any virus we've seen to date.
Flu cases may decrease during the summer when people get outdoors. But flu illness rares up even stronger in the fall.
Hopefully it will hate the SE
@LiterateHiker
It has just been reported today that heat does help with virus. Also if you have a dry cough and a runny nose you do not have the virus. I had to laugh when I read that advice from some medical professional. So I’m thinking lots of hot baths...maybe even with a special friend. 
we have to try to find the bright side of this.
Seems logical to do so...not that logic is usually their strongest reason for doing something!
Marionville
Level 10
Mar 10, 2020
4
Looks like their magic is working! I'm talking about Penn and Teller....
TheGreatShadow
Level 9
Mar 9, 2020
4
Oh, what a weak god they have, who can't even cleanse a bit of water!
BestWithoutGods
Level 8
Mar 10, 2020
3
Don't they know that blessing the water removes all of the sickness demons? Even if they wipe asses the old fashioned way followed by rinsing fingers, the gods have them covered. Where is their faith?? Jesus saves; especially on toilet paper! Glory!!
Silver1wun
Level 7
Mar 10, 2020
3
this reminds me of the three young women who went to confession. You've probably heard it. The first one is told to wash your hands in the holy water, and the second one is told to gargle with it. Meanwhile, without being told, the third one sits in
BitFlipper
Level 8
Mar 10, 2020
3
Yes, that's an old one, although I must confess when I heard it, the 1st girl, based on her confession, was told to wash her hands in holy water, while the 2nd was directed to wash her breasts. As the two were busy washing, the 3rd showed up saying, 'move over girls, I have to gargle.' At least that is what I remember from decades past.
@p-nullifidian that's how it is with jokes.
I'm not so familiar with the Catholic faith, does that mean absolution is fucking totally out of the question?
Archeus_Lore
Level 7
Mar 9, 2020
3
Nope
The standard reply to that would of course be..."IT'S ALL PART OF GODS PLAN".
not the donation basket ? Haha
coregonz4
Level 3
Mar 9, 2020
3
Oh Noooooooo...that NEVER gets cut off...
@phoenixone1 god needs a damn accountant.
@TattedIrishXx needs a bigger bank and more tax loopholes...and another Jet for the minister...a mink stole for the wife...a new Lexus for the Mistress...I could go on forever...I hate the con artist bastards...
I guess it must not be as holy as it should be....LOL
Smitty6810
Level 3
Mar 11, 2020
2
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