This will probably seem antagonistic, but I don't mean it that way. I first stumbled into the social network world back in the days of "newsgroups" in the early 90's. Mostly, the groups I belonged to were professional or hobby oriented. Like the current genre--including agnostic.com, Facebook, twitter, etc), any time a discussion became about anything other than fixing or designing equipment I found it to be . . . discomforting. I have to wonder if there is something flawed about this medium that causes people to jump to attack mode without any concern for offending others, making enemies, and being the loudest voice in the room?
I'm 72 and still learning about myself, including discovering what the "I" in INTP meant for the direction my life took, a little of what losing my mother when I was 9 (and she was 34) did to my life, and how much it cost me to live most of my life in the shadow of Midwestern religion and superstition. No going back, of course, but I wonder what the value of the social networking is to others. Is it a comfort or does it just stoke the fires of existing passions? Do you feel better knowing there are people with similar (lack of) beliefs or is it confusing and discomforting to find that there are people who have apparently escaped the irrationally of superstition but cling to every other unproven and harmful traditional value?
To be honest, the current social distancing climate is fine with me. I have not found many people who contribute much to my life. I've been married for 50-some years and have a small but loving family and if I lost that I would have no problem becoming a hermit. So, it's a stretch for me to imagine how all of this is suppose to add value.
Welcome..
Our Atheist President Lincoln lost his mom when he was about 8 ......he built a social network of lawyers judges and the 3 women of his life step mom, masseuse and Mary Todd.....won a 2 year job in Springfield lost re-election won a seat 2 years in Congress lost re-election as a Whig joined the new Iowa Republican Party and lost his SENATE race to slavery Denocrat Douglas.all of this is social networking by letter by speeches by newspapers by telegrams......politics was the only entertainment then ....except for Mark Twain Atheist weekly book chapters sold by mail ..... speak up write a note and see how people respond....since you are married there may be zero romance here for you .....there have been Atheist events like CHAUTAUQUA tent summers and Atheist conventions for 140 years...seek and ye shall find ....don't cast your pearls before swine xians
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It comforting that a site like this exists and that it's ad free!
And free.
I find it liberating to discuss topics with intelligent people without reference or submission to any mythological protocols. I can't do that with most people I encounter IRL, although there are some I call friend with whom I also have that freedom.
During this lockdown, it also serves as a point of contact with the outside world and lessens any feelings of isolation.
I guess it's not for everybody. It was never designed to be for everybody. The value you get out of a medium like this depends on how much you exert yourself to provide value. You can say that about pretty much anything.
Like everyplace else, though, we got assholes here too. What are you gonna do?
I m comforted to find like minds who ‘get me’ without the judgement, proselytizing, and self-righteousness of the religious(though a few militant anti theists can be the same way).
I’ve found atheist/agnostic groups for chronic illness support, which is invaluable. Even past the absence of ‘I’ll pray for you’, I’m making reali life friends. It’s ok that we may never meet in person due to illness factors that hinder travel; many of us have LOCAL family/friends who are close in miles but miles away in all the ways that count, we are still THERE for each other.
I find a great deal of comfort.
Of course, people are still people. Being atheist/agnostic is not always equivalent to being enlightened.
For me, the "comfort" is in interacting with people who aren't completely delusional.
Squirrel!
One always feel better when one knows one is not alone. Always
Sometimes I hear a noise in the middle of the night, but it's just the ice cube maker, and I am very glad that I'm alone.
@CallMeDave Can you turn it off?
The fact that the others here are nonbelievers too is secondary to my enjoyment of the social interaction with members on the site who live in diverse geographical locations, mostly on the other side of the world. I now have a greater understanding of American society and everyday life in various parts of the USA, Canada & Australia, and the appreciation of how much more freedom I have here in the UK to not believe in god and the fact that nobody really bats an eyelid when I say I’m an atheist...unlike many who live in certain parts of the USA.
Have I found comfort here? Well I’ve found I have a lot in common with many others, my taste in music and opinions on many other subjects have found sympathetic ears, that has had a comforting effect. I have also found some stimulating contrary views, which is satisfying in a different way, but not what I’d describe as comfortable. Some of the exchanges I’ve had have been fun, some thought-provoking and a very small number have been downright insulting..but the overall result is they’ve been on the whole enjoyable enough to keep me here for almost 2 years. I don’t know if those with a different personality type from me, I’m an extrovert, would enjoy the interaction here on Agnositcs as much as I do, but I have found this venture into social media very satisfying indeed.
I enjoy your posts!
@CarolinaGirl60 Thank you! That’s nice to know.
SAME ,,nicely put <huggs
@BBJong Hugs back!
Well said Marion. I'm a fan.
I am surrounded by believers: family, community. I need an outlet. I need a place where I can go and say exactly what I am thinking. I do have a couple of atheist nephews with whom I can speak openly; but, sadly, I don't get to see them very often.
Yes, sometimes it can be an echo chamber; but, sometimes, that might be what someone needs. And, there is always someone, at some point, who will throw a curve ball that will boggle my mind (an atheist who thinks there might be ghosts, for instance).
I also like to think that I can offer words of support or wisdom (from experience) now and again to someone who is still struggling; because I went through a lengthy and anxiety-filled deconversion process, I know what it is like.
It is comforting to be in a place where at least people are free from religious prejudice. People here are more liberal, which greatly limits the problem of politics too. It all depends on what you expect from this place: I am here to have a good time, I laugh writing and reading comments and jokes. I listen to new music, share feelings and in some groups the sense of aesthetics, I also have a sense of brotherhood.
There are days when I am addicted and others when I do not enter. This is like a glass of wine: if you like it, or if you drink it or not, and how often you do it, how's your experience when drinking it, it all depends on each person and their own experience
" I have not found many people who contribute much to my life.".
Seriously? I'm a hard core introvert but when I think of the funniest stuff that's ever happened to me, the moments that brought an abundance of joy, that even lasts decades via recollection, there is always another person involved. I mean another mind who saw a situation from a different angle and said or did something that struck me as brilliant or hilarious or, yes, sometimes idiotic or asinine. The unexpected and surprising is best, and that usually requires another mind present.
Interesting. Not long ago, after a few friends recommended I read "Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" and, finally, one friend bought the eBook and gifted it to me, I sort of felt like I'd been in a fog for most of my 72 years; pretending (for survival and work's sake) to be someone else. Not that different from avoiding religious discussions in the Midwest for the same period. Looking back now, I realize that my social and business interactions cost me so much energy that it would often take me days to get over the stress of meetings and such. I've never been short of having plenty of moments with people, but many or most of my favorite memories are of times when I was on a motorcycle in the middle of nowhere or camping in an isolated place with plenty of quiet. Probably another personality flaw.
It is nice to be in a place where I can express my knowledge freely, without getting attacked. The Bible says to "love your neighbor as yourself," but if I mention (no matter how kindly I say it) to a Christian that religion is a scam based on mythology, they are likely to shift into the hypocrite mode, and treat me scornfully. On this forum, most people are more understanding.
"Scornfully", that is rather mild. I've usually found that what they start talking about is the threat of burning in the eternal fire.
I live in a city full of churches and hospitals. If I talk against religion it's a fair bet that I could possibly wind up in one of our hospitals.
@IAJO163 Be safe! Christians can sometimes be very militant.
@BestWithoutGods I've always said that god wouldn't kill me. Man would in his name.
@IAJO163 That could be the way I go, too. If anyone starts talking to me about religion, I tell them that I am an atheist, and if they want to convince me that they have the truth, they will have to back it up with facts and evidence. That usually scares them away. But some day it may be the end of me.
Being a realist, especially an agnostic, I believe causes more stress. The reality is that there are things we don't know, but 'when we know it all', we will be able to create a universe ourselves. Obviously that is not going to happen. For those who enjoy tattered nonsense, there is always the soothing huggy-bear of religion.
I prefer reality.
..way more than I care to wade through … so I’ll stick to the initial Q.
Yes, and No.. It’s comforting beyond description not to be surrounded by sniveling, envious, angry, evil-enabling followers.. But it’s somewhat intimidating to realize how independent, well educated, and confrontational Atheists & Agnostics are
Yes, the fact that I can put things I wouldn’t put on Facebook, as it may offend my friends and family, brings me comfort; as does having a place to be my agnostic self.
As for this site, I’ve found it a good sounding board and a place where people are also learning and have different life experiences to me. There are a few people that I actually look forwards to seeing comments from and others that challenge me; which is an opportunity to educate myself at times.
Knowing what to expect and the context of our interaction, is also comfortable for me. This site works for me
Very well said, except for the comma splice at the end.
@CallMeDave (I edited the above). I’m sorry, it’s a very long time since I studied English
I made my comment about this down below, but I wanted to say this about Facebook: it is a boring place where I am just because I can see photos and daily life of my children and Grandkids who are not with me. It is generally just yards and yards of posts of foods and dishes, endless photos of someone else's kids, stupid posts like 'I'm in the Cheesecake Factory' or 'I'm here at the airport ready to go to...', then chain posts like: "if you are a good friend send this to 10 friends. I expect you to send it back to me" or the religious chains that you have to resend if you want to avoid tragedy, the ones that post a child lost or sick, or a dog or a cat lost in Venezuela or Azerbaijan. And worst of all now crowded with commercials!
You need different friends on Facebook. I block anyone that sends me a chain message.
I do not generally need "comfort" , I want social interaction. And yes, I learned about Wordfeud on here, to which I am now addicted.
COOL
I'm here because atheists are mostly cool people, and if some of them also turn out to be foxy - tant mieux!
Foxy ... now there's a term I haven't heard since Hendrix was still with us!
@p-nullifidian my only paycheck tv show had Foxy as the best actress ran several years on cable/Satellite shot on location of an old Navy base
If you don't need social network, you don't need it. Some people do. I like this group because I find it relaxing to be able to say what I like without having to wonder whom I might offend, not that it's all that big of a worry for me anywhere else. Social media can be a pleasant outlet, especially during a quarantine. I can use it on my own terms and make of it what I want. It's okay if it's not your cup of tea.
I find tea offensive
@CallMeDave I suspect that teacups are shady too. I know -I- stay clear.
I just tell religious people I don't understand religion or politics. Been an agnostic all my life, I find Religion dose more harm than good.
I do understand the laws of nature and nature would be my religion.
I have the.comfort knowing most conversation about religion, I can easily convert them back to nature.
Naturally.
To me all knowledge brings comfort (even when others can't handle this knowledge and get into name calling). I seriously believe all life is about evolving and for us humans evolving means learning and knowledge. We do have the facilities to discern whether that knowledge is true or false and change direction. The biggest fallicy of all is religion, heaven, hell and some stupid self-serving supreme being. Yes, comfort lies in getting away from that fallicy!
As an ENFP/ENTP, I don't find Agnostic.com to be discomforting at all but instead I find it stimulating to converse with people who are free thinkers and have the courage to live outside of religious society. I don't think that I would define it as comforting but that's the difference between an Extrovert and an Introvert.
However, I do believe that we get out of life what we put into it and that applies to Agnostic.com as well.
As an introvert, it is an easier way to connect. I enjoy discussion with others who think about things.
Social distancing is not a problem for an introvert, but I wish I had the comfort of a family.
Yea, one of my very few things I would have done differently is, I kinda regret never getting around to having kids. I always doubted myself and said when I am more stable financially and have my s--t together better I will, but by the time that happened, It was too late.
Ah, well.
Thanks for reminding me to be grateful for my kid.
@echosam That's kind how it went with me, though there was a time, before it was too late, that I was more ready, but my partner at the time did not want any more kids. He had two from his previous marriage and already had a vasectomy. I should have left sooner. But it's not like I was going to jump into another relationship just to have kids.
,,,my family priest , deacon , - careful , I am ready to change my name