Two women once knocked on my door and asked me if I know where I'm going after I die. I said, "Oh yes!" They quizzically asked me, "Where?" I responded, "Dirt nap" and slammed the door. They must have placed their magic Jesus mark on my door because I haven't had a knock like that since.

I ignore but 10 years ago my ex would answer the door after a bong rip and exhale as he opened the door. He’d always offer them a rip, once he came really close to having JWs in my living room passing a pipe.

Should have said, sure you can have a minute of my families time! But you'll have to talk to our dog. The rest of us are kind of busy.

Something like this, eh?

Kudos! Best time I ever had with these people was right after the Jim Jones mass suicide by KoolAid back in the 70s (I know--I'm old). I'd just gotten off from my nighttime taxi driving shift, and had poured a healthy quantity of bourbon into a coffee cup because all the glasses were dirty. I was sitting on the front porch, and these two guys came up and started in on the same JW spiel as you got. I'd already drunk half my cup of bourbon and was starting to get a buzz. They couldn't see what was in the cup, so I said, "I'm sorry, I already have a church I go to. I belong to the People's Temple." Lifting my cup, I continued, "Y'all want to come in and have some KoolAid?" Those guys boogied off my porch, and I finished my drink and went to bed.

Good doggie.

I put a red "No solicitors" sticker on our mailbox after making the mistake of letting a Kirby vacuum salesperson in the house and couldn't get rid of her without threatening to call the police.
It was only tested once after by an Xfinity sales lady who threatened to call the police on my dog after he reacted to her persistent knocking by pushing his head through the screen while I was cooking dinner. SHE got the police called on her and a call to her employer. Ignore no solicitors sign and threaten my dog at your peril.

Have you seen this show? It is not Jehovah's Witnesses but it is funny.

Thats telling them. But can we help them to become people that know sience and believe in it instead of bullshit?

There are people like the LDS that have been brainwashed since birth. They will do whatever they are being told.
Yes I tell them too to go hell and not bother me but....... is there a way to help them?

Well done!!! Good dog!

This was an opportunity for you to witness to them They need to be saved from wasting their time, money, and emotional energy on a fictional story. Next time go for it.

Last time JWs showed up to my door (in 2000) they asked my religious affiliation. Told them I was a wiccan. They asked whats that & I told them, "you know....a witch. But that word has a lot of baggage". They could not leave fast enough, literally backed away from me & 1 of the 4 kept etes on me at all times. They even backed out my driveway & caught a gear leaving. Pretty sure the black cat climbing up the inside of my screen door didn't help. Haven't had a visit since.

I've always wanted to buy a devil suit for occasions like this. Could you imagine the looks on their faces if I opened the door and I was dressed like Lucifer!?

I actually had 2 guys come into my barn while I was shearing and complain to me that they had been there numerous times and were ticked because I was wasting their time

My dog Sassy is a German Shepherd who will do her job and bark whenever Holy Rollers attempt to reach my door.

Beautiful, should have let the dog loose. lol

I love it!

And they always accuse the rest of us of having an agenda.

Had a similar experience , when I told them I was an atheist so please go away they said " could they come in , they could help me " Ha ha , my dog was wagging her tail as if to welcome them. . I shut the door and off they went with several others to "help some one else " !

Excellent!

I once lived on the 3rd floor of a brownstone. It was summer time and was awoken by the doorbell. I thought my Mum had left her keys and so I wrapped myself in my sheets and went downstairs. There were 2 women at the door. Anyway, when I told them that I needed to get back to bed, one asked for a donation for the pamphlets she wanted to leave with me. I proudly showed her that I had no pockets on me and thanked them for coming and climbed back upstairs. After that, I would look out the window before I traipsed downstairs

I love your dog!
When my son finished high school, I went away for a few months, leaving him and some mates home alone. The Joho;s (Jehovas Witnesses} called, my son and his mates are polite and very intelligent so engaged in their discussions, each side giving their own point of view. This actually encouraged the Johos to visit more regularly, often different ones, maybe to get practice without getting a door slammed in their faces. My guys didn't mind and told me the discussions were interesting from the point of trying to understand how people can be so closed minded and not see reason and common sense. I was there one day and 2 little old ladies called, asked for the boys who weren't home, I was polite and knew the verses they quoted at me, sadly too diplomatic and they didn't understand my sense of humour. A week later he brought the big guns, some leader type dude, must have thought they had a convert. I began by saying Jesus preached that slavery was proper, and he agreed and started telling me it was a good thing. They have never been back, any of them, we are blacklisted. My son and his mate haven't forgiven me 12 years later, they had lots more questions to ask.