Would you string several love interests along at the same time without them knowing? Why or why not?
This recently happened to me. Several women contacted me by mistakenly finding out about me on social media. We shared messages that he wrote to us and all have the same love lines in them. What a player! We all feel totally used.
I actually met him on this site. They didn't. It has really set me back. 
8
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19 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.@2muchstupidity /Suzanne
First may I recommmend you get rid of the "2muchstupidity name....self-degrading.
#2. I don't think any person intentionally "strings several love interests along at the same time without them knowing" ....what has happened to me is I developed an interest, then another one happens along....then another.
If you say to them that "you're pursuing someone else" then they quit and stop communicating... So in my opinion/strategy - I avoid being excessively "honest" and don't "confess" that you're involved in others. It's not "stringing" anyone along. It's being naturally friendly and reserving your privacy.
Don't get sick. It's life. Pursue others yourself. Play a similar game.
Or...if you're not happy - or "feeling sick" with being "involved" in more than one at a time...
Politely but honestly confront him/her and let them know you're monogamous...and that you won't be involved in anyone who's "pursuing others" at the same time.
Then you don't feel sick...you develop your own confidence through your own standards and honesty.
(S)he might respect that.
Robecology
Level 9
July 19, 2020
0
First..I'm not getting rid of the name. It's not self degrading. It's perfect for this site as too many people don't even question their religious beliefs which is pretty stupid in my opinion.
The rest of what you said I quite agree with. The problem comes in when one is told and led to believe the relationship is exclusive when in fact one finds out it isn't. That's called betrayal. Plain and simple.
Thank you for your thoughts, ideas, and opinions.
You know what they say. They say you need someone that will understand you. Someone that will make you laugh. Someone that will help you out around the house. Someone who will be a good sexual partner. You only have to make sure all those people don't know each other.
QuidamOutrepont
Level 8
July 19, 2020
0
I have dated more than one woman at a time, but only first and second dates while looking for a partner. Once I get to the point of having a true love interest, I say goodbye to the other.
Bobbyzen
Level 8
July 14, 2020
1
That's good!
In my 20s, I had two male lovers. I wasn't stringing them along. They both knew about each other.
Unfortunately, they both wanted more of my time and pressured me. I was in graduate school and working full time. I didn't have time for a relationship.
I realized having two lovers was crazy-making for all involved. So, I chose one.
After that, I focused on one man at a time.
LiterateHiker
Level 9
July 13, 2020
2
I would not string several love interests along at the same time without them knowing. That sounds like a very selfish, stressful, and complicated thing to do; and as you have made clear, is extremely unfair to the people you do it to. I'm sorry you had that experience.
Deb57
Level 8
July 12, 2020
1
This issue came up here a couple years ago. Can't help wondering if it's not the same Casanova. Modus operandi sure sounds familiar.
CallMeDave
Level 8
July 12, 2020
1
I can't imagine being involved with more than one woman at a time. I've done the dating thing, where I drive and I buy, but if it becomes physical you're supposed to settle on one. At least that's the way it used to be.
BitFlipper
Level 8
July 12, 2020
0
Strangers on social media aren't love interests. As long as you didn't give him any money.
barjoe
Level 9
July 11, 2020
1
Never gave him money and he never asked. I wasted 2 years.
@2muchstupidity Two years? Did you have a relationship?
@barjoe yes, we had a relationship!
@2muchstupidity u did not wasted 2 yrs . U had good x AND saved the next 10 yrs . He is an idiot . Happy that u don’t have to waste another day on trash . Trash need to go , bye bye trash .
Guess what ? Plenty of men around , up to u . Celebrate your good luck in style , and when u are ready , NEXT ! Enjoy ! ♥️♥️♥️ I am excited for u 
How did they find out about you?
It's definitely wrong unless it's part of the deal at the beginning.
Lorajay
Level 9
July 11, 2020
2
Found out through Facebook. I wished him a happy birthday with "love" and she saw it and contacted me. He always wanted to keep his private life out of it but I wrote that bd post anyway. Glad I did!
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