Does the term cis bother you? You can call.me late to dinner, but don't call me an isomer of stilbene, please.
For 54 years I've been a guy. Nothing whack or terribly odd. Just a guy.
Now I am cis, and I haven't done a thing to provoke it.
I'm as open minded as they come, and people should be who they are. But I really don't like being affixed with this new label.
Plus, it is all wrong. Here is the real definition:
cis1
sis/Submit
adjectiveCHEMISTRY
denoting or relating to a molecular structure in which two particular atoms or groups lie on the same side of a given plane in the molecule, in particular denoting an isomer in which substituents at opposite ends of a carbon–carbon double bond are on the same side of the bond.
"the cis isomer of stilbene"
So there.
2
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24 comments
Feel free to reply to any comment by clicking the "Reply" button.I think your post calls out the issue pretty well. There are people walking around everywhere that are the norm against which all others are measured. They are thought of and think of themselves in that way.
So, everyone not them gets a label. It is a very subtle kind of privilege that is very easy for everyone to miss. If you have always lived as the norm it feels awkward to suddenly be labeled. But it is how everyone else lives.
I think it is completely appropriate that everyone gets a label. It just helps to remind everyone that the differences are just differences not measures of worth. It may seem subtle, and in some ways silly, but for those that have always been labeled, it may help. Representation matters.
Just as an FYI, I have lived my life as just a guy. So while I am bi, it has never stopped me from inheriting the subtle privilege.
Roadster
Level 6
Apr 11, 2018
9
I see your point. I've got a few labels already. Blue collar, half deaf. Blond. I know what you're saying,
I'm sure the queer community didn't specifically target you by using the term. New terms for things come up all the time. My only problem is trying to keep up with all of them.
Try not to take things so personal.
kiramea
Level 7
Apr 11, 2018
4
cis isn't really about being queer though.
Never said it was. From my understanding the queer community is who coined the phrase. I'm including gay/bisexuals/lesbians/transgender in this.
I could not care less- I am not in anyway bothered by terminology. The “labels” have come about because of the oppression that the people who are in any other category than straight have experienced forever. If it takes naming or names or labels or categories to make anyone feel more counted or empowered or like they have a way to feel like they belong or it just makes anyone feel more comfortable then please do that. If a totally new structure needs to be created to include everyone who has been historically and violently marginalized then I will support that. It matters not to me unless it hurts someone.
Dolphin
Level 4
Apr 11, 2018
4
No.
We need the term "cisgender" to refer to non-transgender people. It's just practical. It's not an insult. It doesn't carry a bad connotation. It's not a slur.
We won't label you "normal" because it implies everyone else is "abnormal" -- and many people don't like being called abnormal. That, and "normal" in what way? If I just talk about "normal" people, you won't know what type of normal I'm talking about. If I say "cisgender", now you do. I can start talking about the "cisgender population", and you'll immediately know the discussion is about non-trans people.
You're complaining about something that helps the language and that isn't hurting you in any significant way. For every major outlier in the population that requires lots of discussion, we need to have a name for the people in that population, and a name for the people outside of that population.
We have the term 'white' for white people, even though whites are the majority. (In most English-speaking countries)
We have the term 'heterosexual' for heterosexuals, even though heteros are the majority.
And we have the term 'cisgender'. You may not be used to it, but it's not here to hurt you. It's just here to talk about a newly recognized group of people, and the distinctions between them and the statistically "normal" population. That's all.
alxa
Level 5
Apr 11, 2018
3
Then what is wrong with non-transgender. How hard is that. Do you like being labeled a word you don’t like. CIS just flat out sounds horrible it’s sound like your being labeled a cancer. I agree normal isn’t the right word. I don’t think I’ve ever been called normal anyways. And as far as I am concerned transgender gay bisexual pansexual are all just as normal as I am. If not more.
alxa:
@Donto101 Honestly, because it's shorter and more eloquent.
Now, sure! In your case, I'll say "non-transgender". I have no problem with making allowances for individual preferences.
But frankly, I discuss transgender topics a lot, having a more concise word to refer to the population at large is useful -- so unless, say, 10% of the educated (as in, not actively mistaking it for a word with an insulting meaning) non-transgender population has a problem with the word "cisgender", I'll still be using it in my writings in general -- because it's useful, and most people seem to have no problem with it.
I wouldn't mind being called cisgender. Hell, I WISH I could be cisgender. Being trans isn't exactly fun over here. But if you just have an aesthetic problem with the word itself, sure.
@alxa maybe it is just me but I simply just hate the word. To me it sounds very negative. Almost like a insult. I know transgender people have been called all kinds of insults like trannies or freaks so I’m sure the term CIS or cisgender doesn’t seem like such a bad thing. I agree compared to being called a freak tranny or chicks with dicks. It isn’t. And by the way I don’t use those turn and never will. But only wrote them here because it is relevant to my point. I’m not equating be call cis to those horrible slurs. I just think it is a horrible choice fad a label for non transgender people. I really don’t see it as eloquent at all. I just wish someone would come up with a better label. Like maybe he’ll i got nothing. Just want you to know I am on your side. I just absolutely hate the words cis and cisgender.
alxa:
@Donto101 Thank you for saying you are! I'm glad you're just expressing your discomfort and you're not trying to erase trans people. A lot of people may mistake that for your intention, here -- which is why people are getting mad. I was mad because I expected the same thing, but you seem genuinely well intentioned. 
If you don't want to be called that, I'll respect it.
@Palacinky you don’t have a clue what I believe. I believe being gay bi or transgender is just as normal as being straight. I think all the above is just how we are. And as far as shitting a brick over the term cis. I’m just saying I don’t like the term it’s horrible it sounds like some kind of cancer. As I have said before I have no problem with labeling but that label sucks. Is all I’m complaining about. There are people out there that might consider gay or transgender gender people abnormal but I’m not one of them. Don’t lump me in with them because I don’t like the term cis. There are lots of terms I don’t like. My son is autistic. I get really pissed off if someone calls him special. Like he isn’t a just as human as everyone else. He did is normal in his own way. Autism is his normal.
I already have a label it’s called straight. But if someone want to call me cis I could really careless I won’t answer to it. I don’t refer to myself as that. I have no problem with people labeling themselves as what ever they want. And I will respect that and even call them by that. but don’t go and give me some new strange ass label and expect me to accept it.
Donto101
Level 7
Apr 11, 2018
3
alxa:
I'm a straight trans girl. I was male assigned at birth, but my gender is female. I am attracted to males. I am straight. Calling yourself straight does not automatically distinguish you from trans people.
@alxa I will have respectfully disagree. Some people may have change the definition of straight. But straight as I have always know it is heterosexual And the gender you were assigned at birth on birth certificate according to your genitalia. Non LGBT. Or just plain boring. But if you want to call yourself straight I’m good with that. If you want to call you straight not a problem either. I’m ok with anything anyone one wants to label themselves. I respect people’s right to identify as what ever they want to be. But I expect the same. You can call me straight you can call me a straight heterosexual don’t call me cis. That is just some new made up bullshit word. I refuse to identify with. I just don’t like it. I have marched with LGBT community I have worked with them side-by-side on social issues and lobbied in Tallahassee with them. I have argued and fought With my Mormon brother when my niece came out as bisexual because he didn’t except her sexuality. I even moved her from West Virginia to Florida to stay with me so she didn’t have to be judged by family. So I’m not any right wing anti-LGBT nut job I just refuse to be a identified as CIS. You can call me white privileged all you want because I know I am I was born a white male in the United States My only disadvantage in life was being born poor. Unless you count being a fat ginger as a disadvantage Lol.
@Palacinky I’m not being defensive and I didn’t say anyone called me anti LGBT I just want to make that every ones knows I’m not one of those must jobs. And you are 100% right I can never understand what a transgender person or a gay person go through and understand all of your issues. Just st like I can never understand what a person of color has to endure. I’m a white straight man. I would be the poster child for white privileged if I was rich. But there isn’t much I can do about that except vote for pro LGBT candidates and vot for pro LGBT law when they come up for a vote. I’m on your side!
Your scary profile picture bothers me but not the term cis as it has never been applied to me.
SLBushway
Level 7
Apr 11, 2018
2
scary, really? Guess i better pick a different one. Can't hide the ugly though.
I don't use it myself, but I am certainly not offended by it.
BufftonBeotch
Level 8
Apr 11, 2018
3
I think we simply have too many labels.
To start with I am the totality of my biological and affective needs, personality traits and personal interests, experiences, values, beliefs and goals and relationships with others. So we identify and label all of that and then some, and we have a label that would apply to no-one else.
When I was young, I was simply a boy and expected to become a man. Or a child to become an adult. To be honest I have never bothered to find out what cis means or the point of such labels. If I introduced all the people I have here of a weekend, just on gender labels alone it would take hours. On job applications I never state gender, marital status or age. Noones business and does not affect how I work. If someone asked if I was cis, I would refuse to answer.
Rugglesby
Level 8
Apr 12, 2018
2
On job applications, I just leave Name: blank.
I dislike labels myself but I don't mind this one. "Cis" is a Latin prefix which means "on this side of", in contrast with "trans" which means "on the other side of". So if you identify as the gender you were assigned at birth, you're cis gender. I probably wouldn't introduce myself as a cis gender female unless the environment calls for it but I also don't have any problem using the term at all.
Mantra
Level 6
Apr 12, 2018
2
It's one of the gender label descriptions that have come into recent use. It means that you identify with your birth gender.
I am careful to qualify people as "cis hetero" instead of blanket labels like "males." For example, I may resemble as "female" and be a bio female, but as a partial transmale I don't identify as one, but as nonbinary. I don't identify strongly with either gender, but slightly more with males.
birdingnut
Level 8
Apr 11, 2018
2
@Beach_slim (sigh) You seem to be equating someone's bio body with their gender identity.
There are intersex people (people with genitals that can't be readily identified as male or female, or have the characteristics of both..i.e., a male with breasts), although they are rare, but even they have a preferred gender identity.
People have a biological birth gender,
a chromosomal gender (they could look female, but have XXY chromosomes, for instance)
a gender identity..what gender they "know" they are. Part of me "knows" he is male, but because I take derris scandens, a local Thai herb, it blends my gender modes so that I only feel androgynous (mixed gender) now.
I'm "nonbinary" because I don't strongly identify with either gender. A recent study found that 20% of Millennials identify as nonbinary.
a social gender identity-how the person present in public. I dress androgynously, although if I increase the derris scandens I dosages take, I can tolerate some female clothes and jewelry.
How they behave: My behavior is a blend of female and male, which matches my clothing and gender identity. I look like a delicate little female, a 65 year old woman, but if you were to try to keep up with me, you'd be shocked.
I can out-hike, out-shoot, out-ride (horses and motorbikes), out-shoot (only at targets), and generally outdo most men at many things, and men who try to hike with me never ask again.
This makes me a bit scary for normal males, but I attract men who love daring adventurous types.
@Beach_slim It is. The US is fond of labels, whereas in Thailand, where a high percentage of people are transgender and most seem to be bisexual, there are few labels, but most Thai people accept any gender presentation here without comment.
Don't worry..people usually don't pay attention to things that don't directly affect them. I was clueless about gender issues until 2014, when I realized I was a partial transmale..that motivated me to do some research, and catch myself up to speed on such things.
Sounds like someone from Game of Thrones. Sir Cis, Isomer of the Stilbene. And, no, I don't like the "Cis" term. It's superfluous.
Zenguy
Level 2
Apr 12, 2018
1
Cisperfluous?
Naw. It doesn’t bother me. I mean it’s not a dirty word. What ever that is. I do think all the little boxes we are putting people in a little confusing but Im old enough to use ignorance as an excuse.
Punch
Level 4
Apr 12, 2018
1
At what age does ignorance become an excuse? I can't wait.
@CallMeDave when you can no long remember the things you use to know. Hell im only 48 and I’m already forgetting shit I’ll be one ignorant bastard by the time I hit 80 if I make it that far. Lol
I just don't like being called a prefix. It rubs my English major self the wrong way. Also, they're kind of mangling the Latin as 'transgender', from everything I've seen means 'gender transitioned/transitioning', rather than 'the other side of gender.'
These are minor points that don't mean much to me at the end of the day. What bothers me is all the 'die, cis scum' I've been seeing out there.
memorylikeasieve
Level 7
Apr 11, 2018
1
I don't mind the labels. I guess id be a cisgender bisexual woman and even that fluctuates lol . I like to be informed and I try to address people by their preferred noun or label. I see nothing wrong with it.
dianahdz88
Level 3
Apr 11, 2018
1
No, Google "cis", I had to, it means basically a manly man. Cool down!
AnneWimsey
Level 9
Apr 11, 2018
0
alxa:
No. It means someone with a male gender identity, who was assigned male at birth. Or someone with a female gender identity, who was assigned female at birth.
There are manly trans men, and they are every bit as manly. (Despite being assigned female at birth) Wherever you found that definition -- it's highly misleading and potentially invalidating at best.
Yes, cis bothers me, but only because there is already a perfectly good name for us: het or heteosexual. I have friends of all persuasions, and some of them weren't well defined by straight society, so I understand the need for clarification with more designations. Why we need to drop HET for CIS, however, just seems a duplication based on nothing.
hemingwaykitten
Level 6
Apr 11, 2018
1
cis means not trans, as I understand it, and does not imply preference in partners.
If you "identify" as the gender you were born (hey! What about hermaphrodites?!) then you are cis,
I could be wrong, but I always thought het referred to sexuality and cis referred to gender, which are not the same thing. It is difficult for me to follow all the hair splitting with the terminology of late. I don't really care what you do, you do you. 
alxa:
You have not done your research. Transgender identity has NOTHING to do with homosexuality.
Language evolves continuously, it seems silly to get offended because a word has been adapted to a new situation. Hetero- and homo- when used to describe sexual preference had similar origins. I rarely describe myself as cis but when talking about gender issues it is a useful qualifier.
Buttercup
Level 8
May 11, 2018
0
True. Hetero was very rarely heard 25 odd yrs ago. Danke.
See I got a label I use for everyone it fits for just about everyone ....Morons
Simon1
Level 7
Apr 12, 2018
0
step away from the mirror. Kidding.
My comment wasn't about being ugly it was about the way you looked into whatever you used to take the picture. To me - I wouldn't want to meet you in a dark ally because you look like you want to possess my soul. Sit back a little, blink, smile even and comb the hair out of your face - at that point I'm sure your picture will be fine .
SLBushway
Level 7
Apr 11, 2018
0
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