Sorry to alarm everyone. And thank you all for the messages. This is nothing new for me though. I was just in a room of a lot of people that are in essence my friends (co-workers) yet none of them really know how I feel.
And I really feel bad vomiting this all on you guys. It's nice that I can be honest with people, but y'all don't deserve this.

I know. You are not alone. But this is the one of the most stressful times in history. We all have to hang together.

Suicidal thoughts are a biochemical imbalance. As example, going cold turkey on some SSRI's is guaranteed to induce suicidal thoughts. Assuming you'd prefer not to have them, seek an appropriate regimen, whether herbal or pharmaceutical or...? Get help. Feel free to DM me.

I've been there. If you get too down, do seek help. I found it; took a lot of time. I know your pain is real. Many of us do. You are worth being.

You did the right thing by reaching out,

Jeff! This sounds quite alarming! What can i/we do to help?

It's all good bro. Life has it's moments. Stick around! See what happens. It'll get better.

What’s up man . Wanna talk to me ? Can u msg me pls ?
I can give u my # and text if u want .
I ve been there . Let’s talk

Are you ok?